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Those who can, do.  Those who can't, criticize.

1 week, 3 days ago on Shonda Rhimes Hands NY Times WW Writer Her Hindquarters on Social Media

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@Tipper2 I don't believe she was having sex either.  Heavy petting, yes....actual intercourse, no.  She lost her cool, but people are acting like she cussed the cop out or threatened him.  The video doesn't capture the very beginning of the incident where supposedly the boyfriend was grilled "Who is she to you?  How do you know her?"  According to Watts the officer did not even speak to her.  THAT is why the boyfriend said they were being treated like prostitute and client.  If they were assumed to be a normal couple getting too frisky in public, why only speak to the male and ask how he knows the female?  

1 week, 6 days ago on Celebrity Interracial Couple, Daniele Watts and Partner Detained by L.A. Police Who Mistook Her for Hoe and Her “John”

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@Neecy The power of being in show biz.  Even if you've only had one small part in TV or movies, it just goes to show how the media prioritizes what they shine a light on.

2 weeks ago on Update on Danielle Watts: BB&W Exclusive Interview with Boyfriend, Brian

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Wow--this story is splashed across the front page of CNN, with an interview of the both of them.  http://www.cnn.com/2014/09/15/showbiz/django-unchained-actress-detained/index.html?hpt=hp_t1

2 weeks ago on Update on Danielle Watts: BB&W Exclusive Interview with Boyfriend, Brian

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@smartacus @Maxine @Statuesque She was on the phone with her father, but I guess he didn't advise her of this.

2 weeks ago on Update on Danielle Watts: BB&W Exclusive Interview with Boyfriend, Brian

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@PamelaFoster @Maxine @Tipper2 Every special interest group has piggy backed on the gains that blacks and their white allies have fought for.  Every single one.

2 weeks ago on Celebrity Interracial Couple, Daniele Watts and Partner Detained by L.A. Police Who Mistook Her for Hoe and Her “John”

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@Tipper2 @Maxine Interestingly I've found the darker the Indian the more colorstruck and prejudiced.  Lighter-skinned Indians are secure in their privilege.  It's the "black" ones that have to actively do what they can to separate themselves from blacks.      

2 weeks ago on Celebrity Interracial Couple, Daniele Watts and Partner Detained by L.A. Police Who Mistook Her for Hoe and Her “John”

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@Statuesque "She should have asked "are you arresting me ?" and confirmed the answer before walking away.  That was the critical mistake if she wasn't going to comply with an illegal request.  He cannot force her to ID herself unless the law requires it, but he can detain her until he confirms no crime was committed."


Therein lies the rub.  She needed to make him answer whether she was free to go or not.  I've broken my own rule about not reading article comments sections, which are rife with BW stereotypes about her giving "attitude"and escalating the situation by exercising her right to refuse.  CA doesn't even require a person to carry their ID on them.  Since the purpose of laws is to protect the public from harm (or people from harming themselves), did this cop's actions do anything more than waste time and humiliate an innocent couple?      


It's bothersome to me that despite the law, a lot of people seem to take the attitude that well do whatever a cop tells you regardless of proper procedure and if you don't comply prepare to go to jail. 

2 weeks ago on Update on Danielle Watts: BB&W Exclusive Interview with Boyfriend, Brian

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Making out?  So there was no nudity, no actual sex acts?  What would showing her ID even solve if there was no suspicion of criminal activity?  Even married couples sometimes have different last names on their ID.  Why didn't the cop just say this is a public place, go get a room?      

2 weeks, 1 day ago on Update on Danielle Watts: BB&W Exclusive Interview with Boyfriend, Brian

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@SacLove76 "Being black in this country has gotten really hard since Obama has been in office and I feel like these racist are taking it out on the rest of us FULL FORCE because he is the President."


You are speaking what I've been thinking.  It's not something I can prove in a linear fashion, but I do get the vibe that racists who were threatened by his election sat back the first four years, in fear of some black takeover.  Now that they've seen that having a black president neither deters racism nor gives black people special powers, they've just UNLEASHED.  I honestly predict a lot more racists in positions of authority to get away with beating and murdering black civilians while Obama and Holder are still in office.

2 weeks, 1 day ago on Celebrity Interracial Couple, Daniele Watts and Partner Detained by L.A. Police Who Mistook Her for Hoe and Her “John”

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@Tipper2 Yup!  Can't be on top unless there's another group under you.  It's OK to ask for her papers to prove she's not a prostitute but not OK to ask for his to prove he's not an illegal.

2 weeks, 1 day ago on Celebrity Interracial Couple, Daniele Watts and Partner Detained by L.A. Police Who Mistook Her for Hoe and Her “John”

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@LorMarie I want to hear the police call audio.  I would be shocked if it was a male caller, of any race.  Honestly I believe a man who saw them making out would just enjoy the show!  

2 weeks, 1 day ago on Celebrity Interracial Couple, Daniele Watts and Partner Detained by L.A. Police Who Mistook Her for Hoe and Her “John”

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@Zetahille What does the danger of being a cop have to do with it?  I do believe when they chose that profession they were already aware of that!  And I doubt any cop in Studio City is dealing with skinheads or murderous gangs.  Most people who work in customer service will tell you that they're regularly mistreated by the public, so does that mean you'd be ok with every waitress being a jerk to you because she's in a difficult profession?  The potential danger of the job is no excuse at all engage in misconduct or violate someone's rights. 

2 weeks, 1 day ago on Celebrity Interracial Couple, Daniele Watts and Partner Detained by L.A. Police Who Mistook Her for Hoe and Her “John”

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@PaoloP Studio City is very white and affluent.  I would guess a pearl-clutching, geriatric white woman who hardly ever goes anywhere.  

2 weeks, 1 day ago on Celebrity Interracial Couple, Daniele Watts and Partner Detained by L.A. Police Who Mistook Her for Hoe and Her “John”

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@harem @Brenda55 " just read the other day about a 70 pound (I believe it was 70) teen that three cops took to the ground in her school over a cell phone that she was on concerning her ill mother. "


I saw that too.  It was a Hispanic girl in Texas.

2 weeks, 2 days ago on Celebrity Interracial Couple, Daniele Watts and Partner Detained by L.A. Police Who Mistook Her for Hoe and Her “John”

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@wanderinglady @harem I live in Los Angeles.  They could've been going to the park, to the beach, to a concert...it's 90 degrees here in broad daylight.  We shouldn't have to wear silk suits and white church gloves 24/7 to prove we aren't prostitutes.

2 weeks, 2 days ago on Celebrity Interracial Couple, Daniele Watts and Partner Detained by L.A. Police Who Mistook Her for Hoe and Her “John”

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Because most white men grow up with both a mother and a father, they absorb these early examples of relationships.  Even if their parents divorce, they're still likely to see stable marriages through others in their community and social circle.  Virtually all the white men I've known--friends or colleagues--always had marriage in mind as a life goal.  Sure they sowed their wild oats in high school and college, but finding that dream girl and giving her the world was seen as a normal part of a healthy, adult life.  Remember Christelyn's parody video of the single 45 year-old bm serial dater?  It's funny because it's true.  A lot of black men have just lost the desire for companionship these days.  I think many bm marrying ww are doing so on impulse, or were pursued and pressured by the ww.    

2 weeks, 6 days ago on Open Forum: Okay; We Know White Men Married to Black Women are 44% Less Likely to Divorce. But Why?

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I don't know if it still rings true for 2014, but I read that money is the #1 reason behind divorce.  What you spend your money on (or save your money for) is a reflection of your values.  I'd be interested to see whether BW/WM couples are older, more educated, and/or more established in their careers compared to other couples by the time they marry.

2 weeks, 6 days ago on Open Forum: Okay; We Know White Men Married to Black Women are 44% Less Likely to Divorce. But Why?

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@phillychick I was thinking this too.  A wm proposing to a bw is not gaining a trophy wife who society has put on a pedestal.  He is proposing for the person and not any elevated status he will have due to marrying her.

2 weeks, 6 days ago on Open Forum: Okay; We Know White Men Married to Black Women are 44% Less Likely to Divorce. But Why?

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@quiquinorton Agreed.  We'd have to know which gender is initiating the divorce to talk about who is staying put.

2 weeks, 6 days ago on Open Forum: Okay; We Know White Men Married to Black Women are 44% Less Likely to Divorce. But Why?

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I love statement necklaces.  They look fabulous and dramatic against dark skin.  

3 weeks ago on Fabulous & Flirty Fall Trends

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Congratulations you guys!  Can I say, Jeff, that I am impressed you did +/- ten years in your age range and didn't put seeking woman maximum age 40....Also Vegas in July?  Well, some like it hot!  Looking forward to the pics.

3 weeks ago on BB&W’s Very Own ‘EarthJeff’ is Getting Hitched!!

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@caligirl94117 Well you know what they say in real estate:  location, location, location.  I think it's better to own a small place in a nice, safe neighborhood than live somewhere affordable but have the mental stress and possible physical harm of a bad neighborhood.  And if you need to sell, will a property in Blackistan increase in value or even break even in a few years?  Maybe you can get a fixer-upper or foreclosure in a nice area.  

3 weeks, 3 days ago on And We Wonder Why More Non-Black Men Don’t Approach Us?

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@phillychick Sudan actually has more pyramids than Egypt, albeit smaller.  The first Egyptians, before many waves of conquerors, originated from the Sudan/Somalia area.

3 weeks, 3 days ago on Lineage: The Extraordinary Gift of Knowing Where You Came From

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@dani-BBW @Christelyn  @MissFLondon What do they mean by Southwest Asian? Perhaps Arab rather than Indian?  There's just a puddle between East Africa and the Arabian peninsula.  But I'm also scratching my head at the Kenyan ancestry.  Even Central Africa would be too far inland for the American slave trade.  But you never know--maybe Christelyn's ancestors migrated to western Africa for whatever reason.  


I used African Ancestry to trace my maternal lineage and found out I'm Temne from Sierra Leone.  The beautiful CNN International anchor Isha Sesay is Temne (and she is interracially married).  African Ancestry is about twice the cost of the others but they claim to have the most comprehensive genetic mapping for Africa.  I'll eventually get my dad or brother to find out my paternal side, and test with another company to reveal the non-African lineages. I love knowing.  I love having an origin and being able to answer people who ask where my family comes from!

3 weeks, 3 days ago on Lineage: The Extraordinary Gift of Knowing Where You Came From

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Praire fever LMAO!

3 weeks, 5 days ago on LMAO! New Video, “If Black Women Said What White Men Say”

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@Tammy_Ghalden Now this is more relevant than a foreign stand-up comedian who can't vote or influence American policy.  But since the election of Obama, and the shifting demographics of the country, conservatives are grasping at straws to show that racist liberals exist.  Well duh, of course they do.  But not all have the power to enforce their bigotry.  

3 weeks, 6 days ago on I’m So Glad Russell Brand Opened His Big, Fat, Mouth. Proof the Many Liberals Practice Soft Bigotry

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@Browncow @Maxine @jesslabellefleur Why should I come up with something else when your convenient answer will be that that person is inflammatory and only seeking attention?  

4 weeks, 1 day ago on I’m So Glad Russell Brand Opened His Big, Fat, Mouth. Proof the Many Liberals Practice Soft Bigotry

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@jesslabellefleur @Browncow Well when someone says "our blacks are better than their blacks" they might as well be calling you a pet.  And none of her fellow conservatives called her out on it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LYDGMt68K6o

4 weeks, 1 day ago on I’m So Glad Russell Brand Opened His Big, Fat, Mouth. Proof the Many Liberals Practice Soft Bigotry

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@caligirl94117 @Daisy_inthe_Field It would take reams of paper to cover what Ted Nugent and Rush Limbaugh have said, and they've been popular for a lot longer than Russell Brand.

1 month ago on I’m So Glad Russell Brand Opened His Big, Fat, Mouth. Proof the Many Liberals Practice Soft Bigotry

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I'm a liberal for many reasons that have nothing to do with race.  And since Brand is not an American legislator, a political strategist, a judge, or even an American, I fail to see what this has to do with the Democratic party.  He's on nobody's side but his own thirst for attention.  Honestly I'd take his ridiculous, ignorant "jokes" over right-wingers trying to justify Eric Garner's strangulation death or rallying behind Darren Wilson.  Ultimately racists come in all political stripes and we can't look to any one political party to "save" us.  No one can save us but ourselves.

1 month ago on I’m So Glad Russell Brand Opened His Big, Fat, Mouth. Proof the Many Liberals Practice Soft Bigotry

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I agree with Christelyn that telling her daughter not to date BM could lead to just that because teenagers like to rebel.  I also think by explicitly banning a certain group of men, the daughter will wonder what's so bad about them and make it her mission to go through every BM DBR to find out.  Depending on her relationship with the mother, she may even set out to prove that she's different from her and a better woman by trying to make it work with a BM DBR.  You know how inexperienced women believe they can change a man and take pride in being the ride-or-die chick for someone so not worth it.  Emphasize quality not color, or else the daughter may bring home a non-black man who happens to be a loser.

1 month ago on Is It Okay to Discourage Your Daughters from Dating Black Men?

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@Brenda55 @ChicMystique I'm trying to figure out what was in the mostly-eaten appetizer bowl. Looks like some fried crunchy goodness.  And now I'm having an onion ring jones.

1 month, 1 week ago on Here’s Another Rainbeau Who Just Came Out of Lurkdom

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@Zetahille @Keioni Uh....did you seriously write that women can clamp down on a man during sex so he's unable to pull out???  Between that and the "powers of seduction" and Adam and Eve stuff I'm flabbergasted.  Please don't tell me you also think our vaginas have teeth and our periods ruin crops.

1 month, 1 week ago on Stay Away from Sociopathic Men Who Wish to Corrupt and Shackle You Via Single Motherhood!

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Roasted garlic is divine!

1 month, 1 week ago on How Roasting Makes Everything Better.

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@Tammy_Ghalden @SirLoinDeBeef Children are in school for 12 years.  OF COURSE there's time to cover the history of 2nd largest group (or what was the  2nd largest up until a few years ago) of people in this nation, who have been here since the 1600's.  The economic engine of slavery and then sharecropping, the upheaval of Jim Crow, but also the uniquely American musical stylings of jazz, how WW2 nudged integration, art/lit of the Harlem Renaissance...you don't get American history without African-American history.

1 month, 1 week ago on (Bonus) QOTW: “How Can I Talk About My Culture with My White Boyfriend?”

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@Diversitymom Yes!  This article immediately made me think of him.  Time to rent White Nights and the last season of Sex and the City.  Though he didn't dance he did get to run and leap over a trash can to chase after a cab!

1 month, 1 week ago on Man Candy Monday: Arabesque, Allongé! The Beauty of Ballet

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@SirLoinDeBeef @Maxine @RhondaSpeights I think I've only been exposed to the cheap stuff.  Absolutely love my microbrews though!

1 month, 1 week ago on Ask a White Guy: The Online Dating Quandary

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@Leona_LoveQuest Yes I've been through that.  Though it wasn't explicitly stated that I wasn't black enough, there were assumptions made about my attitude toward class, money, career, etc.  He had a chip on his shoulder about "rich people" (read: anyone not poor or blue-collar) and expected me to be down with the struggle.  I was livid when his coworker (I wasn't there) referred to me as a "Cosby kid" and he didn't call him out for it.  This coworker knew nothing of my background, but I was lumped into a special stereotype because I guess because I have a bachelor's and don't speak Ebonics!   


Once Broke White Ex called me while I was on my laptop outside late at night in an affluent neighborhood.  The coffee shop was closed but their wi-fi was still on.  I mentioned a passing police car.  He remarked that they would bother me because I was black.  This was a rather liberal area and what little I'd seen of the police they were friendly. Broke White Ex's attempt at solidarity with me was misguided and showed his inferiority complex (because HE had been harassed by cops before).


Bottom line it's nobody's right to tell us who we are!

1 month, 1 week ago on (Bonus) QOTW: “How Can I Talk About My Culture with My White Boyfriend?”

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@caligirl94117 I agree.  This is the difference between dating online and dating someone that you were paired with by a mutual friend or other means IRL.  We are visual creatures and it's both time-consuming and impractical to click on every opposite-sex person in your area in your age range and then thoroughly read all those profiles, and then ignore those red flags in her profile because underneath all the bitterness she MAY have a good heart?  A man could find himself messaging 50 women a day at that rate!  The choices online can be overwhelming, and if someone's paying money they don't want to take forever to find a date.  Honestly it's like shopping for produce.  How many of us choose slightly bruised or discolored fruit, even though the inside could be perfectly fine to eat?

1 month, 1 week ago on Ask a White Guy: The Online Dating Quandary

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@SavageTango @Law Wanxi Perhaps more people need one of these?  http://www.eversave.ncrowd.com/national/34661-selfie-stick-w-mount?aff_id=&ref=507800382&key=4B5D2EEF47424B2DA3B32812550F6124&sourceid=168151  I guess it was only a matter of time before someone invented something like this.


Your colleague's selfie looks great, but most people end up taking the self-absorbed-teenager-on-myspace or attention-starved-reality-star-on-instagram type of selfie.    

1 month, 1 week ago on Ask a White Guy: The Online Dating Quandary

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@SirLoinDeBeef @RhondaSpeights @caligirl94117 "IMO, avoid 'art clubs' and art galleries - you will meet men ... gay men & metrosexuals ... or the married guys, being dragged there by their spouses."


Ditto for wine tastings.  Go to brewery tours or whiskey tastings instead.  Whiskey tastes like nothing but fire water to me but oh there were several men happy to school me about the craft and convince me otherwise.  

1 month, 1 week ago on Ask a White Guy: The Online Dating Quandary

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@tonyrog @Beautee_85 I know there's more than one version, but here's Shirley Bassey: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZqG7RkDKmdE

1 month, 1 week ago on Ask a White Guy: The Online Dating Quandary

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@Leona_LoveQuest @caligirl94117 I know what you  mean.  My married friends literally have NO single friends except for me!  They are very insular, particularly once you get into your thirties and people move to new cities because of marriage or career, leaving behind friends from their single years.  My married female friends do have female friends that are living with a guy or engaged, but their husbands are no longer friends with any single males.   I guess it  doesn't hurt to at  least put the word out, though.  Maybe the next new guy at the office will be single.

1 month, 1 week ago on Ask a White Guy: The Online Dating Quandary

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