Pushing through to the present, and trying not to fart in public.
@AngusMcMahan1 Fixed! After 220k words in a year, even after the third read (I really do this) I miss stuff. I'm just the creative - a horrible editor. In fact, the book I'm putting together now is going to be solely edited by readers, since I am not to be trusted. Ha. Thanks for pointing that out.
2 years, 1 month ago on She Liked My Whole “Look” (But I Never Showed Her My Bluetooth)
@Natalie the Singingfool Yes, but I contend it still would have been hilarious.
2 years, 1 month ago on I Almost Ate One of Your Kidney Stones
@Nicole Mojan Hey, you're pretty so I would've eaten the stone. The idea of menstrual blood on the stone though was a huge turn off. I would have soaked it in bleach to return it to it's natural color first.
@KateHall Yes, but honest!
@MsCheevious @tfpHumorBlog I was teasing. Just get me a job punching up jokes for a sitcom and we'll call it a day. Nothing in prime time, though. I'm too dirty.
2 years, 2 months ago on Promote Your Blog on My Blog Right Now – Take IV
@Katjaneway Fine - you win. I'll stop doing that. (I actually stopped dumping it in garbage bags the day after the post)
2 years, 2 months ago on I’ve Started Dumping Water In Garbage Cans
@Dei Starr I am superior, Dei! Thank you for recognizing this!
@Juststuff3 Jeez - now you're just making me feel bad. Stop doing that!
@JanineHuldie1 I should go Dyson next time. That British dude just sounds like he knows what he's doing.
2 years, 2 months ago on I Nearly Did The Wrong Thing With a Vacuum
@emmaddoesit Not really - just had nothing else to write about tonight. I'm an alchemist! (oh yeah, and really smart for using the word alchemist!)
@knightndaze You're not wrong.
@Terese Lavallee You had no excuse to miss the NonCon! Oh well, I still am glad you read my crap. Next year you must come to BlogHer Chicago. No excuse!
2 years, 2 months ago on Prepping For The NonCon
@Throat_Punch Thanks Jenners! I put in a thing to speak at BlogHer in Chicago so we'll see if they greenlight it. I'm still blown away by how crazy popular you've become. Not that you shouldn't be - it's just great to see someone nail it. Glad we're buds.
Still laughing at you for that time you were going to password protect your RSS feed. Hilarious.
@dp_ginadee226 Thanks for reading.
@TRfromRL Would you finally put a photo in your LiveFyre icon? I'm tired at not looking at you! :)
@Natalie the Singingfool The audience is what you really can't control. Just put your head down and write. If it entertains you, that's what is important. I only write to make myself feel good. Many times I'm not sure if others like it or not. I hope they do, but I seek to mostly entertain myself.
@KateHall You are a such a great reader of mine and I really appreciate you taking the time to comment so often. I'm serious. Thank you.
@ModMomBeyondIndieDom Wow, thanks Linda! I just submitted a presentation for BlogHer with a few other guys, so we'll see if they bite. It is a really fun idea we came up with.
@Joshua Wilner/A Writer Writes You know, I was going to, but decided against it. I'll probably write a post on what I spoke about, or, simply do a video about it. Thanks for asking!
@ViolaFury RebelMice is a new one for me. Googling now. Glad to have you back!!!!!!!!!!1
2 years, 2 months ago on Pre-NonCon Awesomeness
@Weidknecht Ditto, Lisa!
@MicheleLeAnn I've seen one like that. No joke.
2 years, 2 months ago on She Wore The P, I Wore The V
@KatrinaDaviesHutchesson Glad to have done it! You have the most Australian name ever, by the way.
@jeneralinsanity Women dig reach arounds?
@inthemomlight Oh right, you are tiny! I forgot. I wish you were able to have been there, too.
@jesintheworld @KareDiane You too need to start a support group called "We're Really Bored So We Make Up Phobias" - at least you'll have each other!
2 years, 2 months ago on These Goddamn Butterflies Better Land On Me!
@KareDiane Okay, but since there's no way for them to hurt you, this one is about you being nuts. Man up and get thyself to the Butterfly House. You will not die and the world will not collapse. I promise.
@brigidday Been there many times. They do land on you there! I'm only a few miles away so I'll head over there every few years. Great call!
@Ginger Kay I KNOW. There should be a sign that says "Butterflies will probably not land on you because they've been trained by our staff to leave guests alone. It's not personal and they love you just the same."
@_Mediocrates I saw mine stalk and kill a housefly recently. It was funny. Butterfly would make me sad. Ha.
@Katjaneway Hilarious. Probably a good idea to q-tip out the ear cheese every now and then.
@lcarilo I grew up in Peoria so I only associate them with the big company that employees the whole town. I feel like for every butterfly I saw growing up I saw 25 moths. Horrible ratio.
@Katjaneway I am a fish person and they're really not that weird. Just nerds.
@knightndaze I have a 55 gallon reef tank. So thanks. Funny enough, no joke, tonight I put it up on Craigslist. I've had reef fish and corals for many years and it's just all too much. A cat and a dog are plenty for me right now.
@AngelicArtwork Sorry - I can't believe I missed this before! What a compliment to lump me in with Jenny L. She's great. I actually found my girlfriend through her (sort of). Keep reading!
2 years, 2 months ago on Sometimes People On The Internet Are Real!
@Craziness Abounds I agree. Attitude is key. It's also something that I need to consciously work at.
2 years, 2 months ago on So, Apparently I’m a Deadbeat
@Craziness Abounds Yeah, I don't care about hair color either. Brains are more important - and colorful.
2 years, 2 months ago on Being Blonde Never Helped Me
Fine - I'm going gay!
@TRfromRL @Craziness Abounds Disagree, at least for me. After I've seen a woman naked, the idea of her being beautiful is not a huge deal anymore. I mean, I love attractive women but you have to possess a lot more than that for me to want to stick around. Being pretty just doesn't cut it.
@The Hipster Owl's Bookshelf Thanks for showing me double the love!
@ModMomBeyondIndieDom I'm no Johnny Depp, madame.
@Jammum I'm one of them!
@CiaraBallintyne Wait, husbands kiss their wives?
2 years, 2 months ago on Toenail Chewing = Surrender
@SrslyAmusing Same thing. Ha.
@inthemomlight What you're really talking about is control. All you have to do is give up control and you're free. The rub is that it's the scariest thing in the world to do.
@Ellen at Defenestrated Feet Explain your goofy behaviors. If you pick your teeth with discarded toenails, I will not be impressed.
@jessica2 Thanks, Jess!!!
@Katjaneway I never, never ever wash a dish before it goes into the dishwasher. Makes life so much easier. And more fun. I never know what's going to get cleaned!
2 years, 2 months ago on I Scored A Turkey Breast!
@pdk117 Remind me not to get into your car until it is thoroughly detailed.
2 years, 2 months ago on I Wish The Rest of the World Hated Sour Cream
@Prof. Torg I hope she's being hauled away to Bellevue as we speak. It's for her own good.