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"Strangers are not entitled to an explanation from you about your preferences".  Well said, Christelyn.  Really enjoyed this talk session.

1 week ago on In Case You Missed It: BB&W Live Discussion on the High’s and Low’s of Online Dating

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He needs to be fixed so that he cannot father any more children. Otherwise, why would Iyanla waste time with this man-child?  Anything for ratings, I guess.

1 week ago on Iyanla Can NOT Fix This Man’s Life! I Just #Cant with These Silly Women Who Think They’re “Special!”

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Wow.  Congratulations!!  Nice looking couple.  Looking forward to seeing the wedding pictures from Vegas.  

1 week ago on BB&W’s Very Own ‘EarthJeff’ is Getting Hitched!!

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Sadly there are whole segments of the Black community which are damaged beyond repair.  If you can afford to leave, do so.  You cannot educate or change dumb people who think that "acting white" is an actual thing.  Dr. King spoke proper English and was well educated so this whole "acting white" foolishness must be fairly new.  My Black friends and family members are proud of Black excellence and don't associate being smart with being White at all.  

1 week ago on How Blackistanis Police Their Own: Girl Gets a Beat Down for “Acting White” (And Being Too Light)

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Congrats to them!  Lovely couple and what a beautiful wedding!

1 week ago on Video: You Tubers, Shelly and Michael Tie the Knot!

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Absolutely lovely! Congrats on their baby- to-be. Love that she was willing to live overseas to be with her man. She sounds like a very happy woman.

1 week, 2 days ago on Paula Cooper Trajkovski Takes On Macedonia – And Wins!

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So sorry to hear about Anita's murder by her own son.  May she RIP.

1 week, 2 days ago on DBRs Abound – A True Murder In The First

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Not really a fan of Russell Brand but I've moved in the opposite direction from Christelyn. For years (since 2008) I've been registered as Independent but this summer switched to Democrat.  Fits who I am and while the Dems are far from perfect, for me they are better than the alternative.  


I never watch Fox News so nothing featured there could sway me one way or the other.


Hope y'all are having a relaxing Labor Day.

2 weeks, 1 day ago on I’m So Glad Russell Brand Opened His Big, Fat, Mouth. Proof the Many Liberals Practice Soft Bigotry

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Go on with your bad self, EmpressNK!  Nice story.  Good luck with Mr. Good Looking but not quite sober.

2 weeks, 6 days ago on UK Girl’s Response to Skinny Pickings for Swirling Across the Pond

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Wow, Christelyn, you always give great advice.  I especially love how you advise the Letter Writer to refrain from blaming her White boyfriend for whatever racism has happened in the past, is happening now, or will happen in the future.  I'm not sure what "race talk" she wants to have with her boyfriend.  I assume that talking about race may pop up from time to time in any relationship (as such talks pop up between two Black spouses).


However, the whole point of dating is to have fun.  Have fun, fun and more fun.  We are not our race (just as India Arie reminded us that we are not our hair) so it doesn't make sense to put a lot of emphasis on the fact that you are Black and your boyfriend is White.  I would focus more on what you have in common.  As Christelyn points out having values in common is really what relationships are about.  


Good Luck!

3 weeks, 2 days ago on (Bonus) QOTW: “How Can I Talk About My Culture with My White Boyfriend?”

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So now BBW is a matchmaker?!!  


Nice.

1 month ago on Two BB&W Fans Sitting in a Tree…Real Life Meeting on Two Regulars. Sparks?

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Loved him in Bicentennial Man and One Hour Photo.


So sorry to hear of his death.  

1 month ago on Open Thread: Share Your Favorite Robin Williams Moments

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@FriendsofJay @Browncow Your question is kind of ironic since so many Black women have children out of wedlock, which means that Black men must have fetishized them, i.e., only wanted them for sex.

1 month ago on As Millennials Support Dating Out, the Black Community ups the “Fetish” Rhetoric

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@Browncow You should offer your story and beautiful wedding picture to THE ROOT so that they can publish a positive story about BW/WM relationships.  Surely they must know that thousands of relationships such as yours exist where White men love and respect their Black wives.  

1 month ago on As Millennials Support Dating Out, the Black Community ups the “Fetish” Rhetoric

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@Vivaforever Good point, although more and more BW are dating out and ignoring the haters.  Common sense will let you know whether a man is with you just for sex or whether he wants a committed relationship.  It's a matter of having standards and vetting the men you let into your life to ensure that they meet those standards.  


I'm also dying for the day when BW stop listening to the negative talk which is solely focused on deterring them from dating out.  


P.S.  Isn't it interesting that Asian women have no problem dating and marrying White men in huge numbers despite claims that they are fetishized?  Black women should take note of that.

1 month ago on As Millennials Support Dating Out, the Black Community ups the “Fetish” Rhetoric

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Not surprised that such a negative article was on THE ROOT.  I assume that such articles are targeted at keeping Black women on the plantation while Black men are free to mate out to their heart's content.  Thankfully, scores of Black women are ignoring the negative messages and going for love.

1 month ago on As Millennials Support Dating Out, the Black Community ups the “Fetish” Rhetoric

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@tonyrog I love her wedding dress -- so unique.

1 month ago on Video: BB&W Fan Get Married, Serenades Groom; Bring Him to Tears

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@Oaktown Paul  @marie_christine2 @Penny Cute!  Looks like you went to an all-Black school. 

1 month ago on Video: BB&W Fan Get Married, Serenades Groom; Bring Him to Tears

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She has such a beautiful voice -- rivals Etta James' version.


All the best to them.

1 month ago on Video: BB&W Fan Get Married, Serenades Groom; Bring Him to Tears

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Nice!  What a way to expand one's worldview.  Every young BW should travel and experience other cultures.

1 month ago on Black Girl Travel Sponsors Georgia Teen’s First International Trip

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@Morenika Baisden actually asked such an asinine question?  Wow.  I'm glad he's off the air.  

1 month, 1 week ago on Blackistani Light Skinned Privilege: Aren’t You Glad You’re Free of It?

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@Lisa_Lisa There are several positive articles about Black women and non-Black men here.  I don't think there is an imbalance towards DBR-focused articles such as this one.

1 month, 1 week ago on Blackistani Light Skinned Privilege: Aren’t You Glad You’re Free of It?

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Well if Black women, dark or light, are stupid enough to attend such parties, what can I say?  I have little to say to grown folk who do stupid things.  You have to love yourself and stop allowing yourself to be demeaned and then these types of parties will disappear.

1 month, 1 week ago on Blackistani Light Skinned Privilege: Aren’t You Glad You’re Free of It?

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Wonderful photos -- especially of the now departed Mum.  All the best to this beautiful couple.

1 month, 1 week ago on Swirling and Marriage: 2014 Couple of the Year

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I'm very happy about the way this case turned out.  "Her life mattered" was her Mother's reaction to the verdict, which pretty much sums up how I feel.

1 month, 1 week ago on Feelings About Renisha McBride…

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Lovely story. Wish them wall the best!

1 month, 1 week ago on #OnlineDating Success…She Made the First Move.

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Very mature Letter Writer.  It took me until I was in my 40s before I finally went natural. It sometimes can be a difficult decision. Even now my Mother feels that going natural is some kind of Black activist/political statement.  


His girlfriend may get negative push back from her family, but there are so many Black women embracing their natural hair now (and so many websites/blogs which promote this) that she should be okay if she decides to go that route.


Good luck to the Letter Writer.  Sounds like a nice young man.

1 month, 1 week ago on QOTW: “How Do I Tell My Girlfriend I Love Her Natural Hair?”

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Not going to watch such poison. But I agree that BW need to know that expanding their options is a must. Even if such idiotic BM didn't exist, there still wouldn't be enough for all the eligible BW. Videos like these are just a push in the right direction for sensible BW.

1 month, 1 week ago on Blatant Rejection of “Traditional” Looking Black Women. See for Yourself Why Expanding Your Options is Necessary.

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Me too. I'm. a true romantic!

1 month, 2 weeks ago on Writer Reads “Swirling,” and Is Overwhelmed with Tears. Find Out Why.

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"I do not at all want this guy that I’m falling for to play any role as a father, I imagined having a relationship with him that was separate to my family life."


That doesn't seem possible when you are raising twins.  I wish the Letter Writer all the best although I agree with Christelyn's tough love approach. 

1 month, 2 weeks ago on #NWNW: Don’t Look for the New Man to Clean Up the Mess.

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Chic couple.  Wishing them a long and happy married life.

1 month, 3 weeks ago on Love It! Couple I Interviewed for Loving Day 2014 Tied the Knot!!

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Very sad situation.  I hope justice is done.

1 month, 3 weeks ago on Gotta Say Something Because This is Inexcusable: Eric Gardner Didn’t Have to Die for 50 Cents.

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@ElLagoJeff I suppose they are paid like the Real Housewives. Otherwise, I can't see why you want your business all out there in public.  

2 months, 1 week ago on Why “Marriage at First Sight” Is the Worst Thing to Happen to TV Since “Who Wants to Marry a Millionaire”

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What the Cuss indeed! I don't know how reality tv can get worst.

2 months, 1 week ago on Why “Marriage at First Sight” Is the Worst Thing to Happen to TV Since “Who Wants to Marry a Millionaire”

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Phaedra is a beautiful, well-educated woman.  I don't understand why out of the billions of men on this planet, she chose a criminal to marry and have children with.  While I have sympathy for those two gorgeous boys, I have none for her and her jailbird hubby.  I gather that she'll divorce Nida while he's in jail because I don't see what sense it would make for her to wait 8 years for him. 

2 months, 1 week ago on RHOA Demonstrates How Some Black Women Waste Their Potential on Shifty Men

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Great advice, Christelyn (as usual).


Even if she didn't find his CPT joke to be funny, she should have just shrugged it off and kept it moving.  Everyone tells corny jokes from time to time.  We really shouldn't read too much into that.


I don't understand her questioning whether he dated Black women because he was "derogatory" towards his mother.  What does that even mean?


She sounds as if she has deep seated issues and needs to work those out before she goes on any dating site.  I have a feeling that she has issues with men in general and not just White men.  He just happened to be the unlucky guy this time around.

2 months, 1 week ago on Ladies, Do NOT Date Interracially if You’re Too Suspicious of White Men. Please. Just…Don’t. (Letter)

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@Christelyn I've heard Black men say they have a preference for lighter skinned women.  No problem.

2 months, 1 week ago on Open Thread: “How Do I Explain My Preference for Black Women without Sounding Like a Douche?”

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I don't see anything wrong with simply saying that you like darker complexions.  There are tons of men who proudly proclaim that they prefer blondes or brunettes or redheads. It's really not that deep to like a certain type.

2 months, 1 week ago on Open Thread: “How Do I Explain My Preference for Black Women without Sounding Like a Douche?”

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@Vivaforever How do you know that the Black woman got into a physical altercation with him?  Beyond his baseless claim, are there any witnesses?  Why didn't he call the police?  I don't believe a word he says.

2 months, 1 week ago on Why I Have Mixed Feelings About the Firing of the Co-Host of the “Opie & Anthony” Show

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@ttyl203 This was not the first time that Cumia has made anti-Black comments.  My only question is why did Sirius XM decide to fire him for this particular incident.  Maybe it was the final straw breaking the camel's back.  Will be interesting to see who replaces him.

2 months, 1 week ago on Why I Have Mixed Feelings About the Firing of the Co-Host of the “Opie & Anthony” Show

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Cumia was fired for using racist language, not for whatever that Black woman did (or did not do) to him.  Yes, I consider it a win.  Let his racist butt find another forum, which I'm sure he will.  I have no problem with racist speech being relegated to a tiny corner where racists can shout among themselves, i.e., Stormfront.  Siruis XM had the right to make a business decision and fire someone who was hurting their bottom line or who they found to be embarrassing for his racist rants.  


And while the Black woman in question is being portrayed as a fighter by Cumia, I have no reason to believe what he alleged is true.  Why didn't he call the police if she threatened to beat him up or if she actually assaulted him?  Good riddance to him.

2 months, 1 week ago on Why I Have Mixed Feelings About the Firing of the Co-Host of the “Opie & Anthony” Show

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@JanayeMc That's exactly how I felt when I read his letter.  The best course of action is to be upfront and blunt with any woman he is dating and ask her point black whether or not she really wants a Black man and if he is just her Plan B.  


Of course, we all know that there are some Black women who may only consider a non-BM if they cannot get themselves a BM.  But obviously there are scores of Black women who date and marry non-BM men because that's who makes them happy and that's who've they've fallen in love with.


The Letter Writer sounds as if he's stereotyped all Black women and is seeking some magical response from Christelyn to calm his nerves, which she cannot do since she cannot speak for all Black women.


I wish him luck though. 

2 months, 2 weeks ago on Austin, TX Man Asks, “Am I the Black Woman’s Second Choice?”

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A fool is born every day. BW need to use common sense and recognize that it will be BM who benefit from polygamy. This is sad.

2 months, 2 weeks ago on Open Thread: Hotep-Dude’s Idea of a Legit Harem….You Know, for ‘Black Unity’

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@Law Wanxi Interesting. I saw nothing to flame in your comment.  Hope he does well despite his autism. I'm sure he'll get the best medical treatment in the UK given their healthcare system.

2 months, 3 weeks ago on This Brown Baby is Oxford Bound! 8 Year Old Makes University History

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Wow. Such an uplifting post!  Congrats to the very young Dr. Beckford.  Hope to hear about his successes as time goes by.

2 months, 3 weeks ago on This Brown Baby is Oxford Bound! 8 Year Old Makes University History

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Beautiful!  Love the colors.  


Wishing them a long and happy marriage.

2 months, 3 weeks ago on Another BB&W Reader Success Story! Remember April & Henry? They Got Hitched!

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