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Mattei is gonna spend 6months in the nerds sacrosanct basement!

Damn, he is a lucky one!

3 years, 2 months ago on Nerd Log - Packing Stuff


So we finaly get to know the person who cleans up all the mess after the shows...

3 years, 2 months ago on Mrs. Nerd Speaks


@Tekkenfan Update:

"In my point of view: Probably the best AVGN episode made so far."

3 years, 3 months ago on AVGN: Ninja Gaiden


How old are the 2 previous winner now? Are they still alive? Do they still have their treasures?

Because if atari was to relaunch a new competition with Waterworld and Airworld, well, how could we be sure that the two previous winners in the early 80's would participate to the finals for the sword?

I They must be more than 50 by now and probably don't give any shit to video games...

3 years, 3 months ago on AVGN: Swordquest


Probably the best AVGN episode made so far.

3 years, 3 months ago on AVGN: Ninja Gaiden


Wow, that was the nerdiest thing the nerd ever filmed!

3 years, 3 months ago on Worlds of Power Megaman 2 (Part 5)


He didn't actually review the three Castlevanias on the Game Boy...

I think he should someday make some follow ups to the castlevania serie, such as he did for the Back to the Future Game. Even if it take's him several years between each review sequel

Something like:

Castlevania Part V: The Game Boy

*Castlevania Adventure

*Castlevania II: Belmont's Revenge

*Castlevania Legends

Castlevania Part VI: The GBA

*Circle of the Moon

*Harmony of Dissonance

*Aria of Sorrow

Castlevania Part VII: the DS (for this one, he should wait a couple of years untill the DS becomes a retro console)

*Dawn of Sorrow

*Portrait of Ruin

*Order of Ecclesia

Castlevania Part VIII: A Follow up in the 3D games

*Lament of Innocence on the PS2

*Curse of Darkness on the PS2

*And eventually, sticking at the end the Lords of Shadow on the PS3/Xbox360

Castlevania Part IX: Castlevania 1 Remakes:

*Vampire Killer on the MSX

*Haunted Castle on Arcade

*Castlevania Chronicles (both on the Sharp X68000 and PS1)

*And finaly concluding with the fact that Super Castlevania was definitely the best C1 remake.

Castlevania Part X: Other remakes

*The Dracula X Chronicles (remake of the Rondo of Bloo)

*Legacy of Darkness (remake of Castlevania 64)

*Castlevania: The Adventure Rebirth (remake of Castlevania Adventure)

Castlevania Part XI: Japanese exclusive games and spin-offs

*Rondo of Blood on the PC-Engine

*Kid Dracula on the Game Boy

*Castlevania Judgement on the Wii

*Harmony of Despair on the current dowloadable Platforms

And if the nerd can possibly manage to get his hand on those:

*Akumajō Special: Boku Dracula-kun on the Famicom

*Castlevania The Arcade (a japanese exclusive arcade game)

*Order of Shadows on the mobile phones. (I know, mobile phones games shouldn't exist)

That would be the ultimate Castlevania review ever made!

3 years, 3 months ago on Castlevania Part 4


The big question I have with this movie, is how it's going to be released? Will it come out on air on a local american channel? Or be hosted online on a paying viewing site? Will it come out only on DVD's? Or will some theaters that produce some independant films?

I must say that for those of us who don't live in america, we're quite concerned by the idea we'll probably going to have to wait a couple more months than the North american fans to get to see that movie if it's not released on DVD... ( increasing the risk of having major spoilers being meanwhile revealed on the internet...)

3 years, 3 months ago on Status


On the Famicom, there's a King of King's game developped by Namco. It's a strategy game that has nothing to do with that wisdom tree shit...

3 years, 3 months ago on AVGN Bible Games 3


Bugs Buny's Birthday Blowout:

Nerd 1 / Bugs Bunny 0

Bugs Bunny Crazy Castle games:

Nerd1 / Bugs Bunny 1

It's just like a street fighter II versus fight: The final match still needs to be set. Perhaps in the nerd movie?

3 years, 3 months ago on Bugs Bunny's Crazy Castle


@BabySlayer777 No it's a cut movie. The true lenght is around 1h30 or more...

3 years, 3 months ago on Turkish Star Wars


@ArikEmeis The main actor is famous in Turkey... and he is a legend among the fans that collects the worst movie ever made...

3 years, 3 months ago on Turkish Star Wars


Cüneyt Arkın, is the worst turkish actor there's ever been! All the movie he's been participating are a pile of junk...

The Turkish Star Wars Rolfe and Mattei have been watching is a shortened version of this film. I've seen it entirely something like 4 years ago, and it's impossible! It goes for 1h and a half of riducule fighting scenes, a pointless story, and all the poor footage.

You laugh at first sight, but after one hour you just can't take it anymore!

If there were two more "awsome" movies from this actor (like beeing "awsome" for their crappiness) I' d recommand to watch "Death Warrior" and "Battal Gazi Geliyor"... These are HORRIBLE!!! But so funny at the same time!

Just check out that "epic" fighting scene taken from "Death Warrior" for instance:

3 years, 3 months ago on Turkish Star Wars


After a quick check out it seems I was wrong with the After burner II game: it was only released on famicom, and not on the NES console.

But for the other games I am completly positive: they are missing in list (Dizzy the Adventurer, Dragon Ball, Formula 1 Sensation, Rod Land and Super Off Road)

And by the way,Dynablaster is not the European release of Bomberman, but the european release of Bomberman II.

3 years, 3 months ago on NES Collection


A battle between Nerdy Turd and Shit Pickle?

Is there on earth a two player game bad enough to fit the challenge?

3 years, 3 months ago on The Odyssey


If you look overall the entire NES collection, it still has it's place in the "good games" list.

Of course, if you get to play an MSX translated version, do prefer this one to the NES version.

3 years, 3 months ago on Metal Gear


There is one console that's definitively missing in that list: The MSX. You can skip that one

I would also recommand the Amstrad GX4000 console. Not a huge console, but it had it's good and awful shitty games!

3 years, 4 months ago on Consoles I Own


Another game only released in Europe that Rolfe did actually miss is ROD LAND, made by Jaleco, in 1992. Its a portage of an Arcade Game only released in Japan, and it's a kind of Bubble Bobble game. The two only european countries who got this game back them where Italy and Spain and it wasn't published in massive quantities: It's the rarest NES licenced game cartridge ever made, and it's a true challenge to find one nowdays! Good Luke to James Rolfe if he ever tries one day to find this one!

The last game I actually don't see in the nerds list is SUPER OFF-ROAD (full name: Ivan 'Ironman' Stewart's Super Off Road). It's also a portage of an arcade version, and it was released in USA and Europe in 1989 by Tradewest. The Super Nintendo version is well best known but the classic NES version is a pretty good game(unlike the superNES one) , and it's playable up to 4 people. It's a kind of RC pro Am or Micro Machine game. I own this one in my collection, with the box all the full notice, and I'm pretty sure Rolfe could find it here and there...

Considering the game colection, I think that's all. But there still are some particular cartridges out there than comes up with the NES. For example, I know there was a Joystick Test Cartridge that could be sent to you by Nintendo's after sales service if you had a controller failure. There's also a U-Force Test Cartridge in order to calibrate the device, but I think it was sold with the U-Force, so I wouldn't be surprised Rolfe already owns it.

3 years, 4 months ago on NES Collection


I see James Rolfe has made it's list from the wikipedia's list of Nintendo entertainment system game.

But that list lacks a couple of games!

For instance, there is an AFTER BURNER II edited by Sunsoft in 1989 on the american NES. It's far more shitty than the original Sega After Burner II, but it still exists and should be found by Rolfe if he ever wishes to have a full collection!

I also see that the nerd has included the fantastic Adventures of Dizzy in his list, but there actually was another Dizzy the Egg game released on the NES console: DIZZY THE ADVENTURER, by Codemasters in 1993, and only for USA. It was on of these unlicensed games that could only be used with the Aladdin Deck Enhancer. Dizzy the Adventurer is the 6th game in the Dizzy series, and was originaly released in 1991 on old computer systems (Atari ST / Amiga / Commodore 64 / ZX Spectrum ...) as Dizzy the Prince of Northfolk.

(I wonder if the nerd is ever gonna try someday to review the old computer systems, the one that came before the first Windows versions... There were actually tons of shitty games on these systems!)

Another game that's not in nerd's list is the DRAGON BALL game. It was first released on Famicom in 1986 by Bandai, as is a pretty shitty game that is supposed to retrace the first adventure of Goku, Bulma, Yamcha and all the caracters of the Dragon Ball animated series.

The game was then ported on the US NES in 1988, but was renamed Dragon Power (and Rolfe owns this game), but actually had many changes from the original: The main caracter is no longer more Goku, but a guy that lokks like him, and several other changes...

However, there was a European portage of the original Dragon Ball game, only released in France (because Dragon Ball was the most popular TV animation among the french kids back in the 80's) , and directly translated from japanese to french with no changes from the original game such as Dragon Power did. It's very easy to find these days in France: evry retro gaming stores has a couple of these games since it's one of the shittyest ever released on the console.

There's also another game Rolfe didn't registered on his list: FORMULA 1 SENSATION, made by Konami and only released in Europe in 1993 by Palcom (a society created by Konami in order to distribute their games in Europe back then). It was initially released on Famicom as F-1 Sensation, but since it's one of the best formula 1 simulator ever made (not to say the best) on the NES, and since the europeans are very fond of F-1 racing, they got to be the only one to have this game. It's not a shitty one, it's actually quite good.

3 years, 4 months ago on NES Collection


The Aracade version of Moonwalker, on the other hand, was so awsome!

I remembre leaving lots of coins in it back there in the early 90's!

3 years, 4 months ago on Michael Jackson's Moonwalker




I tried to explain further more my point of view in the previous post, so I'm not going to repeat myself here!

Just to say: I'd consider the footage you made of the Black lagoon monster movies like a real rehearsal to what you're making just right now. Or that red Zombie movie you made...

Not this video...

It's not a question of ressources you had at this time, it's just that I don't have the feeling with this one you were doing something for real...

And just like in music, feeling is everything!

3 years, 4 months ago on The Green Monster That Walked Into My House (1993)




I'm not sure here. I just think that he was just playing with his toys and latest camera, and trying to fix every element he was playong with in one part.

I don't see this as a prototype yet...

But I guess I'm wrong here since everyone says otherwise!

I wouldn't be surprise that Rolfe is actually looking back at this video several years after and looking at it by considering all he has done so far... and trying to reconnect it to the historical process of everything he has already reccorded.

The question is: was he really, when he was 12, projecting himself in becoming a real amateur film maker, or was he just playing as any regular kid of his age would do?

I kind of picked my answer from what I've felt so far...

But it's just my personal feelings, once again...

3 years, 4 months ago on The Green Monster That Walked Into My House (1993)



I don't know, I just don't feel this video...

It's like, if I was playing with my Ghostbusters toys, or my Mask toys when I was 10, and did it beeing captured on a movie at the same time...

When I was playong with my toys, in my head, it was a huge movie, trust me! A huge mix up between Legos, Playmobils, GI Joes, Mask, Transformers, Ghostbusters, He-man, Thundercats and Ninja Turtles... I could imagine thousand of scenarios possible, depending on he latest movie I just saw last evening, or a book I've red...

The toys I had in hand where no longer more the caracters they represented, but brand new caracters with their own background I've created for them, in an entire new universe imagined by myself...

Well, I just feel that this video is exactly what Rolfe is trying to do right here except that he has a camera to capture all this.

It doesn't cut off the fact that, he knows how to use it...

But it's just, the way I see it, a child playing in his garage.

If he decided to label that movie Cinemassacre, well probably he doesn't feel at all what I'm feeling...

3 years, 4 months ago on The Green Monster That Walked Into My House (1993)



(part 3)

But here, everything make's me feel we're in a child game. It has nothing to do with the early videos Rolfe made, for example the fake one he did with the giant turd splitting all over Mike Mattei in his bathtub. This was just a joke, but it was kind of more focused on strong references: a 1950 ambiance, a fake trailer, a allusion to those old scary movies, all dug up under piles of shit...

Well it was silly. But I feel when seeing such a video that we're heading somewhere: it was stupid but it had it's true purpose, it was a step to something bigger.

Not the video of James Rolfe playing in his garage with his green toy...

Anyway, I'm probably wasting my my time here. I might just never be able to explain you what I don't get in this video... and I just might be the one who didn't get anything, and who's just getting all wrong about it...


3 years, 4 months ago on The Green Monster That Walked Into My House (1993)



(part 2)

But, in my opinion, I just wouldn't care at all if Hetfield, or Angus Young, or Steve Harris or whoever in the world of metal music did such a thing.

Because, it's not my childhood I'd be watching here, nor the childhood of someone I'm a friend with. It's not my life, it's just the life of a guy from whom I love the great work!

I know a baker in my town who does some of the best cup cakes I've ever eaten in my entire life! They just melt in your mouth as soon as you take a bit. He does a really great job, I admire what he does!

But I don't feel like trying to see everything about his life or his childhood, just because he's a fantastic baker! I'd feel interessed however to learn more about his secrets and his recipe...

Why should it be so different with an artist?

Ok, some things are interresting to know from an artist, if it does actually have an influence on their form of art. Hetfield, for instance, has experienced a lot of time death of his relatives: his mother died because she was in a weird cult that refused medical healthcare, Cliff Burton died in an accident were he survived, an other stuffs like that. When you know this, you can understand why he has been so fucked up during the 90's and why his songs started to become some kind of self therapy for him... at least it gives us some clues on why thing has changed so much during that period...

But obviously not a video of him playing around at ten...

To come back to Rolfe's video, well, I just feel we're in the same case.

I clearly understand that he's passionate with cinema and films, and that he's been attracted by impersonate the world of filming ever since he had a camera in his hands... Which is clearly a reason why he managed to become far later so talented with the AVGN episodes.

But right here I just don't feel I'm watching something important. Something decisive. Something which will have some serous influence on the future.

I'm just seeing a kid playing with his toys, and trying to include the camera in it's game.

Don't be mistrusted with what I'm saying, I have nothing against amateur videos, with cheap ressources. I've seen some couple vids like these which we're awsome!

(end of part2)

3 years, 4 months ago on The Green Monster That Walked Into My House (1993)


@TommyO'Neil I see the point, but I'm not really sure you can make such a parallel between this video and an hypothetic "Hetfield rearsing in high school video".

To make myself quite clear I'll just say this: If I was to see a video of Hetfield (or any artist you can imagine) at the age of ten, just showing off with a fake guitar, or a kid's guitar, in front of his family, just pretending he was playing or singing, while the music is playong on a background tape.... I wouldn't care at all...

Neither if, for anykind of birthday party or whatever you could imagine, he was just playing a simple melody on guitar (I don't know, "Smoke on the water" for instance...).

Ok, if I were Hetfield, and I saw myself begining so young to play guitar, I'd feel nostalgic. Normal stuff, I feel nostalgic too when I see pictures or videos of myself taken by my family when I was a kid.

And it's always something you like to share with your family, your friends, just to remember the old times, how things where so much better before, etc... ect...

But frankly, it wouldn't be the kind of thing I'd post on my blog, or my website. Unless, of course, if you think as one of the most famous metal star in the world that you have to release every single bits of your existence public...

Well, why not after all. The times are like that now, and the frontier between privacy and public life is becoming more and more thiner with the internet and all those social networks, blogs, and cell phones applications that instantly gives to your relatives the current GPS localisation of where you're actually at an instant X.

(end of part1)

3 years, 4 months ago on The Green Monster That Walked Into My House (1993)


Somehow, I feel that videos like this one shouldn't be posted online...

It's just that, it's probably a good childhood memory for James Rolfe and the Rolfe familly, and for his oldest friends... You know, just watching pictures or videos taken so long ago, and see how time has changed, etc...

But for me, who 's completly stranger to Rolfe's life, I mean... It doesn't give me any feeling...

OK, the avgn was quite involved in film footing ever sice he was 10 or something. Ok, it's nice to know that, but, no hard feelings there, I don't actually care...

I'm a die hard fan of Metallica for instance (and many other bands actually), I love their music, and I've been knowing them for a much longer time than I know the Nerd, but I wouldn't spend one hour watching videos about Hetfield when he was a kid, playing with his toys or playing hide and seek... It's his personal life: we'll probably never know each other, that's fine, we just keep our personal life for ourselves and for the one we care at.

But on the other hand, I could watch a video of Hetfield when he was rearsing at the age of 16, beacause that's more like something that is going to has a strong influence on the rest of his carreer. You might just see in the way he was trying to play, what were his influence and where he was trying to go...

And that's something I could extend to any musician, or artist, sportsman... and even for the Nerd.

I'm interessed in videos showing the Nerd playing video games back up in the 80's/90's just to see what he was playing and how he became mad.

I'm interessed in videos showing Rolf really starting to get involved in video footage, not just trying to play like he's doing right here...

This is just privacy exhibited right here, not any kind of prototype project or whatsoever that could lead James to start making real videos...

At least it's the way I see it...

3 years, 4 months ago on The Green Monster That Walked Into My House (1993)


I don't know about all the games he plays, but Batman return of the Joker on NES isn't a bad game! It's a good game! OK the difficulty is insane but many of the game at this time were hard as hell.

3 years, 4 months ago on Batman Part 2


@Mike/Cinemassacre@matti90 Complicated? They're easy as shit! What didn't you understand actually?

That the tower gives you a bonus in defense when you're inside? That the bowmen have a range of two cases and the crossbowmen a range of three?

I haven't played this game for at least 15 years and I still remember the rules!

If you found Battle Masters complicated, don't try any true wargames! Battle Masters was the kids version of the Warhammer Fantasy Battle which is far more complicated, trust me! (the rule book makes around 200 pages, and each armies needs it personnal 80 pages book to explain their own mechanisms)

3 years, 4 months ago on Board James Battle Masters


@theshep You must be kidding. The Rules of Battle Masters holds on 5 pages. This game was fucking easy! I played it for the first time when I was 13 years olds, and I caught up the rules pretty quickly.

Starcraft the Board game? You can't compare that nerdy game full of thousands of rules to Battle Masters!!! (a game made for kids)

3 years, 4 months ago on Board James Battle Masters


@JulianMartinezOrgaz Good: you saved your time and your money. Warhammer is and endless sinkhole that will engulf all your money and take all your fucking spare time... I'm glad I got out of it!

On the other hand, the universe is cool, (Warcraft actually ripped off everything from GW's univere), and you should try the novels, they're awsome!

3 years, 4 months ago on Board James Battle Masters


@MarcusOppidus Warhammer fast?????? It takes one hour to get all your friends to unpack their armies from their suitcases, and check once again their army list.

One more hour to deploy your army on the battlefield.

One hour to start playing

One hour because it's already 4 o'clock and everybody needs a break.

and when it get's around 6 or 7 in the evening, and that the number of units are declining (which accelerates the game, since their are less models to move) , the battle finaly finishes... and you've spent your entire saturday afternoon playong just a single warhammer battle... this is one of the reason that made me quit playing that game (the main reason was actually the money... )

Don't listen to James: Battle Masters is very easy to understand and very quick to play compared to Warhammer...

3 years, 4 months ago on Board James Battle Masters


@JulianMartinezOrgaz It's actually more like a crude version of Advance Wars.

3 years, 4 months ago on Board James Battle Masters


@DonSkiver This game is actually a Warhammer game made by Games Workshop during the 90's. It was targeting kids and trying to get them acquainted with the general meccanics of the game and the background of the universe... most of the kids at that time started playing Battle Masters before passing to Warhammer... I know this, it happened to me...

3 years, 4 months ago on Board James Battle Masters


This game was made by Games Workshop and edited by MB. It actually takes place in the Warhammer fantasy world and it's a very, very simplified game compared to what are the true Warhammer battles!

I got this game on my christmas 1994 when I was still a kid in High School. I previously had Hero Quest for Xmas 1991 but when this game came out, I just wanted this one: it looked so much like hero quest but with so much models and huge battles in perspective!

When I got to Secondary school, I met some guys who where actually playing the Warhammer battle game, and I said "wow, this looks just like that Battle Masters game I own, but in so much sophisticated!". And they told me: "no wonder: Battle Masters is a Warhammer game for kids! If you want to play true battles, you've got to pass on the upper level and start playing Warhammer."

An this is what I actually did...

I don't actually understand what James found difficult to understand in this game: it's easy as shit.

3 years, 4 months ago on Board James Battle Masters