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Thank you! I've heard this uttered by men on this forum and others. One actually spoke of a black woman sticking up for him and another about black women not expecting much. It's offensive. Strong as it's often used to describe black women is something different than it is for women of other races. That's why it's offensive (to me).
4 days, 3 hours ago on “Dear White Guys Who Like Black Women, Please Stop Saying This…”
Just a suggestion, what about reporting on news concerning black women, profiles, etc?
2 weeks, 4 days ago on Open Forum: Community Brainstorm Session
@Lisa_Lisa @tracyreneejones @darkandlovely Problem is, cheating isn't rare. In fact, a slight majority of men cheat (statistically). So I personally don't think that vetting will save a woman from infidelity. In fact, the only way to guarantee you won't get cheated on is to stay single.
3 weeks, 5 days ago on If It Can Happen to Amber Rose…..Why That Marriage Certificate Makes All the Difference in the World
@KingsDaughter Like father, like daughter.
3 weeks, 6 days ago on Do We Give Female Domestic Violence Abusers a Pass?
Do female abusers get a pass? To put it simply, YES.
I'm happy that she decided to leave him since so many stick it out. She showed her son, and other women that she will not tolerate disrespect...more power to her. I didn't really like or respect her before but I do now. And yes, the marriage certificate makes a difference. If you become a rich guy's baby momma without the ring, you are pretty much dependent on how kind he is should you break up (admittedly, I'm no expert on family law).
3 weeks, 6 days ago on If It Can Happen to Amber Rose…..Why That Marriage Certificate Makes All the Difference in the World
Wow, this is definitely great news...
1 month ago on Another Online Dating Success! Yes; They Met on AfroRomance.
Ok, so a black man admits that many black men intentionally impregnate black women to lower their stock. My question is, what's it going to take for black women to wake up to this sobering fact and stop allowing this to happen????
1 month ago on Black Man Admits Hood Dudes Corrupt Black Women’s Wombs Through Sabotage, But Stops Short on “Swirling” Option
Kudos to Shonda Rhimes for putting it back to the ww critic. More "putting it back" needs to be done.
1 month, 1 week ago on Shonda Rhimes Hands NY Times WW Writer Her Hindquarters on Social Media
I hear you but I read another article that he was asked for ID and showed it to the cops. If true, that's why he wasn't cuffed.
1 month, 2 weeks ago on Update on Danielle Watts: BB&W Exclusive Interview with Boyfriend, Brian
This is why on the last thread I said I'd wait to hear their side of the story. On FB, it was said that they looked as though they were doing more than kissing and if it looked like something more, I can't blame anyone for thinking there was prostitution going on especially since most couple keep the heavy and hot stuff behind closed doors. So I can't cry foul against the LAPD on this one and not even the one who called police. With that said, I hope that Danielle has a bright future and I wish her much success in Hollywood. Thank God she wasn't seriously injured or killed by the cops. Nothing wrong with showing your ID especially if the cops were called to the scene.
Ok this is all over my FB newsfeed. All I gotta say is I've got to listen to their side of the story. Too much info, or misinfo is floating around.
1 month, 2 weeks ago on Celebrity Interracial Couple, Daniele Watts and Partner Detained by L.A. Police Who Mistook Her for Hoe and Her “John”
I dunno. You are probably right but I don't know if that applies to a lot of white men, lol
Ok, I just read two different articles stating they were not randomly approached by the LAPD but that someone called the cops on them. I hope they comment on that whether or not that's true. Here is one of the articles, second paragraphs http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2755113/Django-Unchained-actress-claims-handcuffed-detained-police-mistaken-prostitute-kissed-husband.html?ito=social-facebook
The police were still wrong but if in fact they were called, that means they did not randomly stop a black woman kissing a white man assuming she's a prostitute. Can't wait for the interview.
To clarify, I meant could the actress still sue if she refused to show ID.
Consider tweeting your concerns https://twitter.com/LAPDHQ
Can they sue since she refused to show ID? Are there a lot of black prostitutes in the area? IR couples with black female partners? Was this just a kiss or hot and heavy? NOT blaming them at all just trying to figure out what possessed that cop to question them other than pure racism. I can't wait to hear what her boyfriend was saying to the police officers because I only see her in handcuffs. How did he defend her?
Often not told I meant...
Agreed. I personally think that most gender minded black women are fully aware that they are vulnerable. That's the whole point, we are victims too. Our stories aren't often told in favor of what happens to black men.
Good advice. She should let go and move on. There are plenty of good looking hotties out there to form serious relationships with. No need for her to feel inferior. After all, he cheated on a pretty blonde girl with you and unfortunately, you are not the first woman he cheated with and likely not the last.
1 month, 2 weeks ago on “Did This White Guy Use Me for Sex?” Yeah; Probably. But Not Because You’re Black.
First I want to say that I'm currently not looking (keep going back and forth on that). But when I do decide to look, I will be excluding black men from my dating pool (not attracted). I am unapologetic about that. So, I don't feel that any black woman is wrong for excluding black men. It depends on motive. Example, I won't go into too much detail but there was one white guy from my past that had I continued anything with him, I would have ended up a victim of domestic violence. He never hit me but he did get mad at me and hurled a few insults. I need to mention again that he's white. To make a long story short, I was NOT ABOUT to stick around to see if he would actually hit me. Did I mention he's white? My point is, it is a strategic mistake to assume that just because a man is white (or nonblack) he's less likely to display ratchet behavior. He might just be better at hiding the evidence. He may want marriage before children, be educated, good job, or whatever. But there are some things that we cannot assume won't happen because he's white. White women are victims of DV, white husbands cheat big time (I've been solicited many times by married white men), maybe he doesn't have kids by his side piece but he might have paid for a couple of abortions...get my drift?
Ones motive for excluding black men should not be based on behavior. How is that different from saying black women have attitudes so no man should date them? Date/marry who you want or exclude who you want. Just understand that motives are key and you could be setting yourself up for a huge disappointment if you think white and other nonblack men are angels. No, I'm not saying these things to defend black men but to encourage black women not to let their guard down for their own sake.
1 month, 2 weeks ago on QOTW: “Am I Wrong to EXPLICITLY Exclude Black Men from My Dating Pool?”
@SuaveNorwood @PoetOfDarkness @CassieM12345 I'd say a good number of young black men egg on the cops. Not PC to tell that truth. But it will set us free.
1 month, 2 weeks ago on Black Militants Call ESPN Journalist, Jemele Hill “Race Traitor”; “Bed Wench” for Calling Out Ray Rice Disparity
@PoetOfDarkness @CassieM12345 Did you ask them if black men egged on the police when they are beaten or killed by one.
Now they're attacking a member of the model minority? That says a lot.
1 month, 2 weeks ago on “You’re Not a F*cking American” Cop Video Leads to $150k Settlement
@lindsaynagle That's what I meant. Latino men are a safe option for black women and Asian women are a safe option for white men. I personally don't think the feminine ideal applies since we are talking about men and women rather than how black women are viewed vs Asian women. Men don't have to live up to a feminine ideal, LOL. If so, we'd all be in trouble. LOL
1 month, 3 weeks ago on And We Wonder Why More Non-Black Men Don’t Approach Us?
Not really. The Latinos most black women are willing to date are the mestizos and those from Puerto Rico, Cuba, some of whom have distant black ancestry. etc. They aren't necessarily speaking of those of pure white Ancestry (Spain or Argentina, etc).
I'm guessing the willingness to date Latinos is the same as wm willing to date Asian women.
@dani-BBW And you'd think black women would get a clue from statistics alone.
I'm speaking from my own experiences. I realize that other people of color can be more racist than whites, but I have found that Latino men are NOT known for their fear of black men. All one has to do is look at the LA or even NY gang situation to see the evidence. No I am NOT implying that gang members are viable mates but just using them as an example because I didn't know what other example to use. So if a woman wants to avoid the intimidation factor, Latino men appear to lack that. Again, from my experiences. I'm not saying this to put white men down but they do appear to be a bit too fearful at times. They also don't seem to go to bat for each other like black men do.
On the flip side I can certainly understand why some white men avoid black women due to being heart broken and I don't blame them. That's why as shallow as it sounds, white men interested should choose black women that actually prefer white men. Not those who are simply open to IR but prefer it. Such women are less like likely to break your heart because you are not an option but a first choice. And no, it does NOT mean that she loves you only for your color. It means that she wants love, companionship, and life with someone who looks like you.
How do we know he's not standing on something? Whatever the case, I think that fear had nothing to do with the shooting.
1 month, 3 weeks ago on How Could a Man as Tall as Darren Wilson Have Feared Michael Brown’s Height?
@FriendsofJay Not surprised, LOL. Seriously, though...the video implies that black women have this constant built in rage that keeps us unhappy. I don't find that to be the case.
2 months ago on It Takes A Miracle For A Black Woman To Smile!
2 months ago on How Yours Truly Played Cupid with New Power Couple, Film Maker Chris Silber and Dr. Misee Harris
This is absolutely fab advice!
2 months ago on UK Girl’s Response to Skinny Pickings for Swirling Across the Pond
Just playing devil's advocate, at what point should a black woman realize that she should listen to and respect that her rainbeaux might have an opinion that differs from hers? She doesn't have to agree of course. But is there a time when we have to accept that our separate experiences growing up in our respective races might lead us to different conclusions and it isn't about being racist?
2 months, 1 week ago on How to Talk to Your Partner About Racially-Charged Issues
@Beautee_85 @RhondaSpeights @Daisy_inthe_Field Metallica \m/ As for people judging, sometimes you just have to tell them where to go.
2 months, 1 week ago on Ask a White Guy: The Online Dating Quandary
@Law Wanxi Not only does black not crack but Asian doesn't either.
@SirLoinDeBeef @caligirl94117 This is excellent advice. I've found that I have better luck out in the real world than online... Not sure why that is. Offline seems more natural and authentic to me. Techie events here I come... LOL
@AnneDunnCausey I believe that law abiding citizens are mostly at home. St. Louis is gang infested and I suspect they are the ones out in the streets for the most part.
2 months, 2 weeks ago on Black Woman Speaks The Truth About The Ferguson Riots!
@FriendsofJay The fact that a white male could walk around with a gun in Aurora, Colorado where a mass shooting took place (by a white male) without getting shot is mind blowing. I'm not anti white nor a black nationalist by any stretch of the imagination but this is a clear example of white male privilege.
2 months, 2 weeks ago on WHITE MALE PRIVILEGE AT ITS FINEST!
They look made for each other...
2 months, 2 weeks ago on Two BB&W Fans Sitting in a Tree…Real Life Meeting on Two Regulars. Sparks?
@KatBranson I don't see an email in your profile. Can you send your website via my feedback page (not sure if we are connected on fb). Please don't post it here because I want to stay on topic and will delete the comments.
@KatBranson Out of curiosity, are you a professional editor?
This incident happened a few days before Eric Garner's death. http://m.nydailynews.com/new-york/brooklyn/nypd-officers-drag-naked-brooklyn-woman-apartment-video-article-1.1889292
But we are only now hearing about it now. There is said to be a huge march in Garner's behalf across the Verenzano Bridge this month. There was a black woman that died in police custody some months ago with very little outrage. What I find unsettling is how the amount of outrage at Foster's piece when she never said that Garner didn't deserve justice nor did she wish his family ill will. As I mentioned on FB, I've seen more outrage over Foster's piece in the black blogosphere than I have at the NYPD. While I would not have mentioned Garner, I respect that I am simply going to have to agree to disagree with many bloggers whom I have great respect. One thing we can all agree on is that the NYPD gets away with a lot of horrible things against citizens of color and increasingly white people. As outraged as some might be over Kim Foster, remember she killed or planted drugs on no one. Anybody willing to demonstrate in front of the precinct?
2 months, 4 weeks ago on Latest News of NYPD Brutality PROVES You Can’t Be “Neutral” When it Comes to Police Abuse
@Christelyn @LorMarie And I'm sure there are some great non colorist black men out there. But the magnitude of this makes me reject them all, romantically. It disgusts me to the point that I don't respect black men as a group. Only certain individuals.
2 months, 4 weeks ago on Blatant Rejection of “Traditional” Looking Black Women. See for Yourself Why Expanding Your Options is Necessary.
And this is the reason why I will carefully suggest to my light skinned, "good-haired", mixed race, "trophy" daughters that they not get involved with black men romantically. This anti-bw colorist sentiment is probably more common than not and I can't respect them. No, I don't look like Lupita but how dare you say she's not datable! And no, I don't care if it appears that I am doing the same.
I meant writer's situation.
3 months ago on #NWNW: Don’t Look for the New Man to Clean Up the Mess.
@Julie It's not about hating your kids...it's about not liking them at times. Big difference.
3 months ago on Conversation @ http://www.empoweringparents.com/Sometimes-I-Dont-Like-My-Child.php
Amen, Brenda55. You articulated exactly what I think of the reader's situation.
@liloulilou @LorMarie That's it in a nutshell for me, no intentions of converting or raising my children as Muslims. I think it might be culture. I don't even trust Arab Christians to be anti-racist.
3 months, 1 week ago on Ladies, Be VERY Careful Dating Ethnic Men. Parents and Family Often Come First
oops, I meant I'm surprised that latinos would be more biased than white families.