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@Oaktown Paul  @marie_christine2 


It's like these women have Stockholm syndrome.  That or they actually enjoy being publicly humiliated and abused.

3 hours, 45 minutes ago on Listen Ladies! If You’re Going to Complain About How “Black Men Hate You” While Scoffing at Expanding Your Options…Then You’re Just Begging.

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@trinigirl1 @Gijou 


What's more pathetic is black men suddenly take interest in a black woman if white men find her attractive.  It's like the thought process is "The white gods find her attractive, she must be worth it".

3 hours, 47 minutes ago on Listen Ladies! If You’re Going to Complain About How “Black Men Hate You” While Scoffing at Expanding Your Options…Then You’re Just Begging.

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I always say this but you deserve someone who thinks you're the bees knees and vice versa. That man could be black, but he could also be Asian, Latino, or White. You should be with someone who reciprocates your love and respect, they should enjoy you and want to spend time with you.  You should not be with someone who just "tolerates" you. 

3 hours, 51 minutes ago on Listen Ladies! If You’re Going to Complain About How “Black Men Hate You” While Scoffing at Expanding Your Options…Then You’re Just Begging.

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@The Working Home Keeper  A recipe section would be nice, I like cooking, I'm learning to make homemade bread this week.

2 days ago on Open Thread: Brainstorm Session -The Forum

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Can there be a careers section? For people changing careers, working in hybrid careers, career advice and dress tips etc.


Also maybe a tech sub forum in the entrepreneur section.  I am trying my hand at freelance web design(I live in an area where there are literally no tech jobs and have decided to make my own) and would like to talk to other tech geeks.

2 days, 3 hours ago on Open Thread: Brainstorm Session -The Forum

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How long will this be open?  I won't have money to spare until Tuesday.

4 days ago on We Broke $5,000 in just THREE Days! Get Your “Troll Tears” Sippy Cup Today!

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@SirLoinDeBeef @thecrazyartist 

LMAO.

Yeah, but those guys are usually not given a pass

4 days, 22 hours ago on Young Girl Needs Our Guidance: 15 Year-Old-Girl, Only Interested in Men 26-50.

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@kennaGransberg @thecrazyartist  I know, said guy is now in his early 30's and is still doing the same things he was 9 years ago. I never dated him(my parents would have freaked out), but I did regret not taking up his offer for a while.  I am still quite sheltered and a little naïve(I am 23 now), but over the past nine years I have really grown as a person and matured.  All I can think is "how was I so dumb back then?".  Back then I just thought it was cool he had a car!

5 days, 2 hours ago on Young Girl Needs Our Guidance: 15 Year-Old-Girl, Only Interested in Men 26-50.

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@kennaGransberg 


I had a huge crush on one of my friends older brothers when I was 14.  I never fully acted on it or dated him, but he made it clear he was more than willing to give it a shot.  He was 22, looking back on it I wonder what I ever saw in him.  He was very good-looking and as a hormone riddled 14 year old I probably failed to see past that. 

5 days, 2 hours ago on Young Girl Needs Our Guidance: 15 Year-Old-Girl, Only Interested in Men 26-50.

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Let me start by saying I can feel where the author is coming from.  When I was in my teens I wanted nothing to do with teen boys.  I liked men in their 20's, but the key thing here was I knew most decent attractive men in their 20's would not date me, and the losers that I wanted nothing to do with  were more than willing to give it a shot. A friends older brother was interested but I never acted on it, he was GORGEOUS, but I soon realized all he had was his looks.  Looking back on it I wonder why a 22 year old was hanging out with a bunch of 9th graders.  A lot of men will try to take advantage of you, especially at your age.  Some men even purposefully seek out much younger, naïve women as a control issue.  There may be some personality defects on his part that a woman his own age might not be willing to tolerate.


My advice would be to enjoy being a teenager, it's the only time in life where you can act a complete fool and be given a pass. I would wait until you are 18 to consider dating an older man(say around 23-26), and wait until you are 21 to try a May-December romance.

5 days, 2 hours ago on Young Girl Needs Our Guidance: 15 Year-Old-Girl, Only Interested in Men 26-50.

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Let's see who is doing this:

Disgruntled white women

Ride or die black women

Disgruntled black men


I think it's time we made our own forum.  I am donating.

6 days, 4 hours ago on Beyond Black & White Fan Page is Under Attack Again. Time to Go to War.

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Does Steve Harvey ever discuss why two of his marriages failed? Or is he one of those guys that blames the ex-wife for everything?

6 days, 18 hours ago on Steve Harvey Has a New Dating Websites Aimed at ‘Teaching Women to be more DATEABLE’

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@Tempaccount @idahjennings920 @thecrazyartist 


I bet this chick was like "he's a music producer, he can put me ON and help my career if I have his baby".

1 week ago on The Iyanla Vanzant Cluster Cuss: We BB&W MUST Keep Discussing the High OOW Rate

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This passage really summed up the whole cluster cuss:


"Now, my father has been refined. He has received the validation that he always hoped for. He now gets to be the poster child, the voice of all of the “rolling stones” across the country. He even goes as far as to apologize on behalf of all of the men who have wronged the women who have been victimized, or better yet in this case womanized. Yes, now he has found himself and his “calling” in life, all because he has been allowed to blame his parents for why he made the decisions that he made. Yet he has 34 children out there, with NO true representation of a Father, no voice, going out into the world after being told to just get over it and figure it out. So I ask again, what about “us”?
Yes, what about “us”, the countless children growing up “Daddy-less,” because our Fathers are more horny than they are proactive, more selfish than they were in love, and more of a barnacle than they were “generous” to finish the never-ending job of being a parent. "


This is exactly what the problem is, people will blame everyone and everything but themselves for the mess they have created. 

This whole thing is deep, I will be back later with more thoughts.


And correct me if I am wrong but did I just read that baby number 35 is on the way?  What kind of thirsty broad would willingly join in on this kind of f*ckery? 


1 week ago on The Iyanla Vanzant Cluster Cuss: We BB&W MUST Keep Discussing the High OOW Rate

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@Statuesque  That is a good point, it could be political, here is a list of upcoming Michigan elections:

http://ballotpedia.org/Michigan_elections,_2014



1 week, 2 days ago on The Death of Beyond Black & White…

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@ole'skool  Maybe a landing page of sorts that expresses our goals and "pitches" our product?

1 week, 2 days ago on Open Forum: Community Brainstorm Session

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@Tempaccount @Brenda55 @sagevanity  I'm for hire as well if you need a forum mod


1 week, 2 days ago on The Death of Beyond Black & White…

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The fact that you have so many haters is just proof what you are doing is actually impacting people. If you were insignificant then these people would not go out of their way to destroy you. Over the last 3-4 years you have ruffled a lot of feathers and pissed off a lot of people.  It's clear that some people feel threatened and want to silence you.


Keep your head up, we will rebuild this, we are rooting for you.

1 week, 3 days ago on The Death of Beyond Black & White…

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@Daisy_inthe_Field 

Again I class these as "ride or die chicks".  WW can be ride or dies too.

1 week, 3 days ago on The Death of Beyond Black & White…

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@Christelyn  @SwirlQueen 


I have a pretty good idea who probably took offence:


Disgruntled Blackistanis

Black "intellectuals"

Ride or Die Chicks

Disgruntled MRA's and PUA's who think women don't have a right to reject a man


In other words the usual suspects.

1 week, 3 days ago on The Death of Beyond Black & White…

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The more I think about this the angrier I get, blackistan could give a shit about black on black violence and the hundreds of black women and children attacked daily, but they will take the time out of their day to make sure a facebook page gets shut down.  Pathetic.

1 week, 3 days ago on The Death of Beyond Black & White…

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@LadyHumor  Girl, you KNOW that black women also had a hand in this. Ride or die chicks are the worst.


1 week, 3 days ago on The Death of Beyond Black & White…

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My heart skipped a beat, for a minute I thought you were closing up shop.


I am a gymnastics fan, have yall seen this?  I watched it on TV!

http://news.yahoo.com/us-gymnast-simone-biles-retains-world-around-title-131925111.html

1 week, 3 days ago on The Death of Beyond Black & White…

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@Chicago404  If I see another "Beyoncé and Nicki are sexual and bad for feminism!!!" article I think I might puke. 


White feminist promote expressing female sexuality and will defend raunchy white entertainers until they are blue in the face, but when a black entertainer does it then it is suddenly an affront to feminism and hurting the "movement". 


White feminist are all for white women being well-educated stay at home moms, but when a black woman does it then she is "hurting the movement" and "abandoning her duties".


White women can run homemaking empires and still be feminist, when a black woman does the same or tries to do the same then she is "endorsing the patriarchy".


Basically black women are used as foot soldiers for feminist causes.  Their needs concerns and freedom get in the way of the needs concerns and freedoms of white feminist.  It's basically the same as blackistan's use of black women.

1 week, 4 days ago on Cop allegedly sexually assaults eight Black women – where are the women’s groups?

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@Swirlgirl28  Yup, it's sad that it came to this but I don't feel sorry for these women.  They made their bed and now they have to lie in it.

2 weeks, 2 days ago on A Picture Says 1000 Words…

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@Vivaforever @Christelyn  

SMDH, this is so damn depressing.

2 weeks, 3 days ago on A Picture Says 1000 Words…

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@FriendsofJay  "If you’re a WW and you like a certain WM who seems more interested in BW, how would you go about fighting her? "


It's basically the same argument as "If all of the attractive and quality black women swirl then where does that leave the community?" .  Some white women see attractive and quality white men swirling as some kind of dating pool drain. The real issue here is they might not even be included in the competition pool for some of these men.  If they would rather have a woman of color, and there is no shortage of gorgeous, quality women of color, then they basically have a snowballs chance in hell.


I know women who think that just being white and blonde means that they are already the first pick for most guys, since that is no longer true some women are having a hard time coping.

2 weeks, 3 days ago on Video: Are Black Women Who Swirl a THREAT to White Women?

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@CindyMiles  Co-sign, some people need to learn that they do not run the lives of others.

2 weeks, 3 days ago on Video: Are Black Women Who Swirl a THREAT to White Women?

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Not all white women feel this way, in fact I would say most don't, but there are enough out there that do to warrant a discussion.  I think the problem is that some(not all) white women do not like seeing an attractive, high-value white man with a black woman.  Some women see it as "poaching" the best men.


Lets not forget that there is a certain subset of white women who are truly deluded about their looks in relation to other women.  For example I have an acquaintance who had a hard time coping when a guy she has had her eye on for three years revealed he prefers women of color.  The guy is gorgeous and has a hint of an accent(he came here from Wales when he was about 12 or so).  This woman is overweight and average in terms of looks, yet she still feels she is more attractive than the women he liked simply because she is white.  I was not shocked because even though she is quite liberal she has made some pretty shady/questionable statements during my conversations with her. We often forget women can be pretty foul towards each other when it comes to securing a mate.

2 weeks, 4 days ago on Video: Are Black Women Who Swirl a THREAT to White Women?

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The guys that claim to be uber religious always get a side eye from me.  Anyone who boasts that they are the most faithful to God constantly are doing it so others admire them, not because they are truly in communion with the Lord.  I know plenty of "Men of God" of all races who passed up women who were devout and involved in the church in favor of women who were more liberal religiously because they were prettier/better arm candy.  Same Guys then went on to complain that their new wife wasn't modest enough or devout enough.


I am also aware of white men who think black women are desperate and willing to put up with all kinds of mess just to be with a man who has a job.  These men are usually shocked when black women have standards.  I also hate it when fools blame feminism and the government for problems in their lives that they created.  I am not a feminist, and I am all for limited government, but Susan B Anthony and Uncle Sam did not put a gun to your head and force you to sleep with those women.  Take responsibility, your lack of accountability is why warning labels are now 50 pages long and why taxpayers have to continue to clean up after you.


As for the man with his head buried in the sand: Ignorance is bliss.


SMDH

2 weeks, 5 days ago on Three men who say they are “good.” Three types of men black women should stay the hell away from.

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This is what I always wondered, and at times I think the media uses domestic violence to push an agenda, because it's not about the victims after a certain point. 


Part of the problem is it's 2014 and society still as a hard time dealing with the idea that women have agency. Even when we do something normal like swirling people automatically think we are either fed-up baby mama's or brainwashed self haters, the idea of us just liking men of other races because we can never crosses anyone's mind.  If we want to be stay at home moms then we are brainwashed by the patriarchy and gender roles.  If we want to be childfree then we are brainwashed by feminism.  The idea that women are adults who do things because they can and want to still bothers people.  This is why anytime a woman does something awful the excuses begin to roll in.  It's not acceptable for a 35 year old male pedophile teacher to sleep with a female student, so it should not be acceptable for a 35 year old female pedophile to do the same.  The excuse of "oh she was lonely and confused" needs to stop, that woman is a sexual predator.  I don't believe in hitting someone unless it is self defense, what Hope Solo did is no different than what Adrian Peterson or Ray Rice did. 

2 weeks, 5 days ago on Do We Give Female Domestic Violence Abusers a Pass?

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@jazzyfae45  Black women no longer being on the bottom of the "totem pole" is really pissing some people off.  The fact is the over the last 5 years we have managed to undo a LOT of damage that was done to our image.  It's happened so quickly that it is making heads spin.  People now see that good plot+good acting=success, the color of the actress doesn't matter as long as she can deliver, and that is upsetting a lot of people.

3 weeks, 1 day ago on People Magazine Shows Racial Shade During Shonda Rhimes Big Network Television Night

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@ChristieRJohnson @LovelyLulu @Brenda55 


I was a bit of a rebel in junior high and highschool, and honestly did not give a flip over what others thought of me , I didn't care if people thought me skipping school danced and preferring shakespeare to twilight were "weird".  I didn't care if the other black girls found Omarion hot while I preferred Keanu Reeved, I didn't care that dressing in all black and listening to Korn was "scary" to my classmates, and this "disturbed" my parents.  They called it "selfish" and "destructive".  Now at 23 I am beginning to realize that my utter disregard to how others viewed me was one of my better qualities.  I was not hurting anyone, and I was happy.  I am more mature now, I think compassion and concern for others are good qualities, but screw living life trying to appease everyone else. 


Black women need to start reaching out and claiming their right to a happy life.  I am now attempting to sell themes and templates on themeforest to supplement income and build experience.  I have already set the goal of landing my dream job and moving within 6 months, I WILL achieve this.  You know what others said?  "Sometimes you need to scale back, that goal is too lofty and freelancing at 23 is just absurd".  I just nod and brush them off.

3 weeks, 1 day ago on Wake Up, Black Women! IRR “Permission” Is Never Coming!

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@oekmama  One of the more recent troll fest was aimed at Zelda Williams, Robin Williams daughter.  People were tweeting pictures of nooses and all kinds of ish.

3 weeks, 3 days ago on The Nation of Social Media Hate Comes for Omari Hardwick’s Wife….

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@Tempaccount  I saw the Vanessa story yesterday, they make a nice looking couple!

3 weeks, 3 days ago on The Nation of Social Media Hate Comes for Omari Hardwick’s Wife….

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People need to grow the hell up and get on with their lives.  The usual haters decided to be petty and go in on a woman who isn't even in the spotlight because she doesn't fit their definition of a "bad bitch", and the NBABM crowd decided this was the perfect opportunity to get the black male attention they so desperately crave and joined in.  I hate seeing people act like this, character over color, it's 2014 get lives people.


Pathetic ass cretins.

3 weeks, 3 days ago on The Nation of Social Media Hate Comes for Omari Hardwick’s Wife….

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@Swirlgirl28 @Christelyn  @Justme65 @International_Responder 


I'm 23 and I have men like this hit on me all the time.  40+, overweight, and bitter.  They also have the nerve to think I somehow "owe" them attention because they are "wiser and more experienced" than their 20's and early 30's counterparts. I can't tell you how many times I have heard men over 45 say they refuse to consider a woman over 28.

3 weeks, 5 days ago on Black Man Admits Hood Dudes Corrupt Black Women’s Wombs Through Sabotage, But Stops Short on “Swirling” Option

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@Lisa_Lisa @thecrazyartist  Again that is why I say 50%, some women are willing to sleep with these men so they are also part of the problem.  Women need to vet their partners, but some men take the "I was trapped by an evil woman" meme too far, when they are the ones sabotaging and/or ignoring birth control as well.


I just can't feel sorry for any grown man that didn't want to be a father, yet refused to wear protection.

3 weeks, 5 days ago on Black Man Admits Hood Dudes Corrupt Black Women’s Wombs Through Sabotage, But Stops Short on “Swirling” Option

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A lot of people like to think that men are really just innocent overgrown boys who were tricked into becoming a baby daddy by an evil banshee who set a birth control free trap with her vagina.  They refuse to admit that they are 50% of the problem, some of them even caused this problem by refusing to wear condoms or sabotaging birth control.  They refuse to take responsibility as adults.


What really kills me is a ton of the men who refuse to date a single mom are card carrying members of the Bitter Divorcee Brigade(TM) and/or the Baby Daddy Brigade(TM).  If a childless man didn't want to date a single mom then I could understand that, I am childless and 23, so why the hell would I want to help raise another woman's child? The guy would have to be pretty special.  It's when these men come up with all kinds of messed up excuses as to why it's OK for a man to sire multiple out of wedlock and expect/feel entitled to marry a much younger, childless and inexperienced woman with no baggage, all while failing to realize that they are damaged goods themselves.


The bitter divorcee is just as bad, these men need help and need to work through their issues.  Trust me, your new lady will be willing to help you, but if your bitter attitude is a constant 24/7 issue and you have no intention of fixing it she will leave.


3 weeks, 6 days ago on Black Man Admits Hood Dudes Corrupt Black Women’s Wombs Through Sabotage, But Stops Short on “Swirling” Option

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@cns @Rubywoo23  WTF is wrong with some women? Prince charming came in on a horse and she managed to blow him off.  I can see young girls doing this but a 38 year old woman? Really? For a guy that wants nothing to do with you?

3 weeks, 6 days ago on Black Man Admits Hood Dudes Corrupt Black Women’s Wombs Through Sabotage, But Stops Short on “Swirling” Option

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I hate to say it but this is why I tend to stay out of any police brutality/police racism discussions.  Time and again it has been shown that the purported victim was doing something wrong or a routine traffic stop went awry.


Crap like this just pisses me off, it takes away from actual cases of police brutality and abuse.

4 weeks, 1 day ago on Yes; Daniele Watts Should Apologize for Crying Wolf.

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@_Toni_  I noticed this too, as black women gain more visibility the attacks increase.  I also noticed the "strategy" for the attacks is changing.  Five years ago it was more in your face and childish because that is what people could get away with.  Since "black women are hideous, disgusting heifers that no one wants" is no longer tolerated, people have moved on to a more subtle, pseudo-intellectual and concern troll-esque style of attack. It's not as in your face and it's packaged in such a way that it appears to be intellectual.  In other words Alessandra Stanley and her ilk have learned how to polish turds.  It reminds me of the "Lupita is a fetish"  derailment during awards season.  People tried to paint it as "concern" because the evil white media was fetishizing her by giving her recognition.


Since this woman now knows that the target(Shonda Rimes) is aware of the tactics she is using, she will move on to what she sees as a more vulnerable target.

1 month ago on Shonda Rhimes Hands NY Times WW Writer Her Hindquarters on Social Media

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@Gijou @itsgoodtobeme @Arabella12 I agree with everyone else but Camilla alves is very pretty, and so are you.  People often confuse "sexy" and "pretty".  I don't consider Camilla Alves "sexy" but she is pretty.


To add to this I have seen many very handsome men married to women who were pretty but not bombshell sexy.  The wives were usually naturally pretty, but didn't dress in a fashion forward way or spend a lot of time on hair or make-up(classic pretty girls dressed down cases).



1 month ago on “Did This White Guy Use Me for Sex?” Yeah; Probably. But Not Because You’re Black.

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I am happy to see this, I like Keke and think she is gorgeous, perfect for Cinderella.  I like fairytales and I like that Cinderella gets her prince in the end.  It shows that black women are worthy and the ending does not need to be altered.  Love it!


OT:  Have you all heard of Misty Copeland? She is an ABT dancer and will be leading as Odette/Odile in Swan Lake.  I love seeing black women in the arts, it is a nice departure from the booty shaking rap girl we see so often.

http://2paragraphs.com/2014/08/misty-copeland-first-african-american-ballerina-in-abt-swan-lake-lead/

1 month ago on First Photos of Keke Palmer Playing Cinderella on Broadway!

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@onmywayup @Arabella12 @SacLove76 

This goes into ideas about white supremacy and beauty standards, but people fail to realize that white and blonde is still the idea of a trophy wife.  Many people will not see a black woman as a trophy wife simply because she is black.  Looks really have little to do with it.  White supremacist beauty standards dictate that a black woman will always be seen as less beautiful than the white woman, no matter how attractive the black woman is.  Do not think for one minute that a handsome white man with a black woman regardless of how pretty the woman is, is not going to get the "why is he with her?" question.  People are not overt with this, but it is not uncommon. 


We also do not know what the author looks like so making this assumption is a little out there.

1 month, 1 week ago on “Did This White Guy Use Me for Sex?” Yeah; Probably. But Not Because You’re Black.

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@CharlesCaptainBlesi 


I'm happy to hear things worked out for you and your wife, but I politely have to disagree about "testing" commitment.  I am not jumping through hoops for anyone, there are just other fish in the sea.  I find the idea too stressful and tend to show people the door swiftly.  It's great if it works out for other people, but not everyone is willing to put up with this sort of tactic. 

1 month, 1 week ago on “Did This White Guy Use Me for Sex?” Yeah; Probably. But Not Because You’re Black.

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@SweetGardenia @KKendall 


Men don't care about your looks as much when you are just a booty call.  This guy clearly had no intention of taking her around his friends and family and probably just wanted more sex.  A study also shows that men drop a lot of their ideal standards when they just want sex.  Personality, appearance and quality of individual go out of the window, they are just hooking up, all that matters is the sex is good.  He is not out to get to know you, that is the difference between a booty call site and dating site.  With a booty call site you know right from the beginning that it is just going to be sex.  It wasn't because she was "playing games", he probably just moved on to the next one in the meantime. 


Some men have a library full of women they know they can have no strings attached sex with.  They usually call them or text them when they need some sexy time. The author should have realized this and moved on sooner. 

1 month, 1 week ago on “Did This White Guy Use Me for Sex?” Yeah; Probably. But Not Because You’re Black.

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@docwatson223 @dani-BBW  Divorce, alimony and kids are the reason I am not as keen to date a man in his 40's.  Just too much baggage to deal with.

1 month, 1 week ago on Ask a White Guy: Older Men, Younger Women?

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@SirLoinDeBeef @lindsaynagle  I look young too(most people guess 18-19 but I am 23 soon to be 24), people have told me though that they know I am older as soon as I open my mouth. I just don't "sound like a kid".  True story, I have had old weirdos lose interest as soon as the conversation started. When I wasn't as impressed as they thought I would be, I heard one guy mutter "she must just be a really young looking 30, she has no bubbliness and standards are just too high for her to be a teen or even early 20's".

1 month, 1 week ago on Ask a White Guy: Older Men, Younger Women?

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