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hahahahaha Ryan Malone

3 days, 11 hours ago on Game 80 – Pens Beat the Ded Wings

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@KMT59 then again, you never know...if tuukka rask gets injured the east becomes a total tossup

4 days, 11 hours ago on Current Playoff Matchups

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@KMT59 all the way to the second round maybe

4 days, 11 hours ago on Current Playoff Matchups

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Comedy Central should keep running "The Colbert Report," but it should just be the theme music followed by two consecutive episodes of The Eric Andre Show

4 days, 11 hours ago on Current Playoff Matchups

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@shooter` @orby @Dapper Dad Man this is only vaguely related but Travis Ishikawa actually looks a lot like Garrett Jones and I was really confused the first time I saw Ishikawa on first

4 days, 11 hours ago on Current Playoff Matchups

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@Dapper Dad Man @orby he will, snider and tabata aren't good enough to bury him and one of them is liable to be injured by june anyway

4 days, 11 hours ago on Current Playoff Matchups

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@Gmus @orby i saw him twice. 100 mph pitches are impressive even from the bleachers

4 days, 11 hours ago on Current Playoff Matchups

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if Gregory Polanco makes his MLB debut in Pittsburgh this summer I will drop everything and pay just about anything to go to that game

4 days, 11 hours ago on Current Playoff Matchups

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@KLIMAS WINS @orby @shooter` coincidentally i also recently tweeted this

https://twitter.com/orbsonb/status/454284458506854404

4 days, 11 hours ago on Current Playoff Matchups

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@shooter` @orby the PC term is "shoobie"

4 days, 11 hours ago on Current Playoff Matchups

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@shooter` who's this asshole

4 days, 11 hours ago on Current Playoff Matchups

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Ryan MIller's save percentage with the Blues is .903...Halak's is .923 with the Caps

5 days, 1 hour ago on Current Playoff Matchups

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@Lindas1st  no thanks

5 days, 2 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@BDF @PezDOY  all in the family was good too

5 days, 10 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@BDF @PezDOY  Seinfeld and peak-era Always Sunny are the only sitcoms I ever really loved

5 days, 10 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@presidentjlh  McDonald's = worst

5 days, 10 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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sadly these parts are just little asides, 80 percent of it is just interviews with experts. i kinda wish it was a really poorly acted Lifetime drama

5 days, 10 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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speaking of being a teacher, i have to watch a 3 hour instructional video on child abuse in which this 35 year old man with a ponytail was supposed to be a high school student 


http://i.imgur.com/UZD5TT6.png

5 days, 10 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@shooter` @JenBroflovski @KONP @DoobyDoobyDoo @orby  damn that was almost simultaneous verbatim

5 days, 11 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@JenBroflovski @shooter` @KONP @DoobyDoobyDoo @orby  thank NCLB for that

5 days, 11 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@KONP @DoobyDoobyDoo @orby @JenBroflovski  zero tolerance becomes a catch-22, you don't want to create an environment where kids are afraid to stand up for themselves but you also don't want to create an environment where the school becomes a fight arena

5 days, 11 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@shooter`  welcome back joe vitale

5 days, 11 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@KONP @JenBroflovski @DoobyDoobyDoo  IMO it shouldn't even need to get to that point, kids need to be made comfortable enough with telling teachers that they're being bullied or are in danger that the aggressors get punished before it even comes to a fight

5 days, 11 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@JenBroflovski @DoobyDoobyDoo  agreed, teachers and administrators need to make efforts to stop stuff like this from festering. it's your job to help and protect kids, not just teach them

5 days, 11 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@beeline @DoobyDoobyDoo  that was glove, not toe though, so i might've missed the one you're talking about

5 days, 11 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@DoobyDoobyDoo  fleury's stop on alfredsson followed by this goal might be the funniest and most entertaining shootout sequence i've ever watched

5 days, 11 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@PezDOY  i've been there

5 days, 11 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@PezDOY  summation: he was drunk and trying to get laid but the girl didn't want to do it so he just stood around being drunk instead

5 days, 11 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@KONP @orby @J.O.  now he looks dead, but is still singing Satisfaction

5 days, 11 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@KONP @orby @J.O.  mick jagger once said he'd rather be dead than singing "satisfaction" at age 40

5 days, 11 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@Gmus @orby  mostly because I wanted David Lynch to be involved

5 days, 11 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@Gmus @orby  I'm kind of disappointed that we don't get to see Louis CK's fictional Late Show saga play out in real life

5 days, 11 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@KONP @orby @J.O.  true. stone and parker just always struck me as the types to go out on top rather than keep making the same stuff long after the novelty wore off a la Matt Groening (who is apparently worth half a billion dollars, jesus christ)

5 days, 11 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@KONP @orby @J.O.  of course they could always make more but is it worth the effort anymore

5 days, 11 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@KONP @orby @J.O.  they're already worth a combined $600 mil

5 days, 11 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@J.O. @orby  i can't believe Parker and Stone still feel compelled to make that show, it has only been sporadically watchable for the past 5 or 6 seasons and they're so rich now that they could probably just bathe in gold all day for the rest of their lives

5 days, 11 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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Colbert hosting the Late Show could be good. He's a pretty logical, safe choice (and much smarter/funnier than Jon Stewart IMO). Comedy Central gets screwed hard though, they're losing one of their two biggest draws

5 days, 11 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@DoobyDoobyDoo  goatse?

5 days, 12 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@bgw @orby  more evidence of gary buttman rigging the league in their favor

5 days, 14 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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if the postseason was a shootout contest i'd pick fleury 100 times out of 100, he's so much better at it than he is at anything else. even though jussi's having a down year shootout-wise, the fact that the Pens have both Fleury and Jokinen makes them unfairly good at shootouts

5 days, 14 hours ago on The Miracle on Turf

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@shooter`  used to catch those all the time in Animal Crossing

6 days ago on Gameday 80 – Red Wings at Pens

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@stapler  why the hell does babcock care, they made the playoffs, why bitch about one point

6 days ago on Gameday 80 – Red Wings at Pens

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@J.O.  President of Hockey Operations Darius Kasparaitis

6 days ago on Gameday 80 – Red Wings at Pens

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@J.O.  as long as Max Talbot doesn't end up as the Pens' GM I say let 'em play

6 days ago on Gameday 80 – Red Wings at Pens

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@Apples @J.O. @orby  favorite part is it turned out to be an insane man in fucking Dublin

6 days ago on Gameday 80 – Red Wings at Pens

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@Gmus @orby  i'm totally not a member of the NSA and i'm totally not tracing all of your calls and emails right now, so you're fine, citizen

6 days ago on Gameday 80 – Red Wings at Pens

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@presidentjlh @orby  the classic harold/kumar mixup. happens all the time

6 days ago on Gameday 80 – Red Wings at Pens

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someone wrote a bomb threat for 4/20 one year when i was in high school (hmmm wonder why). the school responded by installing a metal detector and making everyone go through the same entrance to use said metal detector. the irony is that if there were a real bomb, the fact that they had everyone in the entire school crowded into one tiny area would've probably meant everyone would have died

6 days ago on Gameday 80 – Red Wings at Pens

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@presidentjlh  par the course for Rivalry Night (tm)

6 days ago on Gameday 80 – Red Wings at Pens

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@AngryPanda @orby  actually i'm sure people brought knives, but as far as i know nobody brandished them as weapons or ran around flailing them at people

6 days ago on Gameday 80 – Red Wings at Pens

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