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This is why I have always had a major problem with liberals. They think that people of colour (in addition to poor people) are too limited in intelligence and capabilities to overcome anything, and that they need constant coddling and handouts. It is quite insulting- especially if you're the type of person that had to work hard for everything you've accomplished.


That said- I'm not too keen on many conservatives either. A lot of them possess "traditionalist" beliefs that are downright homophobic, sexist and yes, often times racist. In addition, there is a coldness and lack of compassion that a lot of them have that makes my skin crawl. #teamneither

15 hours, 30 minutes ago on I’m So Glad Russell Brand Opened His Big, Fat, Mouth. Proof the Many Liberals Practice Soft Bigotry

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I think open and honest communication is the key when discussing delicate issues such as race.

I also believe that finding a mate with similar views is important as well, especially if you're very passionate about social issues. I personally lean more so on the progressive side, and would prefer the same in a partner.

1 week, 2 days ago on How to Talk to Your Partner About Racially-Charged Issues

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I don't think she vagina blocked herself at all, she just wasn't interested in him.  Also- he came off as a jerk with that CPT comment, and I would've called him out on that as well.  


Also- that tall drink of water line gave me side eye.  He needs to work on his game.

1 month, 3 weeks ago on Ladies, Do NOT Date Interracially if You’re Too Suspicious of White Men. Please. Just…Don’t. (Letter)

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Oh ffs.  This is why I locked my 4c hair and kept it moving.  People with locks are the redheaded stepchildren of the natural hair community, but I'd rather deal with that than to be in the middle of this mess.

2 months ago on Oh Lawd. The “Ghosts of Mississippi” Have Arrived in the Natural Hair Community

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Last year, Michel'le just came out and revealed that Dre abused her when they were together.  Gave her black eyes, and broke her nose.  I always remembered the Dee Barnes incident, and am surprised that he got away with that without a lick of jail time.  


He's a woman-hating psycho.  And now he's a very rich one.  There is no justice in that.

3 months, 3 weeks ago on Before Dr. Dre Sold His Earphones to Apple, He Sold Black Girls Out to Everyone

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Welcome to NYC, Tracy!


I'll be @ MoCCA this weekend!  Hopefully, I'll see you there!

5 months ago on Where the Guys Are: New York City Version

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I have a twitter account for my blog, but barely use it because I find the twitter crowd really too aggressive and rabid in their politics.

5 months ago on My Take on the Jamilah Lemieux Liberal vs. Conservative Kerfuffle

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I want to see a Tyler Perry movie without minstelsy, period.

5 months, 2 weeks ago on I Told Tyler Perry I Want to See More HEALTHY Swirl Relationships on the Tom Joyner Show This Morning

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As much as I dislike Nicki Minaj (and I dislike her ALOT), I am not bothered by the hair pic.


The nudity however, bothers me because I don't know if it's appropriate for celebs to show off that much flesh.  Then again, I am a little on the modest side.

5 months, 3 weeks ago on Really, Nicki Minaj? What Are You Trying to Prove?

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"Blurred Lines" and the Arby hat aside, I've liked Pharrell ever since his N.E.R.D. days.  He's a talented producer that thinks and acts outside the box.  I don't think he's either a BW ally or basher so much that he's just transcultural and will work with whoever.


Also- he is a MAJOR supporter of the webseries "The Misadventures of Awkward Black Girl" and ran the series on his YT channel (i am OTHER).  He's cool beans in my book.


And in one OT regret:  I *really* wish i had gotten that "Awkward Since The 80s" t-shirt from the ABG shop...They're sold out now :'(

6 months ago on Dear Black People, Can We Support More Songs Like This?!

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@Karla  Basically.  I just scrolled down that textual tripe.

6 months ago on Sh!t Haters Say to Discourage Black Women From Dating Out

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@UnlimitedBeauty @horrorjunky  It also means "whore" (like the Italian word putan).

6 months ago on Sh!t Haters Say to Discourage Black Women From Dating Out

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@kia  That's exactly why I take black oscar wins with a grain of salt because usually their winning role is either dysfunctional or destitute.  Hollyweird gets off on seeing black actors in roles like that.

6 months ago on Judge Not An Ally By Their Skin Color or Whom They Marry…Support is an Action

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I missed the Oscars, as they aren't my thing, but totally agree that not every bm who dates/marries ww is bw's #1 enemy. As long as they aren't saying nasty, hateful $#!+ about blk women, I couldn't care less what their preference is.

6 months ago on Judge Not An Ally By Their Skin Color or Whom They Marry…Support is an Action

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This sounds pretty good.  I definitely will print this recipe and try it.


I also tried the chicken paprikash last year, which was awesome (though very heavy lol).  Thanks for sharing your recipes.

6 months ago on Cheddar Bacon And Scallion Souffle

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@MACI  I agree. 


Also-  I thought the judge was overstepping her boundaries by changing the kid's name (though NGL, I think "Messiah" screams "megalomaniacal" lol ).  It's not like she named the kid "Adolf Hitler".

6 months ago on What’s In A Name?

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@Reaching_100  I love your name!

6 months ago on What’s In A Name?

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My name is Kanika Ameerah.  


My first name originates from Kenya and means "black cloth".  It also is a popular name in India (it means "gold", "atom" or "seed" in Sanskrit).  My middle name means "princess" in Arabic.  


Here's the wikipedia for anyone who cares lol:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kanika_(name)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amira


My parents wanted to name me "Black Princess", as they were big into the black power movement back in the 70s (when I was born).  They wanted to give me a name that reflected pride of who I am as a black woman.  It was a move of love.


I am not going to lie and tell you that it was easy...People used to mispronounce and make fun of my name as a child.  Not to mention, it just wasn't that common to have a name like mine back in the 80s, so I pretty much disliked my name coming up.  One thing I do remember is that when I was a child, I wanted name barrettes.  Of course, they didn't have any in my name, so for my birthday, a family friend had a set of name barrettes custom made for me.  I still have two of them.


It was only recently that I noticed the negative association that my name has with some people.  For example, I've been looking for another job for quite some time, and I rarely, if ever, get callbacks, even though I've had my resume looked over a trillion times.  And now that I am looking for an apartment (in a nicer part of NYC), when I call to inquire about an apt for some reason it is "already rented".


Does it make me angry?  Yes.  Because I am being judged on a non-issue such as my name, when my credentials should speak for themselves.  They don't see me as a responsible tax-paying, law abiding citizen that has been @ the same job for fifteen years, lived in the same apartments for years at a time and always paid their rent/had a good relationship with their landlords.  They see me as a stereotype.  


That said, I wouldn't change my name for anything.  As I mentioned, my parents carefully chose my name out of love, and I want to honor their love for me by keeping my name- no matter how hard it is.  Especially now that my father has since passed away.


And that's what it comes down to for these "ghetto" names.  While I admit that many of them sound completely ridiculous and are aesthetically unappealing, most of these parents named their kids out of love, not to damn them.  It's not the fault of the parent that we live in a racist, backwards and sick society that judges people based on silly stereotypes, instead of doing a proper background check to see what the INDIVIDUAL is all about first.  


The racism and egoism that plagues America will be the downfall of it- not the person with the "ghetto name".

6 months ago on What’s In A Name?

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Wow that comment was just unnecessary. You weren't so much telling the truth as you were projecting your insecurities and internal ugliness onto someone who did absolutely nothing to you.

Trolling a message board won't do much for your self hatred issues...I suggest taking a hobby.

To Keyasha- I am glad that you haven't faced any issues with your name. And even if you did, don't change it ever. Let your accomplishments and credentials speak for themselves and the people who are smart enough to see a valuable employee will hire you.

6 months ago on What’s In A Name?

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I can't mess with pastel pink.  It makes my lips look chapped.  I would totes wear the second shade though (in gloss form).

6 months ago on A Rose by any other name: Pastel Pink Beauty Trends SS 2014

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@Dandelion100 Yup.  I read that part as well...I was just reiterating my agreement of your post.

6 months ago on Tyrese Gibson Speaks on DBR Men “They Love Low Standard Women Because They’re Easy”

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Whatever, Robin!  While I hope you and Ms. Patton have a civil parting for the sake of your child, she deserves WAY better than what you've given her...especially considering how she stuck by you when you were struggling to make it!  Just learn your mistakes and grow a pair!

6 months ago on Latest from Robin Thicke: “I’m Just Trying to Get Her Back”

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@Dandelion100 I agree with  your assessment. There's nothing wrong with a  BW exclusively dating BM if that is her preference.  However, there is definitely a community and societal expectation that BW should automatically be unconditionally loyal to BM (even though this loyalty is not expected and often times, unreciprocated), and BM can automatically lay claim to BW as if we're property of the "race"  rather than individual beings with free will.  

6 months ago on Tyrese Gibson Speaks on DBR Men “They Love Low Standard Women Because They’re Easy”

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Tyrese is dumber than a sack of rocks...BUT- when you're right, you're right...


And yes- he's not saying anything new.

6 months ago on Tyrese Gibson Speaks on DBR Men “They Love Low Standard Women Because They’re Easy”

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She sold CD years ago. I used to make the trek from Yonkers to Bklyn to stock up on CD prooducts when I was in college...they were so amazing back then. I believe Erykah Badu was a huge fan of CD and once modeled for them.

I stopped using CD when the quality went down. I am not mad at Lisa Price for capitalizing on her craft, but sad that CD is now another crappy, overpriced product line and that they separated themselves from their fan base for more mainstream acceptability.

6 months ago on Oh Sh!t…Robin Thicke and Paula Patton Divorce!

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@ChristieRJohnson The work abroad opportunities seem to dry up after the age of 30, which is frustrating because there are a lot of us who have plenty skills and wisdom to offer an employer.


I am 36, no spouse or kids...I would love to work overseas for a year, but there's no programs for folks our age.  I have no interest in returning to school, as generating student loan debt isn't my thing.  So wondering what my other options are?

6 months, 1 week ago on Must Read: Endless Opportunities Abroad For Women of Color

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@chocolateadmiral @Brenda55 @Statuesque  Ironically, Lost Without You was basically about how Robin feared losing Paula because his musical career was struggling (while her acting career was taking off).


I also liked this song below...Totally different from Blurred Lines.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_VTY8ftr1vY

6 months, 1 week ago on Oh Sh!t…Robin Thicke and Paula Patton Divorce!

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I don't think he's so much "blackistani" as he is a a typical dbr bratspawn of the rich and /or famous. Look at the Paris Hilton, the Kartrashians, Cameron Douglas (Michael Douglas' son from his first marriage), Charlie Sheen...all dbr as hell.

6 months, 1 week ago on Oh Sh!t…Robin Thicke and Paula Patton Divorce!

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I was about to say that they've been together since high school and might have just grown apart, but Thicke's slimy behavior certainly didn't help matters

6 months, 1 week ago on Oh Sh!t…Robin Thicke and Paula Patton Divorce!

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The mods deleted it, but yeah, she was calling people"bigots" and saying we were trying.to tear a black male comedian down. It was borderline nutty.

6 months, 1 week ago on Roseanne Barr is Running for President, and She Thinks Siding With Known Black-Woman Haters Will Get Her the Black Vote.

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Wow, this article must've hit a serious nerve if Ms. Barr herself paid a visit here...*grabs popcorn*

6 months, 1 week ago on Roseanne Barr is Running for President, and She Thinks Siding With Known Black-Woman Haters Will Get Her the Black Vote.

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@Aabaakawad  Hehe I live in NYC, so I see white guys that look like him all the time (ergo why I say "average").


And well as I stated- that particular forum is a celeb gossip site, so looks DO matter to that crowd. 

6 months, 1 week ago on Model Lanisha Cole Fires Back On Haters of Her Non-Black Fiance

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Christelyn posted the link in the article, but yea , it's Lipstick Alley.

6 months, 1 week ago on Model Lanisha Cole Fires Back On Haters of Her Non-Black Fiance

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Though I must say, I was expecting to see Quasimodo by the way they were talking about him...He just looks like an average white dude to me? *shrugs*

6 months, 1 week ago on Model Lanisha Cole Fires Back On Haters of Her Non-Black Fiance

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I visited the website and the comments weren't *as* horrendous as I thought.  Don't get me wrong, I thought the "sellout negro" comments were disgusting as much as I found the presumption that Lanisha is marrying her fiance for money rude; however, there were quite a few supporters on the forum that defended Lanisha and even offered her congrats- which is a good thing.


As far as people dogging her fiance's looks- I am pretty desensitized because I don't expect to see deep, intellectual conversation on a celeb gossip message board.

6 months, 1 week ago on Model Lanisha Cole Fires Back On Haters of Her Non-Black Fiance

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@Chicago404  Exactly.  I think college can be useful IF you select the right major that has an excellent return investment.  


My generation was raised to believe that any kind of degree was a good degree, which is why there are so many folks with silly degrees like pottery.  I think at some point, the US should do like China and get rid of Humanities as an option because all this would do is just create another generation of underemployed grads with mountains of student loan debt.  


Had I done it all over again, I definitely would have majored in Computer Science or a similar tech field (since those jobs will always be in demand).  


While I am all for furthering one's knowledge, it absolutely makes no sense to borrow tens (sometimes hundreds) of thousands of dollars for a degree that you'll never get a job in, nor will be able to pay back your loans on.

6 months, 1 week ago on Why Is Everyone Mad At A “Non-Working” Black Woman?

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@Hallyu LoveI am still working the same job that I've had since undergrad.  My salary is decent, and thankfully I have benefits.  But it's not what I went to school for, and I only planned to stay there til graduation.

6 months, 1 week ago on Why Is Everyone Mad At A “Non-Working” Black Woman?

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@oekmama I think in that sense, it does, but it's hardly worth racking up student loan debt for when you can just take these courses on your own.

Thankfully I went to a state school and commuted, so I didn't owe much, so I paid it off in seven years. 

Unfortunately, most people will never get out of student loan debt over a degree which is basically just a wall decoration at this point.

6 months, 1 week ago on Why Is Everyone Mad At A “Non-Working” Black Woman?

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@Dandelion100 I can't speak on the SAHM part, as I am childfree.  

But I personally think a college education is a waste of energy regardless, because it doesn't guarantee you a lasting career (unless you get a STEM degree).  If I had to do it all over again, I wouldn't have bothered with all those useless humanities and women's studies courses.  None of these electives have any real vocational value.

6 months, 1 week ago on Why Is Everyone Mad At A “Non-Working” Black Woman?

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@AngelaLanierBurke  I feel you.  Many of my family members feel the same way about WM.  You can love your family, but don't have to agree 100% (or at all for that matter) with their beliefs.

6 months, 2 weeks ago on Why Is Everyone Mad At A “Non-Working” Black Woman?

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@Dandelion100 @nikkikeith7 @uninterracial  I am guessing she's the one on the far right...but she does look hella young! :O

6 months, 2 weeks ago on Why Is Everyone Mad At A “Non-Working” Black Woman?

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I'm sorry that your mom is not supportive of you. I was raised by a single mother as well, and I know she always wanted my sister and I to have children with a supportive husband...I always thought that all parents would want their kids to have better than what they had. I hope one day she comes around.

6 months, 2 weeks ago on Why Is Everyone Mad At A “Non-Working” Black Woman?

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*Applauds*


All women (be they "traditional" or "modern day") should beware of these toxic, misogynist opportunists that want to use feminism as an excuse to take advantage.  And black women should especially beware of naysayers who condemn them for desiring more than being the world's mule.  


Other women can demand a quality mate, but as soon as a black woman does, then she's a "gold digger"...GTFOOHWTBS!

6 months, 2 weeks ago on You Tried It: On Unsuitable Men Hiding Behind “Feminism”

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@bbcake1991 Staying home with the kids is barely just an "emotional and physical" provision.  As Jamila eloquently stated above, it's just as much work as (if not more than) putting in eight hours at the office.  


Also- research shows that if being a SAHM was a paid position, it would be worth six figures.  http://www.salary.com/mom-paycheck/

6 months, 2 weeks ago on Lessons From The Hubster: What You Get With a Guy Who Wants to Go Dutch on the First Date

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@bbcake1991  I think you kind of missed the paragraph where Christelyn's husband clearly stated he wanted his wife to stay at home and raise the kids.  There are SAHMs who have husbands that make under 100k and even less.   If both parties desire that particular relationship dynamic, they will find a way to make it work, regardless of income.

6 months, 2 weeks ago on Lessons From The Hubster: What You Get With a Guy Who Wants to Go Dutch on the First Date

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