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don’t know about ya’ll, but I think these shared values and priorities are crucial to a successful, happy relationship.


I agree and too, seek a mate who wants to explore the world beyond the borders.   So no, you are not being " picky". BTW,that couple looks really happy.

2 days, 11 hours ago on The Travel Bug and Why I’m Okay With Being “Too Picky”

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@trinigirl1 Submission from a woman is not a right you are entitled by virtue of having a penis but compliance you have earned through love, honor, respect, devotion and hard work.


This X 1000.


I have observed many men, especially those in traditional black churches believe submission from a woman without reciprocation is a God given right of theirs......My ex included.  He and his ilk are just parasites needing a host to take all the abuse they put us through. For some reason he never understood if he loved me like Christ loved his bride ( the church), I would have gladly submitted.

4 days, 10 hours ago on Epic Responses to Dumb A** Video Claiming Black Women are More Submissive to White Men

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This is such a cute story. I'm glad BB&W tentacles are reaching far and wide globally.

5 days, 2 hours ago on Continued Victory…Our Voice is Being Heard Worldwide!

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@sunflowerraven Orange makeup looks breathtaking on Brown skin.



AGREED!!

1 week, 2 days ago on Orange (Makeup) Is the New Black: Quick Skin Prep, Tutorial and Products to Try

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I haven't really followed this story. I'm so over narcissistic professional athletes and their problems with the law due to poor choices. I feel badly for his child who will have to become familiar with a father imprisoned behind bars.

BTW, his girlfriend favours Sanaa Lathan.

1 week, 4 days ago on Aaron Hernandez Gets Life, and What a Freaking Fail.

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n his insecure mind and because he is obsessed with bw/wm he is upset to see your relationship. He knows that in this country white men have more status and privilege then bm and ww.

This!!!!

This is what I suspected when I read his unsolicited opinion of her hair. He's jealous of her relationship with her "white" husband. He's no friend.

2 weeks, 1 day ago on What Black Men Think of Natural Hair : “The Ish Don’t Move…”

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Absolutely!

2 weeks, 2 days ago on Open Thread: White guys and why we dig them.

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I'm gushing lol

2 weeks, 2 days ago on Open Thread: White guys and why we dig them.

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I follow them when Toni post on Google plus. Another successful love story. YES!!!

2 weeks, 2 days ago on Toni and Jay – Patience, Love and Respect

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@EarthJeff and I never tire looking at your beautiful faces. 

2 weeks, 2 days ago on Open Thread: White guys and why we dig them.

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@juleah Wow, you both are stunning.

2 weeks, 2 days ago on Open Thread: White guys and why we dig them.

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@Peaceluv_nDOPE Yes he's gorgeous and so are you!

2 weeks, 2 days ago on Open Thread: White guys and why we dig them.

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@Neil Marsden what a lovely couple.

2 weeks, 2 days ago on Open Thread: White guys and why we dig them.

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Okay, I guess I'll go first.  Something that I didn't realize until lately....but when white men have high cheekbones and the sun lightly burns them.  I have this compunction to walk up to them to softly kiss their cheekbones.  A sexy blue eye paramedic I work with slightly sunburned his cheekbones and It's like O.M.G.!!

2 weeks, 3 days ago on Open Thread: White guys and why we dig them.

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A great video wonderfully done! Kudos to both ladies.

1 month ago on Cute Cheschleigh Video Explains Privilege Like You’re a Six-Year-Old

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@onmywayup @PaoloP  "She is not happy unless she is unhappy about something "her people" are undergoing. "


I've known many black people like this and I gave them wide berth.

1 month ago on Why Are “Struggle Discussions” Always More Important Than Anything Else?

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@offbyheartstyle  "because of the unapologetic love and support BW receive here and the whole self love movement focus. "


This right here ......is why I enjoy reading the blog daily as well.



1 month, 2 weeks ago on On Vetting: Beware of “I Can’t Find a Black Woman!” Men. They’re Full of It.

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This article made my heart leap with joy. I'm in the over Forty crowd and so glad to see an over Forty couple featured. It gives me hope. Beautiful couple and story.

1 month, 3 weeks ago on Jeff and Renée – A Relationship That Was Worth One Last Look

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@Brenda55 @mzsunshine hehe, my point is as the only black female at my site I've noticed a lot of attention, something that would have gone over my head years ago before I found BBW.  


It's been said on this site more times than I can count how black women are admired and desired but we miss the signs because either we've been conditioned to or the signs are so subtle especially with white men.


For so long in my younger years, I hated my lips and body because the white students in high school made fun of them. I remember a white girl asking why do black girls have such big butts...just like the scene in Sir Mix-a-lot's video. I recalled being so conscious of my hips in my bathing suit while working to get my lifeguard certification that I tried my darnest to hide behind the rest of participants.. I had internalized what the girl told me about having a big butt and it contributed to a poor body image.  It wasn't until I got to college when I was admired for my physique. A white guy came and whispered in my ear "why do black girls have such nice asses?" My white roommates asked me what he whispered, they must have seen my startled look. It didn't want to tell them for fear of hurting thier feelings(not so sure they would have afforded me the same courtesy, if it was the other way around).


So, I was trying to convey that as black women, we are admired for our beauty and femininity even though you wouldn't think so with what Madison Avenue keeps showcasing.


As far as being a guy-magnet, I'm  not so sure. My goal is to be a husband-magnet!



1 month, 4 weeks ago on Zara: Eight Reasons Why We Love Black Women

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Great article, and I believe it answers a question, I've been pondering lately. Why do many of the men I work with feel the need to touch me (wm). Let me explain. It isn't inappropriate, at least not to me. The guy in Registration department swats at me with a paper and jokingly tells me I'm slacking in my duties. Any chance he gets, he walks by my mobile computer and shuffle the papers smiling all the while he does. One paramedic the other day lightly grabbed my shoulders, and leaned into my to tell me something funny. The other paramedic playfully pokes me in the side and just smiles. Once when I was shivering from the air being so cold, the hot blue-eyed paramedic offered to get a blanket and drape it over my shoulder. I declined, but sensed he wanted to do the draping. Some may considered this inappropriate but they aren't saying anything salacious or lewd when touching me. I'm not getting any bad vibes from them just that they find a reason to come in contact with me during various times of the day. I also have observed that men can be more playful than women at times. 


After reading this article, I've concluded it must be they're attracted to ALL the reasons listed that make me unique as a black woman. Yep, it's my final answer and I'm sticking with it.


1 month, 4 weeks ago on Zara: Eight Reasons Why We Love Black Women

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You look gorgeous. I love reds and pinks in lipsticks.

1 month, 4 weeks ago on Mark Jacobs Knows Pink…with “Kiss Kiss Bang Bang!”

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Florida's water is considered "hard" water meaning it has a high mineral content. This leaves a build-up on surfaces including hair, hence I do a ACV rinse every two-three months. It feels soft and squeaky clean, I then apply coconut oil, Olive oil and a Shea Moisture product.

1 month, 4 weeks ago on Home Made Detangler and Shine Enhancer…Apple Cider Vinegar!!

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Well, I've been running/walking 5k at least three times weekly, and I didn't even realize I was running more than three miles until I got my Fitbit. My organization is doing a step challenge ( 10,000 steps a day) for the employees, so I've been motivated to keep active.  I also am trying to manage my sugar intake, though not always successfully, to stay fit and healthy. As they say, you can't out exercise a poor diet.


It's good to know that crossword puzzles keep the brain "fit". At one time I did crosswords daily but for some reason fell off the wagon. Lol. Don't understand the psychology of quitting good habits and  holding onto bad ones.


Anyway, I'm looking forward to being the best me in 2015 but there are definitely challenges ahead.


2 months ago on Four Ways to Be Your Best You

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Great article and for me the best I've enjoyed thus far in 2015. I'm waaay past 40 (wink), so I too am looking for a man who will fit into a life I've already built.


@Public123... I agree wholeheartedly that a youthful nature is valuable and a trait I seek when vetting a man.


Black women's youthful looks are an advantage in the dating arena and we should exploit that privilege to our benefit. 

2 months, 2 weeks ago on Dating Men Over 40: What’s the Big Difference?

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They say it NEVER rains in southern California....they didn't say anything about not snowing. Haha! Enjoy.

3 months, 3 weeks ago on Crazy Snow Day in Southern California!

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In all your dealings with people, don’t forget the importance of having boundaries, of vetting from the start and continuing to vet, and having healthy attachment styles.


Yes!!!  Definitely, something to improve on in 2015.

3 months, 3 weeks ago on The Discipline of Happiness – Being the BEST version of YOU

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@EarthJeff well said, Jeff.

3 months, 4 weeks ago on On Justifying Preferences, and Evolving Preferences…

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@trinigirl1 I wait with bated breath since I enjoy most of your posts. They are quite enlightening.

3 months, 4 weeks ago on On Justifying Preferences, and Evolving Preferences…

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@_Toni_ If I didn't wake all the dead with the laugh I let out just now after reading this, I must have woke at least half.


Oh, it was you who awakened me out of my sleep, I thought I was dreaming. (Smile).

4 months ago on Watch Out for ‘Childmen’ With Pathological Entitlement Issues

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Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!!!

4 months ago on Open Thread: Christmas Wishes

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Wow, I love the first pic of the ladies with the lovely red lips. All the women are gorgeous and dispel many ignorant beliefs of  how African women should look.

4 months, 1 week ago on Sir Loin’s Babe Wednesday: African Beauty Part 2, Of Queens and Crowns

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Very nice story.

4 months, 1 week ago on Christine and Masa – East Meets West

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Wow, pretty in pink. And those lashes make your eyes pop!

4 months, 2 weeks ago on Like What I’m Wearing? Get It for $5 on Hautelook Before Saturday!

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@Leille ! Take their hand when getting out of a car (or rollercoaster :-p)! Let him help you!


Well said. Just the other day at work, I was literally on my hands and knees looking for the reset button on my WOW ( workstation on wheels). An amused male nurse asked what I was doing and then assisted me in locating the very visible reset button right in front of me. He then offered his hand to help me up to my feet. I thought it was one of the most gentlemanly gestures I've seen in a long long time. I took his hand and said thank you. I don't think any of my other male coworkers would have made such an offer.


I LOVE it when men display gentlemanly manners.

4 months, 2 weeks ago on The One Thing that Motivates *Manly* Men…

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I love ruby woo, I get plenty of compliments. I loved to see a pic of your outfit and makeup.

4 months, 3 weeks ago on The Psychology of Red Lips that Make the Guys Go “Meow”

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@Statuesque Some (Black) commenters have also shrugged their shoulders because most of the women have been White and seem to deny the allegations on that basis alone,


The family was talking about the Bill Cosby allegations and my brother n law believes that because the accusers are white women they are not credible. His logic just baffles me.

4 months, 3 weeks ago on The Official Bill Cosby (Alleged) Rape/Rant Thread…

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I had to learn the hard way that Black Hair Care companies don't necessarily care about black people and their hair. The Black Hair Care companies are a business and making money is their number one goal. If using a model sporting 3a,b,c hair sells more product than who does that reflect on? The consumers or the companies?


I use to use a particular black hair product to get my hair bone straight and use this same company's product to dye my hair honey blonde (I wanted the Mary J Blogs look).  Two hair stylists from different regions of the country berated me for using their products saying the product was terrible for black hair! They actually directed me to hair products perceived to be for "white women". So just because it's a black hair care company doesn't mean they will embrace what you embrace regarding the natural hair movement.

4 months, 3 weeks ago on On Selling the Dream of “Good Hair” to Naturalistas…

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