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@ThtsaPaddlin @Mike Petriello @Guitar DINGERS!!!
Oh, wait... not my line
1 week, 2 days ago on 2014 Dodgers In Review: OF Andre Ethier
Ethier: 2014 OBP: .322, Avg: .249
almost exactly Rollins' 2014 line
But I would much rather see someone who doesn't play shortstop like a retirement home candidate than
well, you know...
@SkepticNinja @SabrDodgers @LiterallyPFP Pssshhhh
The postseason is just a huge crapshoot. You might need even just one "really good" pitcher.
1 week, 2 days ago on A deeper look at Howie Kendrick, Dee Gordon’s replacement
@capnsparrow "LAUGH ALL YOU WANT
AH'M THE ONE WHO'S GONNA BE ON TAY-VAY, LOOKIn' ALL BUFF"
1 week, 3 days ago on So Long, Matt Kemp
@DKD OBP is king with the new crowd
Aahhhh luuv yew gaaaahs
@Paul ran out of puns, is just Paul now ..............Ned wasn't all that bad.
1 week, 4 days ago on So Long, Matt Kemp
@itsthatguywhodoesstuff Remember when Javier Lopez was the big-shit offensive catcher for the Braves, yet Greg Maddux always wanted Eddie Lopez?
something like that
"I know everyone is in a state of mourning over an athlete that none of us know personally being traded"
Actually, I've spoken to Matt so often in spring training that I *do* feel like I know him personally.
We aren't friends, but...
Many people who frequent the Arizona camp can say the same thing.
Bless you, Matt. You are a good man.
We've lost two very good *human beings* in the last few days (regardless of my opinion about whether these trades were good- and I do).
@Bill Grabarkewitz @Guitar Kemp is awesome as well, but I think that privately he wants to get off this team. So...
1 week, 4 days ago on Dodgers acquire Howie Kendrick from Angels, what is life?
I will miss the hell out of Dee, man. Damn.
He and Andre were my two favorite personalities on the team-- just good dudes.
@juanhenry "defense becomes unbearable"
Hell, DH is the ONLY place for him
4 weeks ago on Report: Hanley Ramirez to sign with Red Sox
I didn't know that the Sox were straight up morons. lmfao
this will be absolutely disastrous for them
@DroogyDodger @Guitar water
1 month ago on Jimmy Rollins should be on Dodgers’ radar for shortstop
@Dodgers Nerd Apparently there are still grown men who can't spell "America."
@TheOcelot @Subtle Euphemism aka Jonathan Lingo @Purple Drank
DETROIT VERSUS EVERYBODY
to return to that Bill Cosby thing and "don't have heroes" or whatever
one of my comedy heroes went way too hard on me during his crowd work recently with just malicious, hacky shit
so I'm done with having heroes in comedy
and I'm ready to punch that guy in the face
1 month ago on 2014 Dodgers in Review: 2B Dee Gordon
@BIah @Guitar doing a play on "all y'all n......s be trippin'"
SHEEEEIIIIIIIIIIIITTTT, ALL Y'ALL
African American gentlemen
maintaining your balance quite well.
@MFYG IN OTHER NEWS: clouds are generally puffy white things..... just boring, predictable shiz
1 month, 1 week ago on Clayton Kershaw, Most Valuable Everything
@brincon @Guitar I knew the guy who banned him (Tommy) fairly well
When Tommy got fired a few months ago Rogan and The Store felt that a reunion was in order.
@brincon @Guitar calling out Mencia's theft of jokes
So Joe Rogan will make his return to The Comedy Store after a ban of 7 years....
slowly realizing that I'm one of the few people who actually cares
@BIah If it goes anything like it did for me when I was your age....
1 month, 1 week ago on Dodgers Reportedly Add Three More To Front Office: Bream, Carr, Finley
@moneynow27 I don't want Ethier to go
Detroit vers everrrrrrbaaawdy
Brian Wilson (the legendary musician, not the shitty reliever) followers: 32,000
Taylor Swift: 46.5 million
We live in Hell, folks.
1 month, 1 week ago on Hanley Ramirez Declines Qualifying Offer, Obviously
@Harry Twater pretty most
Prince is perhaps the most underrated guitarist of our time.
@KMT59 I wonder if he is a boy dog
I've noticed that only strangers' female dogs bury their faces in my crotch within moments of meeting me. I wish that human women were as aggressive.
1 month, 1 week ago on Of Course The Dodgers Are Trying To Trade An Outfielder
"Dad drove a stock car to an early death
All I remember is a drunk man's breath
'Ain't livin' long like this'"
@HunterStricklandsOedipalComplex @Guitar @LiterallyPFP k, I can dig it
now that I looked at their salary numbers, you guys are right to complain about him, BUT
1 month, 2 weeks ago on All Hail The Mighty New Dodgers Front Office
@Diane. Author of Ned Colletti erotic fan fiction p AAAAAaaaaaAAAWwwwwwWWWW SHIT
@Diane. Author of Ned Colletti erotic fan fiction p #NoNBA
sowwy. KINGS (in HOCKEY) 4 LYFE
@Diane. Author of Ned Colletti erotic fan fiction p just read "Kings dynasty" then wrote "HELL YEAH" or something realized that you were probably referring to some NBA team that I wouldn't care about even if it brought me out of a coma
@LiterallyPFP You guys go on
To me, Andruw Jones was IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINIFINTELY
@Jeremy_N @Guitar @GinFizzBear yeah, it's the same with interleague crap-- they're just raking it in, so the "temporary"
1 month, 2 weeks ago on Gabe Kapler reportedly hired as Farm Director, front office shuffle continues
@GinFizzBear @Guitar Well, let's just say that I would limit the number of teams that would be in the playoffs. There might even be 2 divisions again with 4 SUBdivisions (to prevent teams from flying all around the country all the time) in each league, but only two would make it into the playoffs.
The way the postseason in baseball is structured.... it's a joke.
Who the hell thought that the Giants were the best team in baseball or anywhere near it?
Jesus. The whole thing needs to be restructured.
@Purple Drank @ABSmileBunch @DodgerDodger Papa Drank... Mama Drank... and their little baby
it's all so....................... Kaufmanesque
@Weston T @Guitar @SabrDodgers great alcohol chat... we need to do this more often... gotta exercise now
1 month, 2 weeks ago on Report: Dodgers Interested in Alexei Ramirez
@Weston T @SabrDodgers I drank Jameson until it literally started hurting my insides when I consumed it. I kinda figured my body was telling me something.
@SabrDodgers I didn't start drinking *consistently* until I began comedy 4 years ago.
The first time I ever got really shit faced was when I was 29 and going to film school classes.
I drank 12 Guineses because a hot Mexican girl rejected me. I thought, "these kids are going to notice that I'm more than slightly buzzed here." Nope. No noticed or gave a shit.
Oh, what were we talking about? Yeah, I can tell the difference between liquors.
1 month, 2 weeks ago on 2014 Dodgers In Review: Catcher/Relief Ace Drew Butera
The Goat has some credits that I'm just now discovering
No offense to him, but I can see why he kept this one a secret.
1 month, 3 weeks ago on Dodgers decline Chad Billingsley’s option for 2015, but hopefully he returns
@ tomato @Guitar bbl