Just so you know... I'm awesome.
I hope you mean 3 kegs of beer. Otherwise, I'm judging you so hard right now.
1 day, 1 hour ago on 2014 Dodgers in Review: 2B Darwin Barney
This has been my drive by comment for a saturday. I'm now going to go deal with the huge amount of dead leaves in my backyard. Carry on, all.
I am also not hungover. I enjoy being not hungover. And I still got to drink both good beer and good whiskey last night.
@LiterallyPFP @Dave! (Or Justin Turner, Maybe) Defensive stats suck. They are worthless at the extremes.
1 day, 19 hours ago on Regarding the Dodgers interest in Miguel Montero or any other catcher
I know this is off topic, but... https://twitter.com/JeffPassan/status/535944107827273729
@Jeremy_N @Dave! (Or Justin Turner, Maybe) Me too.
Way too many people here know way too much about pokemon. It makes me feel old.
1 day, 20 hours ago on Regarding the Dodgers interest in Miguel Montero or any other catcher
@the great dick tater Fun fact: Even for people of faith, who believe in the Bible...
Genesis 1:1 does NOT say "In the beginning, God created the heaven and the Earth, and totally didn't use evolution to do so, fuck people who use science haha nerds and heathens!"
In other words, I believe in God. I believe He created Heaven and Earth and the rest of the universe, too. I still think it's totally possible that he did so through the process of evolution. The two are not mutually exclusive.
@Disgruntled Goat @Dave! (Or Justin Turner, Maybe) I might also try drinking some beer. There are like 100 on tap.
@itsthatguywhodoesstuff I am decidedly not liberal. I like science.
I get to go taste some whiskey tonight. This makes me happy.
Seriously, this is as sarcastic as he got: https://twitter.com/keithlaw/status/532730673040486401
When I saw the headline, I assumed it was because Keith got a little too sarcastic and snippy in his responses, and insulted another ESPN employee, which might be worthy of discipline... I was wrong. Keith was entirely reasonable, polite even.
@LiterallyPFP @Disgruntled Goat Summary:
Curt Schilling: Evolution is fake! If it's not fake, show me transitional fossils!
Keith Law: (Shows him transitional fossils through Wikipedia)
Schilling: HA! Wikipedia is stupid!
Law: It's well sourced. Please look.
@the great dick tater @Dave! (Or Justin Turner, Maybe) OK. Better make sure you actually have some catsup.
@Disgruntled Goat @LiterallyPFP @Dave! (Or Justin Turner, Maybe) @the great dick tater I assumed this was a simple typo, and he intended to give me a 1/10.
@LiterallyPFP @the great dick tater In addition, that sky-high LD rate led to an ISO 60 pts higher for lefties than for righties.
@LiterallyPFP @the great dick tater BABIP of .408 against lefties didn't help, though that was fueled by a 30% LD rate, so not just bad luck. Also... 18% BB% vs lefties, 9% BB% vs righties. Those two things are the primary culprits.
Now... why? Perhaps it IS a velocity thing - lefties can see a pitch from a RHP better, and that plus the dip in velocity could be why they started lighting him up, and getting lit up could explain why he refused to throw strikes to lefties.
@the great dick tater @Dave! (Or Justin Turner, Maybe) I just want to know if you followed through on the actual offer in the pickup line. If so, how's your toe?
@the great dick tater @Dave! (Or Justin Turner, Maybe) Into using the line or posting it here?
@the great dick tater No, then we'd lose your awesome pickup line.
@Purple Drank @LiterallyPFP People I expect to quietly judge Drank over freaking out over money now and blue marvin freaking out over Heyman's article:
@the great dick tater @Dave! (Or Justin Turner, Maybe) @0ptimus @MajorPuigBaseball That's not sad. Clearly, both parties were simply looking for physical pleasure, and were able to come to an agreement about such.
@0ptimus @the great dick tater @MajorPuigBaseball @Dave! (Or Justin Turner, Maybe) Did it work?
@0ptimus @the great dick tater @MajorPuigBaseball @Dave! (Or Justin Turner, Maybe) That's a good pick up line, tater.
@the great dick tater @MajorPuigBaseball @Dave! (Or Justin Turner, Maybe) Well, what's the answer?
I want to know what potato posted that was so offensive. I love being offended!
@the great dick tater @Diane. Ned Colletti's new position coordinator So is Kemp.
1 day, 21 hours ago on Regarding the Dodgers interest in Miguel Montero or any other catcher
@DBrim HOW DARE YOU? What could possibly be more important than a goat from the internet that you probably have never met?
2 days ago on Regarding the Dodgers interest in Miguel Montero or any other catcher
@DBrim A likely story.
@Purple Drank @Chad Moriyama I don't want a catcher with a serious medical problem like dick issues. Most teams probably don't even have a urologist on staff.
@Purple Drank @Dave! (Or Justin Turner, Maybe) My knife collection is really subpar. Almost every knife I own is for cooking or eating. None are for going clubbing or getting people to stop talking to me.
@BIah @Purple Drank
As always, the rumor mill caveat: Just because the Diamondbacks are talking to the Dodgers about Miguel Montero does not, in any way, mean that the Dodgers are interested. People talk to me about things I don't give a shit about all the time.
@DBrim Just bring a knife everywhere you go, that's all I'm saying. Just remember this scene when choosing your knife: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WWl8EbNN8NM
2 days ago on Dodgers acquire Joel Peralta, Adam Liberatore for Jose Dominguez, Greg Harris
GOAT!! Brim responded to you!
@666foldamort @Dave! (Or Justin Turner, Maybe) @DBrim See, that was the whole problem. I didn't HAVE a knife.
I did pick up the dinner knife on the table and give it a long hard look, but that was just to make the waitress laugh. Spoiler alert: She didn't.
@666foldamort @DBrim Please rate my story.
@666foldamort @DBrim One time, my car broke down on the way to Vegas and I had to spend a night at a shitty hotel in Victorville. I went into the hotel restaurant to try to get a beer, but they didn't serve beer. The rest of the conversation went thusly:
Waitress: There's a night club across the street. You could go there.
Me: Is it a cool place? Is there a cover?
Waitress: No cover, but you got a blade? I wouldn't go in there without a blade.
I went back to my room and stayed sober.
@TheConman @Purple Drank AZ would never want him because something about his testicles because something about he should throw baseballs at people's heads or something. AZ is terrible for wanting it's pitchers to throw at people's heads and Billingsley is terrible for not wanting to throw at people's heads.
Signed, Bill Plaschke.
2 days, 1 hour ago on Dodgers acquire Joel Peralta, Adam Liberatore for Jose Dominguez, Greg Harris
@TellMyWifeISaidHello @TheConman I hated Victorino the whole time he was here. And my hate for Montero is so much stronger.
3 days, 21 hours ago on Dodgers should protect three prospects from Rule 5
Unless I'm mistaken, there is a minor league portion to the Rule V draft. Teams can draft an unprotected AA (or lower) player for the drafting team's AAA squad or an unprotected high-A player for the drafting team's AA squad. That makes me worry a bit about Ralston Cash, who I think could be quite good.
3 days, 22 hours ago on Dodgers should protect three prospects from Rule 5
@HunterStricklandsOedipalComplex @moneynow27 @Uncultured Bastard @Purple Drank Poor contact in the zone is not necessarily a swing issue. Could very well be a pitch-recognition issue. And if that's the case, the only way to improve is to see top-notch pitching.
4 days, 1 hour ago on Did The Dodgers Make A Mistake In Non-Tendering Russell Martin in 2010?
@capnsparrow @Dave! (Or Justin Turner, Maybe) @BlueMarvin @Most Valuable foldamort I wasn't around in Wills' playing days, So I don't know what his bunting style was. But what I always loved about Butler is that it seemed like he was three steps down the line before the ball made contact with the bat. If Dee could do that, he could bunt for hits with great frequency. Butler once had 42 bunt hits in one season, and he wasn't as fast as Dee.
@LiterallyPFP @Dave! (Or Justin Turner, Maybe) @moneynow27 @Purple Drank I just checked Solarte's stats... He was a utility player in the minors, seeing significant time at 2B, 3B, SS, LF and RF. He was primarily an infielder (497 games vs 134 in the outfield). He played more 2B than anywhere else. If anything, the Padres might swap him with Gyorko.
@LiterallyPFP @moneynow27 @Dave! (Or Justin Turner, Maybe) @Purple Drank And he played mostly 3B in the minors. I kind of assumed they'd move him back there after moving Headley. It didn't happen in-season, but it still seems likely.
@Uncultured Bastard @Dave! (Or Justin Turner, Maybe) @BlueMarvin @Most Valuable foldamort I don't get it.
@capnsparrow @Dave! (Or Justin Turner, Maybe) @BlueMarvin @Most Valuable foldamort More top-notch instructors is not a bad thing, cap.
@moneynow27 @Purple Drank Dee wouldn't be enough by himself for Grandal, Joc and SVS would be too much for just Grandal. But if you're assuming MLB-ready, that's probably the starting point.
@moneynow27 @Purple Drank No, the Padres won't take anybody who isn't cost-controlled. MLB ready options would be Dee, SVS, and Joc. Certainly not all 3.