Personally, I can't produce well- nothing deep, risky, or innovative- for people who "rule" that way. And if I do it's because I've found another job and don't mind getting fired. Aggghh! Got my blood boiling! HA!
I feel your pain as if it was mine. My children are trying to console me, but I just keep crying. I can't imagine the strength it took to share this with everyone. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH.
Yes, Lori, but it has never been this profound or lasted as long.
I am very okay with it though, because the answer I always get is "patience", don't push.
Funny, I know who I am and what I'm doing here, but right now I'm to do nothing but the essentials and the things that pop up to be attended to. It was hard to deal with at first because my whole life has been full of momentum moving forward. I still feel like I'm moving forward but I'm not doing anything like writing or researching to move it forward.
I talk to my mom whenever I start wondering and like your friend, she listens.
Great fun!!
I think that there is a "good life" to tap into for each of us, and it's possible to feel what that is and to focus on it (or a part of it) and let ideas flow to you to achieve the best...
I regularly look at what I want and focus on it and get it OR the feeling that patience is needed.
The only thing I wanted yesterday was a house. And I found one. Waiting to hear today. It has all the space we need, it's in the right school system (small and familiar) , is in our old neighborhood AND is within walking distance of water! LOL! Everything I wanted! I can't control the decision on the other end, but it sure feels good to be "in the flow"!!!
So true. The "universe" provides little things to lift and nourish just when we need it. I'm reminded to make memories with the people I love that will sustain me later in life...or tomorrow, whichever comes first.
@TheJackB Yes, I am. Before I drove a car that's how I got around. Distance didn't matter. If I needed to get somewhere I knew that I could. I think it's practical to have a bike in case of emergencies when you can't get gas, or when your car dies. Might take longer, but you get in shape at the same time.
(had to come back and paste in my comment because I wasn't sure it stayed. Sorry if it's a duplicate)
Made me cry. Really. Wiping tears. Sniffing. Trying to figure out what the tears are for. And then I remembered that there are three little girls sleeping on the floor just feet from me and will wonder what's wrong if I wake them up....so, I'm getting a grip and moving on!
Made me cry. Really. Wiping tears. Sniffing. Trying to figure out what the tears are for. And then I remembered that there are three little girls sleeping on the floor just feet from me and will wonder what's wrong if I wake them up....so, I'm getting a grip and moving on!
I suck at seeing black holes. You know how moths are attracted to a flame that kills them? I'm the master of denial that playing with darkness harms me. Did I say that right? I can see and feel someone's negativity and steer clear, but I let those same people criticize and try to destroy my light. It's so subtle.I absolutely suck at truly believing that there's nobody who can be a better me than me, and by being me I will feel joy.
HA! My little James just learned to ride a two-wheeler, and I missed it! I'm with you about freedom. My kids still make me nervouse when they take off to parts unknown! I have to get a bike so that I can keep up!
Couldn't resist sharing! Just found on Pinterest...http://media-cache-ec5.pinterest.com/upload/33143747227197386_HyfiQS5J_f.jpg
On a college admission essay I said that I wanted to be a marine biologist, even though I was in love with ballet. LOL! But I was also drawn to art and languages. I fell into family history. It's my "warm spot in the room." It's what I do without trying. You know? I mean, I work at it, but I don't try to love it. I just do. The older I get the more my dreams and my life reflect who I am at my core....and I expect to be led to a deeper, richer version every day!
newest post : http://weforgotyounot.wordpress.com/2012/07/30/dr-mccleans-worm-specific/
Funny. I was having fun and am back to being serious right when traffic slows; however, that happened last summer and I didn't notice 'cause I guess I didn't know enough to care. ??
Bucket lists? They help me to understand a person better and to see where their head is at. I figured that people started making them when diagnosed with imminent death (aren't we all?) and came to grips with what touches their soul deeply enough to add to the to-do list.
Every day has its bucket list...or at least it should.
Smile, love, laugh, learn. serve....(with / for / at /about) the person God just placed in your path...before you get hit by that bus!
I think that people gravitate to the places that they grew up with whether it be the mountains, the city, the water, or a favorite vacation destination. I can rejuvenate anywhere, but, like you, water is special. It's #1 on my list when looking for a house if we are relocating. I have to be able to walk to it or at least have it very close so it's not a hardship to get to it.
The ocean makes me feel safe and protected like a warm blanket, yet free because of the endless horizon.
Swimming lets my moods dissipate without hurting me, like running, etc.
The smells of seaweed, low tide sulfur, and creosote from boat engines are so comforting because they mean, "I remember this place."
Going to the beach later today!! All are welcome!
Hate when that happens! LOL! Patterns can be very annoying, even though they give you hope.
"Take a deep breath and relax"??? Sometimes...
I look at it like I do a brick wall and always look for a way around it...after I go for a swim!
Try having 9 kids where you inflate and deflate and have people not only touching your belly, but talking to it! HAHA! NOT FUN!
The cure for our bodies is no mirrors and three months of intense survival like on Survivor where you have to eat what you catch or forage!
No comments turns a post into a monologue.Yuck. Don't like talking to myself. I can't grow out of my bubble unless I'm challenged with new thoughts.
I watched my 10 1/2-yr-old on the kiddee rides at the county fair last night. It was bittersweet to see how beautiful she is and to witness her being turned away from some of the rides because she was too tall. Her childhood has almost ended. So strange.
On Sunday I woke up with lingering darkness that I didn't cause, but I wasn't strong enough to resist. It is unusual for me to get caught in its web and to be sucked in so completely that I actually feel depressed. But that's where I was Sunday morning until I found myself talking to a woman who immediately and unknowingly, just by being near me and having a benign conversation about nothing, lifted my mood. I was so surprised. I realized, because of our conversation, that she had her own struggles. Yet, she was the one who made a difference to me that morning. I went home rejuvenated. I had no new thoughts from the conversation that bouyed me up or kind words to reflect upon. I'm used to those things helping. This experience is exactly what you're talking about and it has been a long time since I've had the pleasure of experiencing such a simple and unexpected shift which proves the point that we influence for good and bad with our light!!
Thanks, Bern!
I agree. I give something everything I've got until I hit an impenetrable wall. I'll sit back and wait for inspiration and direction, but I know it'll come in its own time. So i get out of my way and shift my focus on something else.
That happened this weekend. Happens all the time. I just wrote about it (first post in a long time!):
http://weforgotyounot.wordpress.com/2012/07/23/who-needs-me/
Interesting that after I posted it your post came through my email, and that the subject is so apropos!
Happy Birthday to the Dark-Haired Beauty!
A few years back my Kyle caught me crying, so overwhelmed with frustration. He put a Cheerios necklace we'd made earlier in the day over my head and said it was for courage. Touched me so deeply. But I felt the same way you describe. Those struggles are mine. Not theirs. I love the innocence of childhood and find a lot of strength watching them.
Childhood really does pass so quickly. But the memories are priceless.
I'm going to go out on a "Betsy" limb here and assume we're not really talking about coffee.
I don't drink it. LOL!
As I was reading I was jumping between thoughts of efficiency, Frank Lloyd Wright, Mies van der Rohe (sp?), creativity, getting what you pay for, and ...well my mind is spinning! HA!
I thought and thought and thought, and for me it comes down to money and vision (if that's the way to put it).
Stay "small" and in control, raising rates because you can only serve so many clients (of course the product would have to be exceptional. Right?), or train mini-you's because your vision is bigger.
Some of us crave self-expression and will pay for it or anything that sells it to us.
But if we can only afford the cookie-cutter things in life, we find ways to make it our own somehow, too.
So much to say, so little time!!
Have a great weekend, Ralph!