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Fuck me.


9 months ago on Game One, Game On

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The Vermont runner is obviously doing something great.  But he is also slower than Denton.

1 year, 3 months ago on The Power of Positive Vibes

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@Red It's staggering how different this feels from last year.  Except that you're still drunk.


1 year, 3 months ago on Smashing Beers and Expectations

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Thank you Rays, for your unwonted impatience.  Really, thx.


1 year, 3 months ago on Smashing Beers and Expectations

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I think that unravelled exactly as Nostrathomas predicted, no?

1 year, 3 months ago on Three the Hard Way

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@alexis_b82 @Tom Miles It was magnificent, wasn't it?  Not quite Block standard though, obvs.

1 year, 3 months ago on Three the Hard Way

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Stop. Nava time.


1 year, 3 months ago on Three the Hard Way

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Solo ding wins it right here, folks.  Nostrathomas has spoken.

1 year, 3 months ago on Three the Hard Way

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Hanrahanrananrahan looks doughy and vulnerable to me.  Closers need to be either INTENSE or IMPASSIVE, n'est-ce pas?

1 year, 3 months ago on Three the Hard Way

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@Sox on the Beach Ha!  And that comment ISN'T 'malformed'?  Worst software ever.  (Not that the original sentiment isn't heartfelt, obvs.)

1 year, 3 months ago on Opening Day Mood: Ecstatic

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@Sox on the Beach @Tom Miles I love you and want to do despicable things to you.


1 year, 3 months ago on Opening Day Mood: Ecstatic

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mlb.com coverage is cool.  They just showed Don and Jerry's proleptic summary of the game (recorded into camera and presuming nothing untoward happens in the bottom of the ninth).  x

1 year, 3 months ago on Opening Day Mood: Ecstatic

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Larvarnawhy is going to make me  proud.

1 year, 11 months ago on Red Sox & Dodgers Set to Complete Tradezilla

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Miles still hates livefyre.

2 years, 2 months ago on Unbreakable?

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WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

 

 

2 years, 3 months ago on Commander Found, Ells Lost

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Pretty pitch.

2 years, 3 months ago on Commander Found, Ells Lost

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Shit.  Still, a very nice AB from Aviles.

2 years, 3 months ago on Commander Found, Ells Lost

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DON'T FUCKING SWING.

 

2 years, 3 months ago on Commander Found, Ells Lost

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 @Jennie Nostrathomas is never wrong.

2 years, 3 months ago on Commander Found, Ells Lost

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Walk DMC

2 years, 3 months ago on Commander Found, Ells Lost

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D-Mac's going to make me proud.

2 years, 3 months ago on Commander Found, Ells Lost

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I have a minor man crush on Sweeney.

2 years, 3 months ago on Commander Found, Ells Lost

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Papi says "Fuck you, Bieber!"

2 years, 3 months ago on Commander Found, Ells Lost

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 @hannah82 You're full of shit.

2 years, 3 months ago on Commander Found, Ells Lost

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Also, sports hernia sounds like the name of a bad satirical website.

2 years, 3 months ago on Commander Found, Ells Lost

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YOUUUUUUUUK

2 years, 3 months ago on Commander Found, Ells Lost

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The SG hive mind would do a better job managing this team.  Just him somewhere.

2 years, 3 months ago on Commander Found, Ells Lost

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HIT HIM IN THE HEAD111

2 years, 3 months ago on Commander Found, Ells Lost

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Was anyone else going "Don't swing, take the walk"?

2 years, 3 months ago on Commander Found, Ells Lost

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SALTYMUTHAFUCKAAAA1111

2 years, 3 months ago on Commander Found, Ells Lost

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Livefyre sucks donkey balls.  Can we not get haloscan back?  And Kyle Snyder.  And Leskanic.

2 years, 3 months ago on Hopes Turn to Clay

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Padilla makes Jason Giambi seem well-groomed.

2 years, 3 months ago on Hopes Turn to Clay

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Wow, Lars really smacked the shit out of that ball.  Aaron Bates is dead to me.

2 years, 4 months ago on I Heard You Missed Us We’re Back

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batebaw gam.

 

2 years, 4 months ago on I Heard You Missed Us We’re Back

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I'm not sure I want to ride on a vehicle built by an old photo of a baseball player. Because it's not 1968 and I don't see Timothy Leary anywhere hereabouts. But I am sighing and getting over it. This position is not incompatible with wanting to slap John Lackey, however. He may be 6-4 since the ASB but his ERA in that period is around 9.00. Simply not good enough. He should retire or at the very least take a sabbatical and spend more time with his family.

2 years, 10 months ago on The Ellis Burks Glamour Shot Says Chill the F$%k Out, People, and Root Your Boys On to the Playoffs

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But bad hair. Because Minnesota is stuck in the 1980's.

2 years, 11 months ago on Last Night’s NESN Pre-Game Show, If I Wrote the Script

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@hayes Big hands, you know you're the one...

2 years, 11 months ago on Salvation Lies in the Hands of John Lackey. And Other Things That Scare The Crap Out of Me.

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@bjchit Really? It was a foot inside the batter's box. Nothing to see here, just McCarver bullshit.

2 years, 11 months ago on Salvation Lies in the Hands of John Lackey. And Other Things That Scare The Crap Out of Me.

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I've seen the future and it works.

2 years, 11 months ago on Salvation Lies in the Hands of John Lackey. And Other Things That Scare The Crap Out of Me.

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How's your ERA looking now, fat boy?

2 years, 11 months ago on Salvation Lies in the Hands of John Lackey. And Other Things That Scare The Crap Out of Me.

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@Jennie Vindicated. A walk really is as good as a home run.

3 years ago on Where Have All the Good Times Gone?

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@Jennie Did Svcoots score?

3 years ago on Where Have All the Good Times Gone?

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Nice pick.

3 years ago on Where Have All the Good Times Gone?

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Quick rundown of the scoring please. I was reading a bedtime story and missed it.

3 years ago on Where Have All the Good Times Gone?

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@English Sox Fan I remember arriving back from Edinburgh from the festival about fifteen years ago. Sunny and warm in Scotland, fabulous. Disembarked at King's Cross and nearly melted in the heat.

3 years ago on Where Have All the Good Times Gone?

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@Sharpie Man, Svcoots played in Oakland for years. He knows that BB>/=HR.

3 years ago on Where Have All the Good Times Gone?

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ESF, I hope you didn't spend the whole of this beautiful day in the car?

3 years ago on Where Have All the Good Times Gone?

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@GarrettCRW He's rillymadaboutitfuckshitcock.

3 years ago on Where Have All the Good Times Gone?

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@Tex19 Done. And he's Svcoots forever if he goes yard.

3 years ago on Where Have All the Good Times Gone?

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Leadoff homer for Svcoots. Next Inning. I'm calling it. Sharpie and I are NEVER WRONG.

3 years ago on Where Have All the Good Times Gone?

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Sharpie and I are NEVER WRONG.

3 years ago on Where Have All the Good Times Gone?

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Svcoots HR. I'm calling it.

3 years ago on Where Have All the Good Times Gone?

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Oh, big man.

3 years ago on Where Have All the Good Times Gone?

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But Sammy was on more PEDs than Keith Richards, so it doesn't count.

3 years ago on Where Have All the Good Times Gone?

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Whatever the outcome of this situation I think everyone should know that Andrew Miller is the motherfucking truth. We now have two evil lefties who will fuck your shit up. (Apologies for the obscenity but I feel that, in context, it is necessary.)

3 years ago on Where Have All the Good Times Gone?

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Darnell, your cousin is such an asshole.

3 years ago on Where Have All the Good Times Gone?

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Reddick is a monster waiting to happen. Give him some ABs against lefties and he won't be significantly worse than McD or MikeOld.

3 years ago on Interleague Blues

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I like to believe that big Mike doesn't like anything after 'Eden'. Must have picked up college radio from one of those all-female Liberal Arts institutions you have in the North-East.

3 years ago on The Adventures of Ellsbury ‘n’ Elf: Mike Timlin Solves the John Lackey Problem

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Your concerns about Drew's defence are ill-founded at best. He'll end up around .270 and his OBP will be just shy of .400. At present there's no need to meddle with anything. Continuity is key in team sports. That is all.

3 years, 1 month ago on All Eyes On Red Sox

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At this rate you guys are going to have to start liveblogging just to give the rest of the league a chance.

3 years, 1 month ago on “Is There No One On This Planet Who Will Challenge Me?”

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If you didn't enjoy that you have no soul.

3 years, 1 month ago on Open Letter to the D-Bag Who Stood and Cheered When Youk Got Plunked During Last Night’s Game

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OH CAPTAIN, MY CAPTAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111

3 years, 1 month ago on Open Letter to the D-Bag Who Stood and Cheered When Youk Got Plunked During Last Night’s Game

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Brent Lillibridge is angry because he has a pussy's name. He could five home runs in this game but he'd still have a pussy's name. And be a pussy.

3 years, 1 month ago on Open Letter To The Red Sox

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Everything is shit nowadays. I think we should go back to a time when guys like Tim Wakefield and Omar Vizquel played in the big leagues.

3 years, 1 month ago on Open Letter To The Red Sox

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Shit. A demain mes braves.

3 years, 2 months ago on Play Ball! Please…

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*Martin Sheen voice* @English Sox Fan

3 years, 2 months ago on Play Ball! Please…

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It appears to be raining, ahem, wicked hard.

3 years, 2 months ago on Play Ball! Please…

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Stop. Papi time.

3 years, 2 months ago on Play Ball! Please…

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@hayes Hot bouncy girls behind home. That's what for.

3 years, 2 months ago on Play Ball! Please…

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Also, Boesch is harshing my mellow.

3 years, 2 months ago on Play Ball! Please…

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Hot bouncy girl behind home has my vote.

3 years, 2 months ago on Play Ball! Please…

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@hayes Seems that way but there are statistics to disprove it.

3 years, 2 months ago on Play Ball! Please…

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Yessssssssssssssssss.

3 years, 2 months ago on Play Ball! Please…

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hahahahahahahahahahaha @StacyB

3 years, 2 months ago on Play Ball! Please…

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In the image on the previous post Eliza Dushku, whom I admire, looks like a blow-up doll.

3 years, 2 months ago on Play Ball! Please…

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*Roy Scheider voice*

We're gonna need a bigger strike zone. Has the home plate ump not noticed the weather?

3 years, 2 months ago on Beauty And The Beard

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Imma watch batebaw gam n get fucked up. Who cares about the rain? Milli Vanilli?

3 years, 2 months ago on Beauty And The Beard

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@Tex19 "I have a large piece of confectionery in my mouth. You probably won't be able to understand what I'm saying."

3 years, 3 months ago on Let’s Win One For…Let’s Just Win One

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Lolz

3 years, 3 months ago on Let’s Win One For…Let’s Just Win One

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Also, can we lay off the Potter references. Kids might be watching.

3 years, 3 months ago on Let’s Win One For…Let’s Just Win One

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I'm really struggling with my dissertation.

3 years, 3 months ago on Let’s Win One For…Let’s Just Win One

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FUCK YOU ESSAY

3 years, 3 months ago on Let’s Win One For…Let’s Just Win One

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Don't hit it to him.

3 years, 3 months ago on For This I Froze My Ass Off?

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He is a Golden God.

3 years, 3 months ago on For This I Froze My Ass Off?

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Proper batebaw.

3 years, 3 months ago on For This I Froze My Ass Off?

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Our boy's wicked smart.

3 years, 3 months ago on For This I Froze My Ass Off?

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Also, tonight is the first evening of the rest of your lives or somesuch trite nonsense. J D Drew walkoff. I can smell it.

3 years, 3 months ago on NESN Presents: The Adventures of Ellsbury ‘n’ Elf, Episode 64-B, “Because Nothing Heals Like Beer”

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Also, big man hugs to you. @Tex19

3 years, 3 months ago on You Can’t Be First. But You Can Be Next.

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@Tex19 I'm saying I use firefox and I have the same problem.

3 years, 3 months ago on You Can’t Be First. But You Can Be Next.

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@Tex19 I think it might be a firefox thing. Are you using firefox?

3 years, 3 months ago on You Can’t Be First. But You Can Be Next.

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Nice pooch.

I think Hayes has broken me.

3 years, 3 months ago on You Can’t Be First. But You Can Be Next.

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I now have no points because of bad behaviour. Please like me. I am a like slut.

3 years, 3 months ago on Girl, You — and All of Red Sox Nation — Know It’s True

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You have to say though, that Salty is a bit ABERCROMBIEMODELWATBATEBAWGAM and the new pitching coach looks considerably more like a janitor than Greek God John Farrell. Me, I'd like to win exactly 62 of the unaccounted-for games. In order to do this more than two of our line-up need to perform on any given night. I fully expect Daisuke to flipping kill tonight. I will be asleep, wearing a skimpy, yet elaborate costume.

Working out a few bugs before hayes comes to town.

3 years, 3 months ago on Girl, You — and All of Red Sox Nation — Know It’s True

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Getting closer. By tiny increments.

3 years, 3 months ago on What I Did On My Vacation

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Nice.

3 years, 3 months ago on What I Did On My Vacation

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I hate batebaw.

3 years, 3 months ago on Faith in a Long, Tall Texan

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Mother

Fucker

3 years, 3 months ago on Faith in a Long, Tall Texan

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Well, that's a positive we can take out of this weekend. No PapelBlownSaves. @SoxFaninMD

3 years, 3 months ago on Faith in a Long, Tall Texan

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Fuck you Rangers, I rooted for the Giants. They had that Panda guy and the stoner and Matt Cain. That's right, I rooted for Barry Bonds over you guys. Hurts, doesn't it. Machikne.

3 years, 3 months ago on Faith in a Long, Tall Texan

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Dennys Reyes hated the 1980's. Just couldn't keep a snood on.

3 years, 3 months ago on Faith in a Long, Tall Texan

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Well, either we suck or they're cheating.

3 years, 3 months ago on Faith in a Long, Tall Texan

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@YDDE Tom says there's winning, and there's winning with grace.

3 years, 3 months ago on Faith in a Long, Tall Texan

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Carl, nice. You still owe me $5.

3 years, 3 months ago on Faith in a Long, Tall Texan

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That's the ridiculous curve I remember from his minor years.

3 years, 3 months ago on Faith in a Long, Tall Texan

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The pretzels in Liverpool are awful. Chips and curry sauce, that's the ticket.

3 years, 3 months ago on Faith in a Long, Tall Texan

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Kinsler needs a fastball right in his stupid fucking teeth.

3 years, 3 months ago on Faith in a Long, Tall Texan

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LOL DEFENCE

3 years, 3 months ago on Faith in a Long, Tall Texan

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Better.

3 years, 3 months ago on Faith in a Long, Tall Texan

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Sometimes you're the snake, sometimes you're the honey badger. Sometimes it rains.

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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I miss Rudy Seanez.

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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Am I glad I didn't stay up for this game. Wait...

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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@Fla Beck/Becky We're reserving our anxiety for Carl Crawford.

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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PAPOOOOULI

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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Dustin says 'We can still win 162 games!'

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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But she got it from Tie Rack and their exchange policy is Draconian.

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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Denys Reyes' wife bought him a scarf for Christmas. He was like "WTF?"

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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@urn-ie @Nan Schweitzer

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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@Nan Herb

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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They named a country after this guy. It was a while ago.

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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Albers > Albert.

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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I'm excited to witness the beginning of what will surely become known as 'The Matt Albers Era".

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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@urn-ie @Nan Fausto should demand a refund from Mephistophelo.

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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Adrian on pace for 900 RBIs in 2011.

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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Jacoby is going to be a fucking monster this year.

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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That's a softball out. Didn't know that was a baseball rule.

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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Fuck that guy.

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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@YDDE Precisely. Nostrathomas already in mid-season form.

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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@Ben (02144) Doesn't count. Remember to exercise.

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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You're right there. Large as life and twice as ugly. @DON in VA

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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Or not.

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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Solo shot from Salty here.

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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Who's at work? Anyone?

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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Like.

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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@Ben (02144) Salty does the leg out to prevent the yips, I think. Plus he's 6'8".

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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Played, Sideburns. @BrentAnthonisen

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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LOL DEFENCE

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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And super-tanned. @Nan

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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Aux barricades, mes braves.

3 years, 3 months ago on Welcome To Surviving Grady: Season Eight

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Sheds a tear and raises a beer (well, gin and tonic, hence the unwonted display of emotion because I'm so flipping stoic just ask Trot's Hat never cried in her goat's cheese while talking about my Dad also it's Spring so there's all that pollen in the air or something).

The fair, I say we keep it.

3 years, 3 months ago on Best Opening Day Ever

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I, meanwhile, am playing with mouse honey. @Sharpie

3 years, 3 months ago on The Next Big Opening Day Thing

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Bad guys win. And do a dickish little dance in centre field.

3 years, 3 months ago on An Early Preview of Beatdowns to Come?

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6-3. Need a Mo meltdown.

3 years, 3 months ago on An Early Preview of Beatdowns to Come?

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5-3. Tigers bullpen uninspiring.

3 years, 3 months ago on An Early Preview of Beatdowns to Come?

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Granderson hit one a mile. 4-3 Yankees.

3 years, 3 months ago on An Early Preview of Beatdowns to Come?

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Swisher got a terrible call. Posada wanted Verlander called for a balk. Ump explained that no-one really understands that rule so he should just let it go. Still 3-3. Here's Joba.

3 years, 3 months ago on An Early Preview of Beatdowns to Come?

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A-Rod embarassed jogging out of the box on a HR that wasn't.

3 years, 3 months ago on An Early Preview of Beatdowns to Come?

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Joba warming. His face like a guilty grey balloon.

3 years, 3 months ago on An Early Preview of Beatdowns to Come?

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Actually he flied out, but I just assumed... Still tied in the Bronx. Jeter still hitless. A-Rod still a reprehensible waste of DNA.

3 years, 3 months ago on An Early Preview of Beatdowns to Come?

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Brandon and his angry Inge doubles towards the gap in left but Avila strikes out to end the threat. Because that's what he does.

3 years, 3 months ago on An Early Preview of Beatdowns to Come?

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Michael Kay just said 'rimming'.

3 years, 3 months ago on An Early Preview of Beatdowns to Come?

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Sweet diving catch from Rayburn denies Ed Hardy aficionado / whore, Russell Martin. Jeter is 0-3. Mysteriously his second inning error has not been recorded as such. News at eleven.

3 years, 3 months ago on An Early Preview of Beatdowns to Come?

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Miguel Cabrera ties the game 3-3 with a sac fly.

3 years, 3 months ago on An Early Preview of Beatdowns to Come?

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I'm working on a ALCS comment count all by myself.

3 years, 3 months ago on An Early Preview of Beatdowns to Come?

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Avila, the Tigers' catcher should be batting eleventh.

3 years, 3 months ago on An Early Preview of Beatdowns to Come?

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Brandon and his angry Inge brings it back to 2-3 MFYs.

3 years, 3 months ago on An Early Preview of Beatdowns to Come?

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Well fuck. 3-run homer from Teixiera.

3 years, 3 months ago on An Early Preview of Beatdowns to Come?

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LOL Jeter Defence costs MFYs first run of the year, driven in by fatface Jhonny P. 0-1 Tigers. Also, Heyward homered. He's on pace to hit 600HR this year.

3 years, 3 months ago on An Early Preview of Beatdowns to Come?

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I'm ready like Freddie. Lynn. For those who don't Facebook:-

http://www.mcsweeneys.net/links/norsehistory/lesson8.html

3 years, 3 months ago on An Early Preview of Beatdowns to Come?

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