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@Purple Drank @Guitar https://twitter.com/FrancisMcCourt/status/579319014372945920
1 week ago on Joe Wieland Is Perfectly Acceptable Rotation Depth
@Blue Magic Mike @Guitar Power Rangers premiered on August 28, 1993. We had just moved to Detroit from Georgia, and that date was probably the exact day of my first class there. I was more concerned with stickin' mah wang into a Midwestern girl.
Sorry... tmi, but...I was just older
1 week, 4 days ago on Mailbag #21: Seager/Guzman/LaRoche Comps, Joc Concerns, Dodgers Not Spending?
@Blue Magic Mike there is a definite generational gap between me and Power Rangers fans
@TheConman .............not good form
@Subtle Euphemism Brett was such an underrated badass.
@Purple Drank @Guitar @Weston T I was joking.
3 weeks, 5 days ago on Dodgers Sign Mike Adams to a Minor League Contract
@Weston T @Guitar But I wasn't joking.
going to get my "teeth cleaned" in one hour.... I miss the days when I was younger and it really was a teeth cleaning
now it's more like "inspection to avoid another root canal"
@Weston T Eff that shiz.
Mike Tyson's Punch Out
@Superba @Guitar @Vin_Skully too much pressure, bro
1 month ago on Joel Peralta’s sore shoulder could open Dodgers’ closer spot for others
@Vin_Skully I wonder what the rookies think when Koufax and/or Kershaw and/or Greinke watch them throw-- I sure as hell wouldn't want Jim Gaffigan and Brian Regan watch me perform
@Montgomery Burns hoof, sir.... hoof
this was linked on Yahoo's frontpage from yesterday- don't know if anyone posted it
@TheConman someone told me that I look like him when I wore my Dodgers jersey the other day
and when I'm thin *I do*... a pale version, though
1 month, 1 week ago on 2014 Dodgers In Review: SP Josh Beckett
SNL 40 in 4 (at least on the west si-eeeeeeeeeed)
if you be on da east, dat shit on in 1
@Lobo @Guitar Comedy, brosef.... his mom owns The Store.... keepin' up with the goins-on
He is actually a nice man, too. I've met him three times. Horrible interviewer, nice guy
2 months ago on 2014 Dodgers In Review: RP Jose Dominguez
If you haven't listened to the Pauly Shore's interview (Pauly Shore's "Interested" podcast) of Brian Wilson, well....
Let's just say it was funny to listen to a guy who has (to be complimentary) slight knowledge about baseball interview a guy who he thinks is still the Brian Wilson of 2012.
"Brooooo, why can't you get signed?"
It's equally awkward to listen to Brian Wilson skate around the fact that he flat-out sucks now. He just lets him compliment him.
Also, I can state with almost 100% accuracy that Brian is either on 'roids now or sucks now as a result of stopping 'roids usage just based on the evasive answer he gave to Pauly's question about 'roids in the sport.
@Purple Drank @Dustin Nosler "Mah daddy and mama are here."
"We love our boy."
2 months ago on 2015 Dodgers Top 100 Prospects: No. 75-51
"Greinke’s actually exceeded our expectations in his first two years as a Dodger, proving himself to be far more than just a well-paid second banana to Clayton Kershaw."
He has kicked ass beyond belief. My favorite Greinke memory: I was at a spring training session. A guy who had a thick New York accent called Greinke over. He walked past him then straight to me then continued signing, ignoring the New Yorker, who continued to call to him.
"WUTTA FUCKIN' WAAAAIIIRDOOOO."
-angry New York douche.
loved every minute of it
2 months ago on Enjoy Your Last Year of Zack Greinke, Probably
Well.... The Kings' announcers are quite possibly worse than the Dodgers' announcers....
didn't think that it was possible
"On the replay you can see that the shot hit nothing but the crossbar."
"Yup, pure crossbar. The Kings dodged a bullet there."
"......they're saying that the shot is good. Kings lose."
Jesus, Christ, guys...................... you can't even make a good call *on the slow motion replay*
2 months, 1 week ago on 2015 Dodgers Top 100 Prospects: No. 100-76
@Mike Petriello As someone wrote on a message board about Ghostbusters 3, we should redo every accomplishment by white men in cinema with a new cast of black people and/or women.
Every. Single. One.
2 months, 2 weeks ago on Dodgers invite 27 prospects to annual Winter Development Camp
@internet baseball fan potato friend I knew that it was bullshit from the jump-- ISIS and ebola... what will be the next wave of fear to sell bullshit media articles?
The media all run on fear cycles. People are so fucking dumb and gullible.
2 months, 2 weeks ago on 2014 Dodgers In Review: RP Daniel Coulombe
@Weston T Your avatar just randomly cracks me up.
"Yeah, bitches... Yeah."
2 months, 3 weeks ago on 2014 Dodgers In Review: RP Chris Perez
Someone here should do a gif from The Interview of James Franco saying, "Matthew McCounaughey goat fuck?! GET THAT GOAT! I've got some questions for that goat!"
3 months ago on 2014 Dodgers In Review: SP Red Patterson
@ThtsaPaddlin @Mike Petriello @Guitar DINGERS!!!
Oh, wait... not my line
3 months, 2 weeks ago on 2014 Dodgers In Review: OF Andre Ethier
Ethier: 2014 OBP: .322, Avg: .249
almost exactly Rollins' 2014 line
But I would much rather see someone who doesn't play shortstop like a retirement home candidate than
well, you know...
@SkepticNinja @SabrDodgers @LiterallyPFP Pssshhhh
The postseason is just a huge crapshoot. You might need even just one "really good" pitcher.
3 months, 2 weeks ago on A deeper look at Howie Kendrick, Dee Gordon’s replacement
@capnsparrow "LAUGH ALL YOU WANT
AH'M THE ONE WHO'S GONNA BE ON TAY-VAY, LOOKIn' ALL BUFF"
3 months, 2 weeks ago on So Long, Matt Kemp
@DKD OBP is king with the new crowd
Aahhhh luuv yew gaaaahs
@Paul ran out of puns, is just Paul now ..............Ned wasn't all that bad.
@itsthatguywhodoesstuff Remember when Javier Lopez was the big-shit offensive catcher for the Braves, yet Greg Maddux always wanted Eddie Lopez?
something like that
"I know everyone is in a state of mourning over an athlete that none of us know personally being traded"
Actually, I've spoken to Matt so often in spring training that I *do* feel like I know him personally.
We aren't friends, but...
Many people who frequent the Arizona camp can say the same thing.
Bless you, Matt. You are a good man.
We've lost two very good *human beings* in the last few days (regardless of my opinion about whether these trades were good- and I do).
@Bill Grabarkewitz @Guitar Kemp is awesome as well, but I think that privately he wants to get off this team. So...
3 months, 2 weeks ago on Dodgers acquire Howie Kendrick from Angels, what is life?
I will miss the hell out of Dee, man. Damn.
He and Andre were my two favorite personalities on the team-- just good dudes.
@juanhenry "defense becomes unbearable"
Hell, DH is the ONLY place for him
4 months ago on Report: Hanley Ramirez to sign with Red Sox
I didn't know that the Sox were straight up morons. lmfao
this will be absolutely disastrous for them
@DroogyDodger @Guitar water
4 months, 1 week ago on Jimmy Rollins should be on Dodgers’ radar for shortstop
@Dodgers Nerd Apparently there are still grown men who can't spell "America."
@TheOcelot @Subtle Euphemism aka Jonathan Lingo @Purple Drank
DETROIT VERSUS EVERYBODY
to return to that Bill Cosby thing and "don't have heroes" or whatever
one of my comedy heroes went way too hard on me during his crowd work recently with just malicious, hacky shit
so I'm done with having heroes in comedy
and I'm ready to punch that guy in the face
4 months, 1 week ago on 2014 Dodgers in Review: 2B Dee Gordon
@BIah @Guitar doing a play on "all y'all n......s be trippin'"
SHEEEEIIIIIIIIIIIITTTT, ALL Y'ALL
African American gentlemen
maintaining your balance quite well.
@MFYG IN OTHER NEWS: clouds are generally puffy white things..... just boring, predictable shiz
4 months, 2 weeks ago on Clayton Kershaw, Most Valuable Everything
@brincon @Guitar I knew the guy who banned him (Tommy) fairly well
When Tommy got fired a few months ago Rogan and The Store felt that a reunion was in order.
@brincon @Guitar calling out Mencia's theft of jokes