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@Brenda55 @Toni_M Yes, mostly at school. I used to go to school in a very privileged neighborhood. My school was 70% asian, and 27% white. I think that was the biggest problem. The kids didn't have exposure to races other than white and asian for the most part. It was absurd. Our school did diagnostics tests of the kids to see whther any groups were being left behind and we had to answer a few questions like "are you and english language learner?". One question was "Ethnicity?" and the only options given were "Asian, White, or Other". The school was made of the 1% and it had a very 1% mentality.
Then I moved to a school that is 50% latino 25% black and 15% white. It is far more low income, with 70% of kids coming from low income households. Here the word is thrown about as well, but usually in a different context. Here the kids who use it think it's some kind of joke because they're so used to hearing slurs themselves.
1 year, 11 months ago on My Story: Jumping the Broom with a "White" Boy
@Toni_M @Brenda55 Thanks for the wisdom; the sad thing is that I feel like people my age, especially those who have grown up in a very sheltered atmosphere don't understand how wrong it is to use the n word. I believe that most of the people who do it, do so without true malice; and I certainly do not let it slide when people use such an offensive term - but because of how often I've heard it, I've come to be more forgiving of those who use the word (out of ignorance).
While most people are cowed into no longer using the term when I scold them about it, many reply that they feel like using the word is ok because many black comedians and musicians use it. I repeatedly tell them that the fact that black people use the word in art or comedy does not justify it's use in everyday conversation, particularly by non-black people.
The people most likely to use the term with no real malice but without shame are those who are extremely ignorant about how deleterious racism has been in this country's past and how it still is a negative and highly present force today.
And I'm not sure I was clear on this, but I meant to say that it is typically non-black people who say I am not black. Black people are generally surprised but very accepting of the fact that I'm black.
And I know it may sound like I don't respect myself if I still consider people who have called me a n*gger friends, but I have not resigned myself to disrespect. People make jokes in poor taste all the time, and while I would never date someone who had used this term about me or about someone else, I realize that most people, when using this term in a "joking" fashion are truly just acting stupidly and without knowledge that what they are saying is wrong.
I am 17, the product of an interracial marriage. My mom is black and my dad is white. NOBODY has ever guessed that I'm black without me telling them (I have light brown hair, pale olive skin and blue eyes). Because I look white but am black, people sometimes think it's funny or acceptable to call me the n-word. People have used that word against me so many times that I've lost count. The sad thing is that most of the time it's used by my ignorant non-black friends who think that they can use that word as some kind of a joke. It disappoints me every time I hear that word used by someone who I otherwise respect, but I've come to accept it as a part of life.
At the same time as having to deal with the flippant use of the n-word by those around me about me, I have to deal with just as many people telling me "you're not black". So many people tell me that I'm not black and they say it in such a way that it sounds like they're telling me "you're not allowed to consider yourself black."
I have never heard anyone black say either of these things before (although one black friend jokingly calls me a cracker).
Anyways, I have never dated a white guy. For whatever reason I feel uncomfortable around them. I have dated an Asian guy, a Middle eastern guy and two half black guys. I always get looks whenever I go out with a guy. Even though I live in Los Angeles and it's 2012, apparently interracial dating is still mind boggling to most people, ethnic or otherwise.The funny thing is that people still think I'm interracially dating when I go out with half black guys when really I'm dating the closest thing to my race...that seems to throw some people, even if they know I'm half black.