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@tonyrog LAWD......................! Wait......wait.......yeah....

12 hours, 27 minutes ago on Man Candy Monday: A Well Dressed Man

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I'm confused ho

2 days, 1 hour ago on On Vetting: How Men Run Game By Telling the Truth!

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@BWC I have a thing for catsuits, knee high boots and chains around my waist. My accessory of choice is an 8 ft leather whip, used with precision for those bad boys who need to be handled as I fight, er, crime..

I'll not cause a scandal by posting pictures here. Just use your imagination..... :) 

5 days, 1 hour ago on Rosario Dawson to Play Night Nurse in New Daredevil Comic Series from Netflix

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@luvtheswirl @KyiaKpatrick "He may want her to do everything for him like a mother that he sleep with" that's ONE aspect of male psychological needs in a relationship but you won't often hear it discussed unless you in college or a therapists office. 

6 days, 13 hours ago on Steve Harvey Has a New Dating Websites Aimed at ‘Teaching Women to be more DATEABLE’

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@BWC @SavageTango @caligirl94117 Yes........... first thing is shoes and second is hands and nails. Clawed, chipped nails and hands disgust me. Shoes can be negotiated depending on where and what you do for a living. 



6 days, 13 hours ago on Steve Harvey Has a New Dating Websites Aimed at ‘Teaching Women to be more DATEABLE’

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@Brenda55 @dani-BBW Thanks for writing about this. I had the same article on my FB feed but it's one of several involving Black women and this is weeks old. 


Since then, several more murders have happened to black women, and sad to say the police abusing women is common. It's just not the 'clean and gud' women that suffer from the exploitation. 


I would love to see BB&W throw their weight behind actual incidences where our collective voices will roar for the attention we deserve. 


I am not a fan or 'waiting on it', because um............we're still waiting. 

1 week, 5 days ago on Cop allegedly sexually assaults eight Black women – where are the women’s groups?

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@Christelyn  @Aleah2015 I am so appreciating @HowardTyroneSmithII and your awesome avatar AND thanks for letting him grab the mic. 

I think some of the BW who visit this site need to work on their own CD as it pertains to thinking ALL BLACK MEN hate them, it makes it so much easier when we all communicate our needs. 


Some may Swirl but it's gonna be a few generations away before the entire world is tan therefore, can't we all just get along??? :) 

2 weeks ago on From a Black Man’s Mouth: About All That Hate…

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@Statuesque @Gijou " I also don't have the belief that marriage is reserved for flawless people." 

I could hug you for this statement @Statuesque 

2 weeks, 2 days ago on If It Can Happen to Amber Rose…..Why That Marriage Certificate Makes All the Difference in the World

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@lindsaynagle Thank you so much. I do write about socially liberal topics, to say the least. If you would like a topic discussed that you think would be interesting to the left, left field audience than please email me tracy@rhedbananamedia.com and I'll look into it. 


I do not always agree with the stance taken here on marriage, gender roles, expectations, and stereotypes, all I can do is present a topic and let the readers control the dialogue. There is PLENTY that I read here that I believe to be out dated, counter productive, naive and outright ignorant. 

But then again, as we have a full on respectful conversation we do leave a diverse contribution to the issue at hand. Women will benefit from our sweat, both traditional and liberal so please know that I support the division in some of what we use to define our female experiences. 

2 weeks, 2 days ago on If It Can Happen to Amber Rose…..Why That Marriage Certificate Makes All the Difference in the World

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I'm first!!! CONGRATS TO YOU BOTH!!! I love the matching smiles...

2 weeks, 2 days ago on Another BB&W is Getting Hitched!

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@Sophia Which is why we're here announcing that BW need to open their world view if they would like to enjoy a life of respect and dedication created from men living in the real world and not entertainment. Get in where you fit in, everyone else is. 

2 weeks, 3 days ago on If It Can Happen to Amber Rose…..Why That Marriage Certificate Makes All the Difference in the World

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@jesslabellefleur It's not doomed. There are PLENTY of men that don't cheat. But you don't hear about them because they're home with their wives, bills and kids and not broadcasting that they are doing what they are supposed to do. 

2 weeks, 4 days ago on If It Can Happen to Amber Rose…..Why That Marriage Certificate Makes All the Difference in the World

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@Lisa_Lisa I think you are wrestling with some virgin/whore issues since I said that maybe the readers won't consider themselves to have anything in common with AR. 

She's a woman that was married and her deciding to marry before having children was a beneficial dicision. She could have been like many other celebrities and been careless and carefree, he would have cheated and they broke up and she'd get her child support. Now she may get spousal support, child support AND whatever their pre-nup outlines for her in addition to state law. 

You're trying to have another conversation and somehow deviate from the topic as I presented it.  

Regardless of WHO you may be, or WHO you partner with, marriage is a better bet than not if you plan on being together and having children. 

We're not discussing who marries whom, just what happens when they do marry and divorce. 

2 weeks, 4 days ago on If It Can Happen to Amber Rose…..Why That Marriage Certificate Makes All the Difference in the World

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@Lisa_Lisa @tracyreneejones @katrinarucker35 "A man of quality" would want her....


What, pray tell, is a man 'of quality'? One who is superficially judgmental about the manner in which a woman earns her money. What is deemed an 'acceptable' occupation for a 'quality' man? 

The assistant to the VP may just as well be offering 'extra' services on the job with her boss. The waitress gets extra tips due to her big boobs.....

I don't know, runway model? Ballet dancer?


A 'street women'.....the language you use is very telling. Some 'lesser than' woman..the same can be said of so many others. Some men enjoy the lack of pretentious behavior found in what you may consider a common woman. Men are willing to overlook much when it comes to choosing a woman. 

2 weeks, 4 days ago on If It Can Happen to Amber Rose…..Why That Marriage Certificate Makes All the Difference in the World

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@Lisa_Lisa @darkandlovely Strip clubs, escorts, Domination dungeons, or the local glory hole. It's not like you'd be privy to this extra curricular activity. The BM 'rap' lifestyle glorifies it but don't think a man can't get next to a piece of women in more places than the strip club. 


Strippers are entertainers...not hookers...I'm not too worried about my man going home with a stripper, she's probably going home to her life. 


Now those business men on trips, and those 'boys night out', you'd be amazed at what goes on there...or so I heard.. 

2 weeks, 4 days ago on If It Can Happen to Amber Rose…..Why That Marriage Certificate Makes All the Difference in the World

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@simplylois @tonyrog Chile, bye...those same men who speak of 'nasty' women are the same ones who would take her if SHE'D have him.

Fat girls. 

Ugly girls. 

Mannish women. 

Churchy women. 

Dyke women...

"Nasty' women......


Have husbands and children, but if you'll listen to the men speak, these women aren't 'acceptable'....I believe none of that. Men pick and choose as they see fit and will eat their words when the opportunity presents itself. 

Heard plenty of men talk of 'nasty' women, and see those same men chasing or pursuing those same women. Sometimes men doth protest too much....

2 weeks, 4 days ago on If It Can Happen to Amber Rose…..Why That Marriage Certificate Makes All the Difference in the World

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@darkandlovely " I never understood why women who are strippers/dancers are somehow less desirable as mates but the men who put money in their G-strings aren't. "


That's a whole 'nother topic, but yes, indeed. 

2 weeks, 4 days ago on If It Can Happen to Amber Rose…..Why That Marriage Certificate Makes All the Difference in the World

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@Marielisa_ "In my entourage, I have noticed that married women tend to always give 2nd chances to their cheating husband and work overtime to "make it work" ."


Those second chances often pile up and next thing you know you've got wasted years and a cheating spouse (might have some outside kids and disease to deal with also), I can't be bothered. 

2 weeks, 4 days ago on If It Can Happen to Amber Rose…..Why That Marriage Certificate Makes All the Difference in the World

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@LorMarie " you become a rich guy's baby momma without the ring, you are pretty much dependent on how kind he is should you break up (admittedly, I'm no expert on family law)."


The laws are there for protection so if you're gonna go for it, might as well make it legit. 

2 weeks, 4 days ago on If It Can Happen to Amber Rose…..Why That Marriage Certificate Makes All the Difference in the World

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@katrinarucker35 She may decide slow and steady is the way to go after having dealt with this guy. She might date a man with a more traditional career now that she has a child to consider. Things adjust with time, you live and you learn. I hope for the best for any woman, especially one with a child, and a future ahead of her. 

2 weeks, 4 days ago on If It Can Happen to Amber Rose…..Why That Marriage Certificate Makes All the Difference in the World

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@darkandlovely "Why do we automatically assume that when a woman marries a man with money, that is THE reason she married him?  It's always the default.  She's no broke, has been ex-stripper.  Now granted her net worth doesn't match Wiz' but she has her own money, clothing line and plans to launch an eye wear line.  She was quite comfortable before she got with him and I'm sure she'll be fine when he's gone."


Because it's easier to blame the woman in a situation, regardless of what is going on or what occurred. She's WRONG somewhere in the narrative. She got married, bore a child, and she's leaving a cheating spouse. She's doing everything we claim that a woman SHOULD do to optimize her life and it's still not good enough. 


Says more about the person making such comments than it does about the topic of either Amber or Wiz. 

OR


"HOES be winning"....wedding rings and everything else and everyday women don't want to have to consider life where their 'good' woman/anti bad woman presentation will still be overlooked for a woman of scandal or something they think makes her less worthy or desirable. 


The amount of men of means that are married to women from salacious backgrounds are plenty. But it's not like these people advertise their former life, or the fact that they were chosen. It's the same as any married and happy couple, they're too busy living their awesome lives to bother with defending. 

I'm sure people say the same thing about EVE.......'why would he marry HER.....!!!" (when I'm over here all single and wishing someone would marry me....) 




2 weeks, 4 days ago on If It Can Happen to Amber Rose…..Why That Marriage Certificate Makes All the Difference in the World

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@Lisa_Lisa "I don't believe her situation is equal to the situation that many black American women find themselves in, because  most black males with whiz Kalifa's money would never marry a black ex stripper (like Amber rose) without a prenup. "


The prenup is the point of the entire article, I'm not sure what you mean by this statement. 


'I don't believe her situation is equal to the situation that many black American women find themselves in, because  most black males with whiz Kalifa's money would never marry a black ex stripper (like Amber rose) without a prenup." 


Um, what? 


Men with money will present a woman who he is marrying (regardless of her income) with a pre-nup. You can rest assured that business owners, attorneys and others with vested interest in business ventures (and lawyers who advise them of how to protect such interests) will usually present a pre-nup NO MATTER WHAT TYPE OF WOMAN. If a woman is smart she'll demand that he does, and the prenup will outline what she gets and how things will be divided. She should then take that to her own lawyer. 


So average black woman marrying certain men will be in the same situations HOWEVER, the prenup is there to provide and protect both HE and HER. AND yes, this is why women SHOULD MARRY rather than just pop out children. (MY ENTIRE POINT) 

IMO.....a woman (regardless of race and income) SHOULD see dollar signs when considering a man as a spouse. Love doesn't pay the bills and a man should be able to improve HER situation at the very least. We discuss this here often. 

Who do you think these BM with money are marrying? Last I heard, it was non-black women who come from all types of backgrounds. That was the gripe. 


"Heck, even Dwayne Wade(black basketball player with an estimated net worth which exceeds 100 million) requested a pre-nup prior to marrying  Gabrielle Union and she's a  beautiful actress with an estimated net worth of 9 million dollars. "


I can't tell if you are agreeing with me or disagreeing with me. Men (with money) usually pre-sent pre-nups. GU has her own interests so why would she not also have him sign one. He has kids, she does not, they both have money. 


Can you clarify in case I misunderstood you? 




2 weeks, 4 days ago on If It Can Happen to Amber Rose…..Why That Marriage Certificate Makes All the Difference in the World

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Let me add some direction because there is too much focus on 'the white woman' and the Black man who chose her and what about me...


I didn't suggest that anyone 'cape' FOR her or FOR them. 


I am posing the question of "When is it appropriate to come to the defense of another person (in general be it woman or man and in spite of racial difference or similarities) OR NOT and is it justified to expect others unlike you to come to (or start coming to) the defense of BW during instances of hate and aggression?"



I feel like 'do unto others is lost on some of the conversations I see when it comes to BW specifically (BM too truth be told, they want someone to do for them....women can be accused of the same). Too many Black folks feel a solution to their plight is found in the power of others. 


You (in general) want people to defend you (not you but in general) yet you do not defend yourself or those like you (whatever that may mean) or think it your responsibility to defend another person (It's not RESPONSIBILITY-It's a choice) regardless of what race or gender the person may be (but for some supporting the cause of BM) 


I can apply this observation to those who know of molestation, or other abuses in real life and will find each and every reason to avoid becoming involved. 


Yet there is a time when maybe you as an individual needed the help of another and they chose not too. 


I think all people deserve humane treatment. I think change occurs when you 'do unto others' as you would have them do unto you. 


Surprisingly for my atheist self, right?! 


How does that work...... 


Can't each and every person find a viable excuse to ignore the harm done to others? Yes. 


Isn't some of the anger and confusion experienced by BW due to the inactivity of others, the neglect and lack of concern? 

You give back what you were given yet want different results.... It's a psychological paradox. 


I would have used other examples but for using certain subjects to discuss bullying adds to the situation of humiliation and embarrassment and also bring more bullies. This post could have been about the raped black teen girl whose video or the rape went viral (did she deserve 'caping'? or it could be taken from tpre-teens/teenagers who bully each other to the point of suicide) 


Choose who you defend but remember that others may choose to defend or not defend you at some point. 


Be the change that you want to see... 


Am I too simple minded or idealistic? Maybe. 


He and his wife are celebrities. This is common for everyday people....and what is to be done? Hunch shoulders and post the Kermit the frog meme....


I don't tolerate bullying or hate. I don't need a team of anyone supporting me, nor do I need permission to speak up when I see something wrong. 


I defend myself and I'll defend you and others like you or me and different from you or me. Strangely enough when one tiny little voice speaks up, suddenly the abusive person gets a little smaller and on and on and on until they finally vanish into the cave they came from. 


It's like magic. 






3 weeks, 4 days ago on The Nation of Social Media Hate Comes for Omari Hardwick’s Wife….

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@jazzyfae45 "I wish the likes of Usher 's ex-wife could have gotten the same treatment or Whoopi Goldberg. #IJS" All it takes is for people to defend anyone they see being abused. Then it wouldn't be a question of Who it becomes a question of How. 

3 weeks, 5 days ago on The Nation of Social Media Hate Comes for Omari Hardwick’s Wife….

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@Lala88 "Bc if it was a wm/bw situation we wouldn't be afforded the same defense. " How does that change? Individuals are well within their rights to sit back and do nothing if it does not personally affect them but when does ANYONE get the opportunity to be defended. 

That's my paradox. Even the term 'caping' makes it sound like to intervene on someone's behalf is a great feat of man rather than a gesture of civility. 

3 weeks, 5 days ago on The Nation of Social Media Hate Comes for Omari Hardwick’s Wife….

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@International_Responder Yes, the crazy 20's made for clearer 30's......Indeed. 


I don't want anyone to think I woke up like this. I would fall out and roll on the floor and go through waiting for the shoe to drop because certain men aren't capable of being stable and dedicated. 


Some people in general aren't able to commit due to emotions, responsibilities, other relationship demands and the inability to be mature about it. I've gotten the memo to pump my breaks from great guys who needed to make it clear that serious relationships weren't on their horizon (for whatever reason. It doesn't matter now I just needed to know and adjust my perception) 

I think a lot of relationship pain could be reduced if women didn't think it was ALL ABOUT THEM. Certain women embrace/expect the rejection when instead it's probably more actuate to realize that the lives of others does not revolve around a love interest. 


All things considered that LOVE WILL CONQUER all is a myth. Love requires clarity and decisiveness at the very least. 

3 weeks, 5 days ago on Leona’s Love Quest: Is Your Attachment Style Hindering Your Chance at Love?

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I don't need a quiz to tell me that I'm SECURE..... This is something I saw but didn't have the language to explain. 


Yeah, certain groups of people, I'll leave them to aggravate themselves, not into too much drama, I do compete for attention because most of my dating prospects are also actively date (as am I...)


Awesome article..

3 weeks, 5 days ago on Leona’s Love Quest: Is Your Attachment Style Hindering Your Chance at Love?

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@The Working Home Keeper Same here including the nickname. One braid was always off by the time I was done being a tom boy. My mom thought it was an insult, I thought it was cool. 

1 month ago on TBT: Brown Girls Rocking Beads on Braids

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WOOOO.....HOOOOOO!!! YEAH, BABY!! Congrats!!! Lucky you.......lucky her. We're all gonna be so happy together (don't act like we and the rest of the 500K board won't be wanting invitations, pictures and space at the groom's table.... I can help with that if you need but yes.) We/me expect to dance at your wedding!

1 month, 2 weeks ago on BB&W’s Very Own ‘EarthJeff’ is Getting Hitched!!

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Congratulations to you. I know what it's like to get your history back. I'm very excited for you. 

1 month, 2 weeks ago on Lineage: The Extraordinary Gift of Knowing Where You Came From

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I joined the room as well and I was hoping to get to talk to the visitors. I got advice for plenty of you also but was happy to see all the smiling faces on Google + and hope to see more each week. 

1 month, 2 weeks ago on BB&W LIVE CHATS Weekly on Google+!!!

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@DeepWater WOMAN!!! You tell the BEST stories... a rich life lived and risk taking at all the proper moments. I love it. 

1 month, 3 weeks ago on Man Candy Monday: Able Bodied Men

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GIRL!! You KNOW I came across him while researching and I couldn't believe what i saw. Talk about being like an average man...dangerous and tempting.

1 month, 4 weeks ago on Man Candy Monday: Able Bodied Men

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@Christelyn I swear I try to keep it about more than simply looking at hot bodies, that's too easy! 

If more males and females opened their eyes there wouldn't be so many single folks looking to be partnered. Sexy is relative and active men may risk the chances of being injured, things happen but that doesn't mean that life stops! 


I'm just doing my job. 

1 month, 4 weeks ago on Man Candy Monday: Able Bodied Men

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@ncatina I am 73 also. Great minds think like..it twas a good year. 

2 months ago on TBT: It’s…………… SOUL……….TRAIN…………..!

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@DWB You KNOW this is my handy work!! *pop locks and while typing* 

2 months ago on TBT: It’s…………… SOUL……….TRAIN…………..!

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@BWC I just saw this comment. And you know the door is always open for you and yours. 

2 months ago on The BIG LOVE Movement: Intimacy, Friendship, and Community

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@EarthJeff You give awesome advice and insight. I'm glad to see you 'round the thread, love. 

2 months ago on Ask a White Guy: The Online Dating Quandary

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@SavageTango Ha. I'm sure the audience is quite taken aback by you. Me? Sir, I've not the urge or desire to be racked over coals unless I'm allowed to take gloves off and my mouth guard out. 

*le sigh* Folks don't like criticism. I'm a woman who dates women and men. I spend time around women and men as friends and as lovers. I've got a point of view unlike many but....we shall see. I like 'spirited' conversation, no lie, so you may just be able to smoke me out the rabbit hole...maybe. 

2 months ago on Ask a White Guy: The Online Dating Quandary

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Yasss! Ooh, girl. You've said enough. I'm off to write.

2 months ago on Man Candy Monday: The Blacker the Berry

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Um. No moral man will want you if you show your t*ts. I try to cover my tats up so I don't scare away the pastors and reverends who may want to cruise my profile online. :) 

2 months ago on The Importance of Little Mystery: Would You Click On Me?

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@Daisy_inthe_Field @MissFLondon You had a Man Candy Sandwich going on...? I'm so jealous. Tell me more. Tell me more!! 

2 months ago on Man Candy Monday: The Blacker the Berry

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I cried real tears..... Chris is officially cray-cray!! 

2 months ago on Video: Sh$t Black People Say to Black Women to Keep Them Stuck in the Matrix

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Well, let's see if the advice is better received from a White guy than a Black woman who dates (not really because...er) black women. I got my opinions of what does and doesn't work and we seem to share several. 


Awesome new topic, by the way... very entertaining. 

2 months ago on Ask a White Guy: The Online Dating Quandary

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Good for you!! I didn't have an issue with the selection of men at all. It's simple screening and very casual. You do what you came to do and the appropriate men will show themselves, whatever that may be.

There weren't boogymen hiding out there are most were friendly and engaging. If i were serious about needing a new way to meet men, I would definitely use it again.

Keep us posted on your endeavors, please and thank you.

2 months, 1 week ago on BB&W Writer Joins Tinder…Check Out the Results

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@zipporah I thought the same thing. He would cycle in and out of characters, and would have several dialogues and side jokes about each character to the point where he struct me as manic. 
No other way to describe a person's brain working that fast, but for the fact that I am familiar with a manic thinking brain. I wasn't surprised to learn of his suicide, at all. 

It made me scared, and fearful for the rest of us, when one leaves because they just couldn't take it anymore. Fame, riches and love didn't 'cure' his sadness. That's a very scary thing for 'us' to recognize. 

2 months, 1 week ago on Open Thread: Share Your Favorite Robin Williams Moments

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@Freespirit888 I just want to run my hands along the lines of Mensah's body.. That's all. And maybe rub his bald head. :)

2 months, 1 week ago on Man Candy Monday: The Blacker the Berry

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@Swirlgirl28 I just want Tyrese to stop dam talking... I seriously want to hit him up on Twitter and be like 'bruh, all you gotta do is sing, smile and go to the gym', I wonder if he'll listen to the voice of reason?

If he ages like Tyson Beckford (not age) then he can have a wonderful career as a model, actor and singer. Why he gotta be thinking and speaking is beyond me....

Bernie Mac gave me the impression that he would charm the pants off a woman, which is what his wife said, he charmed her, her parents and he made her his wife. He got her on board with his entertainment aspirations because he wanted to provide for them better than working class Chicago could offer and he did that. I liked Bernie Mac alot (not like I knew him but...) and I'm very sad that he only lived to be 50. His career was really taking off with the Ocean's franchises and his Bernie Mac show bought him into mainstream America. 


You know he didn't care for Steve Harvey, right? Steve tried to back stab him by calling the network doing the Bernie Mac show and offered to do it for cheaper and said he was funnier. Glad they didn't bring his loud suits and horse teef into my living room. 

2 months, 1 week ago on Man Candy Monday: The Blacker the Berry

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