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@Blue Magic Mike @Guitar Power Rangers premiered on August 28, 1993. We had just moved to Detroit from Georgia, and that date was probably the exact day of my first class there. I was more concerned with stickin' mah wang into a Midwestern girl.

Sorry... tmi, but...I was just older

1 week, 4 days ago on Mailbag #21: Seager/Guzman/LaRoche Comps, Joc Concerns, Dodgers Not Spending?

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@Blue Magic Mike there is a definite generational gap between me and Power Rangers fans

1 week, 4 days ago on Mailbag #21: Seager/Guzman/LaRoche Comps, Joc Concerns, Dodgers Not Spending?

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@Weston T @Guitar But I wasn't joking.

3 weeks, 5 days ago on Dodgers Sign Mike Adams to a Minor League Contract

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going to get my "teeth cleaned" in one hour.... I miss the days when I was younger and it really was a teeth cleaning

now it's more like "inspection to avoid another root canal"

3 weeks, 5 days ago on Dodgers Sign Mike Adams to a Minor League Contract

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@Weston T  Eff that shiz.

Mike Tyson's Punch Out

3 weeks, 5 days ago on Dodgers Sign Mike Adams to a Minor League Contract

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@Vin_Skully I wonder what the rookies think when Koufax and/or Kershaw and/or Greinke watch them throw-- I sure as hell wouldn't want Jim Gaffigan and Brian Regan watch me perform

1 month ago on Joel Peralta’s sore shoulder could open Dodgers’ closer spot for others

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this was linked on Yahoo's frontpage from yesterday- don't know if anyone posted it

"Joc Pederson's troubling trend"

http://www.beyondtheboxscore.com/2015/2/25/8073337/joc-pederson-dodgers-strikeouts-troubling-trend

1 month ago on Joel Peralta’s sore shoulder could open Dodgers’ closer spot for others

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@TheConman  someone told me that I look like him when I wore my Dodgers jersey the other day

and when I'm thin *I do*...  a pale version, though

1 month, 1 week ago on 2014 Dodgers In Review: SP Josh Beckett

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SNL 40 in 4  (at least on the west si-eeeeeeeeeed)

if you be on da east, dat shit on in 1

1 month, 1 week ago on 2014 Dodgers In Review: SP Josh Beckett

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@Lobo @Guitar  Comedy, brosef.... his mom owns The Store.... keepin' up with the goins-on


He is actually a nice man, too. I've met him three times. Horrible interviewer, nice guy

2 months ago on 2014 Dodgers In Review: RP Jose Dominguez

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If you haven't listened to the Pauly Shore's interview (Pauly Shore's "Interested" podcast) of Brian Wilson, well....

Let's just say it was funny to listen to a guy who has (to be complimentary) slight knowledge about baseball interview a guy who he thinks is still the Brian Wilson of 2012.

"Brooooo, why can't you get signed?"

It's equally awkward to listen to Brian Wilson skate around the fact that he flat-out sucks now. He just lets him compliment him.

Also, I can state with almost 100% accuracy that Brian is either on 'roids now or sucks now as a result of stopping 'roids usage just based on the evasive answer he gave to Pauly's question about 'roids in the sport.

2 months ago on 2014 Dodgers In Review: RP Jose Dominguez

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@Purple Drank @Dustin Nosler  "Mah daddy and mama are here."

"We love our boy."

#epic

2 months ago on 2015 Dodgers Top 100 Prospects: No. 75-51

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"Greinke’s actually exceeded our expectations in his first two years as a Dodger, proving himself to be far more than just a well-paid second banana to Clayton Kershaw."


He has kicked ass beyond belief. My favorite Greinke memory: I was at a spring training session. A guy who had a thick New York accent called Greinke over. He walked past him then straight to me then continued signing, ignoring the New Yorker, who continued to call to him.

Later...

"WUTTA FUCKIN' WAAAAIIIRDOOOO."

-angry New York douche.

loved every minute of it

2 months ago on Enjoy Your Last Year of Zack Greinke, Probably

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Well.... The Kings' announcers are quite possibly worse than the Dodgers' announcers....

didn't think that it was possible

"On the replay you can see that the shot hit nothing but the crossbar."

"Yup, pure crossbar. The Kings dodged a bullet there."

"......they're saying that the shot is good. Kings lose."

Jesus, Christ, guys...................... you can't even make a good call *on the slow motion replay*

2 months, 1 week ago on 2015 Dodgers Top 100 Prospects: No. 100-76

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@Mike Petriello  As someone wrote on a message board about Ghostbusters 3, we should redo every accomplishment by white men in cinema with a new cast of black people and/or women.

Every. Single. One.

2 months, 2 weeks ago on Dodgers invite 27 prospects to annual Winter Development Camp

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@internet baseball fan potato friend  I knew that it was bullshit from the jump-- ISIS and ebola... what will be the next wave of fear to sell bullshit media articles?

The media all run on fear cycles. People are so fucking dumb and gullible.

2 months, 2 weeks ago on 2014 Dodgers In Review: RP Daniel Coulombe

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@Weston T  Your avatar just randomly cracks me up.

"Yeah, bitches... Yeah."

2 months, 3 weeks ago on 2014 Dodgers In Review: RP Chris Perez

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Someone here should do a gif from The Interview of James Franco saying, "Matthew McCounaughey goat fuck?! GET THAT GOAT! I've got some questions for that goat!"

3 months ago on 2014 Dodgers In Review: SP Red Patterson

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@ThtsaPaddlin @Mike Petriello @Guitar DINGERS!!!

Oh, wait... not my line

3 months, 2 weeks ago on 2014 Dodgers In Review: OF Andre Ethier

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Ethier: 2014 OBP: .322, Avg: .249

almost exactly Rollins' 2014 line

But I would much rather see someone who doesn't play shortstop like a retirement home candidate than


well, you know...

3 months, 2 weeks ago on 2014 Dodgers In Review: OF Andre Ethier

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@SkepticNinja @SabrDodgers @LiterallyPFP Pssshhhh

The postseason is just a huge crapshoot.  You might need even just one "really good" pitcher.

3 months, 2 weeks ago on A deeper look at Howie Kendrick, Dee Gordon’s replacement

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@capnsparrow   "LAUGH ALL YOU WANT

AH'M THE ONE WHO'S GONNA BE ON TAY-VAY, LOOKIn' ALL BUFF"


3 months, 2 weeks ago on So Long, Matt Kemp

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@DKD  OBP is king with the new crowd

3 months, 2 weeks ago on So Long, Matt Kemp

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Aahhhh luuv yew gaaaahs

3 months, 2 weeks ago on So Long, Matt Kemp

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@Paul ran out of puns, is just Paul now ..............Ned wasn't all that bad.

3 months, 2 weeks ago on So Long, Matt Kemp

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@ABSmileBunch #ABeautifulMind

3 months, 2 weeks ago on So Long, Matt Kemp

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@itsthatguywhodoesstuff  Remember when Javier Lopez was the big-shit offensive catcher for the Braves, yet Greg Maddux always wanted Eddie Lopez?

something like that

3 months, 2 weeks ago on So Long, Matt Kemp

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"I know everyone is in a state of mourning over an athlete that none of us know personally being traded"

Actually, I've spoken to Matt so often in spring training that I *do* feel like I know him personally.

We aren't friends, but...

Many people who frequent the Arizona camp can say the same thing.

3 months, 2 weeks ago on So Long, Matt Kemp

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Bless you, Matt. You are a good man.

We've lost two very good *human beings* in the last few days (regardless of my opinion about whether these trades were good- and I do).

3 months, 2 weeks ago on So Long, Matt Kemp

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@Bill Grabarkewitz @Guitar  Kemp is awesome as well, but I think that privately he wants to get off this team. So...

3 months, 2 weeks ago on Dodgers acquire Howie Kendrick from Angels, what is life?

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I will miss the hell out of Dee, man. Damn.

He and Andre were my two favorite personalities on the team-- just good dudes.

Ugh.

3 months, 2 weeks ago on Dodgers acquire Howie Kendrick from Angels, what is life?

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@juanhenry  "defense becomes unbearable"

Hell, DH is the ONLY place for him

4 months ago on Report: Hanley Ramirez to sign with Red Sox

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I didn't know that the Sox were straight up morons. lmfao

this will be absolutely disastrous for them

4 months ago on Report: Hanley Ramirez to sign with Red Sox

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@DroogyDodger #KingsRock

#CLOSERSunlikeDodgers

4 months, 1 week ago on Jimmy Rollins should be on Dodgers’ radar for shortstop

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@Dodgers Nerd Apparently there are still grown men who can't spell "America."

4 months, 1 week ago on Jimmy Rollins should be on Dodgers’ radar for shortstop

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to return to that Bill Cosby thing and "don't have heroes" or whatever

one of my comedy heroes went way too hard on me during his crowd work recently with just malicious, hacky shit

so I'm done with having heroes in comedy

and I'm ready to punch that guy in the face

4 months, 1 week ago on 2014 Dodgers in Review: 2B Dee Gordon

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@BIah @Guitar doing a play on "all y'all n......s be trippin'"

4 months, 1 week ago on 2014 Dodgers in Review: 2B Dee Gordon

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SHEEEEIIIIIIIIIIIITTTT, ALL Y'ALL

African American gentlemen

be

maintaining your balance quite well.

4 months, 1 week ago on 2014 Dodgers in Review: 2B Dee Gordon

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@MFYG  IN OTHER NEWS:  clouds are generally puffy white things..... just boring, predictable shiz

4 months, 2 weeks ago on Clayton Kershaw, Most Valuable Everything

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@brincon @Guitar  I knew the guy who banned him (Tommy) fairly well


When Tommy got fired a few months ago Rogan and The Store felt that a reunion was in order.

4 months, 2 weeks ago on Clayton Kershaw, Most Valuable Everything

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@brincon @Guitar  calling out Mencia's theft of jokes

4 months, 2 weeks ago on Clayton Kershaw, Most Valuable Everything

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