Bio not provided
@CollegeWolf Cuntler. Funny. If Matty Cassel shows us nothing these last three games and Jay Cutler is available... my thoughts exactly CW, why the hell not?
7 months, 1 week ago on Need a Quarterback? Why Not Cutler?
Ahhhh for fucks sake, whatever. For some stupid reason I still got my new Peterson jersey on, I'm a few double ryes in, and I'm gonna wear it to my kid's hockey game in about two hours. Of course I'll have a zip up sweater over top of it. I don't wanna look like I enjoy cock that much. No offence to you Packer fans out there...
8 months, 3 weeks ago on PJD's Game Thread: Vikings vs. Cowboys
@CollegeWolf Yeah but CW, he is ever handsome doing it though.
@CollegeWolf @terry1982 But we all gotta agree that this coaching staff is without a doubt the worse display of ineptitude that we have seen in years. Seriously, Frazier has surpassed Childress. That's unbelievable.
8 months, 3 weeks ago on PJD's Game 7 Recap: BREAKING NEWS - VIKINGS SUCK
@PJD @CollegeWolf Great statement. So true. Was watching the Jets game (NHL, don't wanna confuse anyone) had a few drinks in me already, flipped it over to the Vikes game just as Patterson was running it back for his touchdown. Threw my hands up, gave a little "okay here we go!", brought my hands back down, sat on the couch and said out loud ""what in the hell are they wearing?!" Didn't have another drink the rest of the night.
@Hammy1724 Honestly, are we really gonna sit down and watch this game tonight? Oh gosh the game's starting. Pass the rye.
9 months ago on Masturbatory Game 6 Preview: Primetime Suck-Off
Frazier. I wanna love you man I really do. Show me something.
@James Scott1 This Vikings team is gonna force me to start watching NASCAR. Even the crashes in NASCAR got nothing on this explosion of garbage we get to witness with the Vikings every Sunday.
9 months, 1 week ago on PJD's Game 5 Recap: The Walking Dead, NFL Version
@fjionnna So does alcohol. That's why you always got to be sure to delete the spur of the moment videos you make on your phone before you kid finds 'em. 'Cause if you don't... oh goodness... the explanation you make up... it's awful.
Williams. Brutal. Nice call on that one. Musgrave... not even gonna start. It's obvious though that they're not even being pushed by their head coach. Can't even stand to look at Frazier any more. Remember when he was a great DC? Seems like that was forever ago. Hate seeing him on the sidelines. He's surpassed Childress in my books. How great would it look if we had that big fat walrus that's on KC's sidelines right now? We can only hope, PRAY, that the powers-that-be in the Vikings front office staff are already secretly making phone calls to some would be potential future coaching candidates. All for next year of course. I'm kind of excited just to see how bad this train wreck can really get.
I've been enjoying the wisdom of this informative blog for the past few years. Hell, I've even fired a couple off in mid read before. Honestly, how could you not? Seriously? But... I have never before felt the anger... literally the hatred, jumping off the screen like I did today. Well done sir. Sober when this was written Mr.PJD or did Mr.Crown Royal have a helping hand in your choice of words? If you were sober, that's scary. I love it.
10 months ago on PJD's Game Three Recap: Keeping That Winless Streak Alive!
@CollegeWolf I didn't see it either CW but here we are...
10 months ago on Purple Jesus Diaries Masturbatory Game Three Preview: Early Season Toilet Bowl
No game thread? What the frig?! I have to vent on a two day old blog?! Cock balls dammit. When's the press conference to announce the firing of that stupid lackluster fuck? Him and his borderline retarded coaching staff. Never mind, beyond borderline. Viktor and his head full of foam could do a better job those stack of gay only used dildos. I'm only eight beers in, this could get uglier later on. Thank goodness hockey season starts in 9 days.
@Hammy1724 Maybe just one one win against the Pack this year hey Hammy? I really don't wanna hear about how we got swept till next September. But if we do go down two, we gotta go down hard!
10 months, 1 week ago on Vikings Work Hard to Join Pantheon of 0-2 Teams
Interesting twist on things Mr. PJD. I never looked at it that way. Why blemish a perfect losing record? I like that analogy. In fact I just like spelling analogy 'cause I get to spell anal first.
@PJD @CollegeWolf Good golly what a suggestion! If that happened would the world explode? I think it just might.
10 months, 2 weeks ago on PJD's Game One Recap: Jury Still Out on Ponder?
Nothing left to say. The comments are all bang on and Mr. PJD your expertise in the journalistic department has left me so sexually aroused I'm wondering if I ever need to go to PuertoRicanTeens.com ever again 'cause goodness knows that one day, I'm gonna forget to erase the history. I'm out of market up here so even my buddies feel to terrible to cut me up about the loss. It's like they feel sorry for me. Like a death in the family. It's really pathetic. Watching that Niners/Packers was like a punch in the face. And not a good punch like a drunk donkeypunch but a "I'm sober taking a straight Bruce Lee shot straight to the nose" punch. Watching those quarterbacks manage their team and their coaches physically trying to will their team to victory was disheartening to watch. As for the purple pants... was able to stomach these ones. With two thick stripes going down the legs and a darker purple they don't look like leotards and a lot less gay. The white pants with white jersey was also pretty sharp as well. Oh please God help us all if they ever decide to go purple on purple.
"Taint to the glory hole". That was beautiful. As for Ponder, I'm nervous boys. Four weeks ago I was thinking 11-5, at least 10-6 but now... I know it's only preseason and Ponder doesn't have #28 beside him but... oh boy. Jennings might be showing signs of regret by the second quarter against the Lions. Don't like being nervous when it comes to football. When I'm nervous I drink. When I drink I go on the computer. When I drink and go on the computer I get brave and we all know what that leads to. Damn you Ponder.
10 months, 4 weeks ago on Is Greg Jennings Regretting His Move?
@Hammy1724 HA! Now these are the beautiful comments that I miss when I don't check in with the PJD team on a daily basis. Such a silly somma bitch am I.
1 year, 2 months ago on NFL Draft 2013 Open Thread: Hot Prime Time Day One Action!
@peterandkelsey @PJD Well said my friend. Almost poetic.
1 year, 6 months ago on PJD's Playoff Recap: A Tangled Webb
"Midnight to six". Love it. That's why I love this blog. Don't comment as much as I used to but, I am body waxing myself on a daily basis so, what am I gonna do? As for the game... ah fuck it. I was three beers in when I heard Ponder wasn't playing but thought to myself "maybe Webb can at least manage the game for us". Kept on drinking. Switched over to the Crown Royal right before kickoff. Here we go baby! Watched that first drive of ours. Got so excited I literally tugged one off right there on the couch. Poured another drink, and then saw Webb throw the ball up 10 feet in the air when he was getting sacked and thought "cock balls dammit". I too, was done drinking by halftime. That game was over before it started and we all knew it. Maybe that's why the pain isn't as bad as it usually is. Or maybe I'm just getting used to the big strap-on I gotta take at the end of every football season 'cause I live and die for a loser team. *sigh*
Okay team, white boy here just rediscovered Public Enemy and Anthrax "Bring the Noise" on YouTube. Don't even attempt to listen to it unless you have a good sound system. Anybody else got some old school YouTube ideas? When I'm juiced I always seem to throw on "99 problems". But that song makes no sense to me since it's "99 problems" and a bitch is 95 of them to me. That's not nice. I'm sorry. I mean 94. Football baby. Crown Royal baby. Everything's gonna be alright.
1 year, 7 months ago on Game Thread: Vikings vs. Texans Mini-Playoff Game 1A
@CollegeWolf Gotta get me one of those AD Nike shirts the family had.
@Qommie It scares me when you swear. I love it.
Wanna know what a good Sunday is boys (oh sorry Qomms) and girls? Is when your boy is done hockey till the new year, the Christmas shopping is done, and the girlfriend is out, with the boy, buying your last gift, leaving you alone to slam some Crown Royal and enjoy the Vikings kicking the piss out of the brokeback Texans. I think I'll pour myself another double Crown. Are we heading for the playoffs? "PLAYOFFS?" Good golly. I love me some Crown Royal.
Now, if we could only spread out the field... we got #TWO EIGHT and that's it. Gosh, we could have a dangerous offense. *sigh* Three weeks left and still a reason to watch Vikings football so that's a good thing. 18 year old girls who can't control their liquor and pass out after a few drinks that's also a good thing. "These are a few of my favorite things..." la la la...
1 year, 7 months ago on PJD's Game 13 Recap: Zero Collapses Equal a Noteworthy Event
@ndmover Don't apologize for drinking and posting. That's a prerequisite on this blog. Also it's good to have a hot, young Puerto Rican girl at your disposal. You know, just in case.
1 year, 7 months ago on PJD's Game 12 Recap: Stop Wasting Adrian Peterson's Career, I Beg You
What's left to say? I'm loving what I'm reading here. Mr. PJD is FIRED THE FUCK UP!! Love it! And the comments?! CW and Hammy are laying down some hardcore mother-fucking truth. I got nothing to add. I will tell you this though, I have never sworn so much during a Vikings game as I did yesterday. FUBARed, never read that in the form of a past tense verb. Nice. Fuckin' rights boys, truth got told today.
@PJD Oh my goodness. The things we look at when we're drunk and nobody's home. Good times.
1 year, 7 months ago on PJD's Game 11 Recap: Thankful the Vikings and Bears Game Ended
Happy belated Thanksgiving to you Yankee bastards. I've said this before, you guys do that holiday right. You got about 10 million Canadians across this country rushing through their work day just to get home to watch some after work football. That's beautiful. For that we thank you. Sunday's game? What else is there to say? Coaching, Ponder, I can't remember but did we even get a sack on Cutler? *sigh* Got kinda juiced on Sunday so I came looking for a game thread and then realized it was your Thanksgiving weekend. It wasn't so much that I wanted to talk about the garbage game that we just witnessed but more about the 80's and 90's tunes that could be recommended. Since there was no thread I think I just threw on some Bell Biv Davoe and some Journey and then passed out on the couch. I'm at the point right now that I don't care if those idiotic NHL sons of bitches ever come back. But my goodness, you don't realize how much you miss hockey until you turn on MNF and you're forced to watch Carolina and Philly.
Great win. Still don't like our coaching but I'm a patient man. Juiced right now but not quite shit-faced, but well on my way. I'm all over that Three Days Grace song Chalk Outline. I keep replaying it on YouTube. Two more drinks and it'll be nothing but 80's and 90's tunes. Oh yeah! Skol baby.
1 year, 8 months ago on Game Thread: Lions vs. Vikings Part Deux
@PJD Damn. Sorry fellas. I'll do the drinking for all of us. Jeez, I hate/love/hate Calvin Johnson.
Holiday tomorrow up here, I think it is for you guys too. Anyway, hitting the Crown Royal hard. Oh yeah! Got four buddies who are down at the game drunk texting me. I decided to stay home and put the money towards upgrading my house. What a fool I am. Crown Royal baby!
"Skipping through throwing motion" now that's funny. This blog always brings a smile to my face. Kinda like when I see four Asian women tied up to a Dodge Ram. I have no idea what that means. I'm sorry. Where's my medication?
1 year, 8 months ago on Dissecting Christian Ponder's Poor Quarterback Play in Pictures
I know I'm a day late here but I've been busy dismantling my Kevin Love traps I had set up on Wednesday night. Everything was a go until I found out he broke his hand and he wasn't even here. The man-crush, so bizarre. Speaking of man-crushes I know of one certain shirtless individual who got himself booted far off the island Thursday night. I agree Mr. PJD, let's not even discuss this joke of a game. I do however want to point out that in all my history of watching sports I have never physically seen the momentum shift right before my eyes like it did when Allen got that sack. The proverbial momentum needle went from Bucs to Vikes right there in front of us. I'm thinking "we're gonna win this game!" Then we go three and out. That puppy was cute. It made me smile. After the next debauchery of a game we play maybe write about a set of "puppies". It'll make me do more than smile.
1 year, 8 months ago on HAHAHA, THIS PUPPY DOES A HAND STAND WHEN EATING!!!!1!
@PJD @Hammy1724 Just thinking of her voice makes me wanna punch a small dog in the face. Sooooo annoying. But I do remember in high school borrowing White Men Can't Jump from a buddy and there's that part where she's wearing the short shorts and I think there was somewhat of a shower scene? Am I right? Anyway, I'd be lying if I said I didn't go through a few pairs of socks at that part of the movie. Of course that was 20 years ago and I guess being a lot younger I could see past the annoying voice for the first twenty times. Now, three times tops.
1 year, 9 months ago on Prepare Your Eyes for Vikings Stadium Design Porn
I like the last one because of yes, the viking ship resemblance. But it needs to be a little more "glassy". Now the first one is pretty cool too but it might be too "glassy". We'd have to hire a lot of illegal Puerto Ricans just to keep the glass clean. Hang on a second... I got an idea. What if we just hired only Puerto Rican women to clean the glass? And kept the age of employment from 16-24? Wait, 16 might be too young. We don't want any legal issues. Let's say 16 and a half. And no chubby ones. It has nothing to do with appearance it's just that we can't have that kind of weight on top of the glass. Sorry, it's a safety issue, and nothing more. It's settled, we're going with the first sketch. Let's get those shovels in the ground. Can't wait!
@CollegeWolf I droolz too much last week. Thought I should maybe go alcohol free this weekend. Wasn't to happy about it. I'll make up for it next Sunday.
1 year, 9 months ago on Game Thread: Titans vs. Vikings Afternoon Fun Fest
@PJD Harvin jersey. I think so.
@CollegeWolf CW with your 9 & 3 quarters everybody's cumming! Oh my goodness, I'm into the Bon Jovi... "Cause you were born to be my baby"... oh no...
1 year, 9 months ago on Vikings vs. Lions: PJD's Masturbatory Game Four Preview
@CollegeWolf LESSly, I love it. But, is our coaching staff actually "coming" around? Are they actually listening to us retards on this blog? Or are they just "cumming"? Interesting. Hmmm... We'll see next week. I love youtube when I've been drinking. We're talking Motley Crue to Metallica to Roxette to Chevelle to Iron Maiden to Katy Perry to Eminen to whatever... oh baby... maybe a little Starship? Oh gosh, I must be drunk...
About to crack beer #10. Listening to Skid Row on YouTube, and there's no game thread. The one time I check out the thread and it's not there. Shucks. Well, do I proceed or just stop right now? I'm lost. Hang on... Beer #11... getting to drunk to type so here it is... coaching staff looks good (about motherfucking time) sorry, I'm trying not to swear. Ponder, Harvin, AP, defense, hot damn we're looking good. But so would a 200lbs asian woman right now. Oh baby. Are we for real?! Man, these Buds are going down like water...
@PJD @Qommie Stop it. We all know and love Nick Lachey. I still remember back in the early 2000's leaving the bar at closing time with a nice 98 Degrees slow song playing in the background talking to (throwing up on) some hot classy girl (dirty skank) and asking (demanding) her to come back to my house. Where we would then proceed to fool around (pull her by her hair into the bathroom) and eventually have great sex (37 seconds of me getting what I want) and then we'd cuddle a bit and exchange particulars and plan to meet up again (bitch, I don't care what your name is! And why are you still here anyway? Didn't I give you $2 for bus fare?). Oh the memories...
1 year, 10 months ago on Jay Cutler and Kristin Cavallari: Still Doing SUPER Well
@Qommie Still anxiously waiting...
1 year, 10 months ago on PJD's Game Two Recap: Vikings Gonna Vike
@PJD @CollegeWolf "LESSlie is More" t-shirts?! You boys might be on to something there. If this ass pounding is gonna be as bad as we think it's gonna be we might have to get this thing rolling. Somebody get a hold of the "Fire Chilly" sign guy and tell him he's on standby. He's about to get busy.
@CollegeWolf Hung at 9 & 3 quarters and a comedic wit about you second only to Mr. PJD himself. Completely unfair to the rest of the men down there. That's beautiful CW.
@CollegeWolf LESSly. I like that CW. Nice.
@PJD Ass pounding, now even that might be an understatement.
@CollegeWolf Dink and dump. Ha, that's fun to say, and do. Ponder didn't exactly stretch the field yesterday but of course all Musgrave was calling for most of the second half was "hand off to Adrian so he can run up the middle into a wall of people, and then we'll do it again, and again..." Ponder did have his moments with Percy and Rudolph but of course those were mostly dink and dump (ha) passes. Hmm... gotta give him a few more games. Right? I might just be giving him the benefit of the doubt though just because I hate our coaching staff so much. You think Frazier even knows Ponder's first name? I never see him talking to him, or anyone for that matter. Just typing this angers up the blood. I thought my level of hatred for Childress was high, it's about to be surpassed.
No swearing for me today. No talking about Puerto Rican teens today. I was gonna attempt to not touch myself while reading this blog today but c'mon, I'm only human. Anyway, we've played 2 bad teams so far and we've won by 3 and lost by 3, that makes us a bad team. The first 54 minutes was so painful. The ending was enjoyable, however, you're right PJD, you just knew the Vikes were gonna Vike. As for the coaching staff... forget it. Why bother? It's too early in the season to do anything about it anyway. We're gonna see on Sunday a well coached team and a team that's feeds off the energy of it's head coach. Steam rolled is probably an understatement. My kid had hockey yesterday so I couldn't drink. Probably a good thing. I'll be drinking this Sunday though. I'll have to. We'll all have to. My goodness, it's gonna be ugly.
@PJD @Qommie O Canada... what a silly rule, a point for failing? C'mon eh? Beauty. Oh gosh, I'm finally sobering up from Sunday. Did we fire Frazier yet? Give him a couple more games? Where's my keys? Good heavens, CharmingGrump's picture is kinda creeping me out. I love it.
1 year, 10 months ago on Valuable Insight with The Gally Blog: Vikings vs. Colts
I'm well on my way to being juiced so here I am on the computer getting ready to search for some illegal Puerto Rican porn and I thought well hell, let's check in on PJD nation. Not a comfortable bunch we all are right now. But we'll take the win right? I guess? Now from what I gather most of you boys, and girls, (Qommie, wow, never would have thought, probably smoking hot but you can't tell from the comments section) anyway, most of you guys live in the Twin Cities area, so you would know better than I would the feeling people have about Frazier. I'm trying to like him 'cause I know he's a good person but damn, does he ever speak on the sidelines? Fuck. Performance reflects leadership and well... I don't know. You guys let me know what you think 'cause I'm thinking defensive coordinator yes, head coach no. About to crack beer number 9. Damn do I love football.
1 year, 10 months ago on Game Thread: Jaguars vs. Vikings Expectations Fest
@PJD I did, the second time around. Second time?! Oh geez...
1 year, 11 months ago on PJD's Preseason Game Three Recap: A Season Preview? | August
That reference to the Vikings game being compared to some hot Asian broad who turns out to be anything but was pretty bang on. Because um... well you know... um... alcohol... three in the morning... ummmm, yikes. That feeling doesn't come off in just one shower.
@PJD Since I haven't left the computer yet, I googled what you told me and there it was! What a gorgeous site to see! Thank you sir. It's a good thing I bet on the over. Our cheerleaders are starting to look a lot sexier lately. I remember in the early 2000's having to stare at pics of Redskins and Eagles cheerleaders just to get my fix. Hmm, maybe I'll head over to those sites right now...
1 year, 11 months ago on Packer Fans Bring You the Most Disgusting Thing You'll Ever See | August
I called in sick today and since I'm home alone you gotta figure the over/under on me tugging a few off in front of the computer would be 3.5. And then I read this article and it dropped down to .5. But then I read it again and the line jumped up to 5.5! Yikes I got issues. It's only 11:30am, I'm taking the over.
High school girls... *sigh* That's all I got to say today.
1 year, 11 months ago on LOLVikes at Training Camp 2012: Dazed and Confused | August
When I first read the picture I thought "Scott Hanson? From the NFL Network? I don't get it," then I kept on reading. La la la la. Then it hit me "Oh CHRIS Hansen!" Ha. Now that's funny. Mr. PJD, you're the king. Thank goodness Chris Hansen doesn't do a sting operation with 17 year old Puerto Rican girls. This blog would lose 95% of it's readers.
1 year, 11 months ago on LOLVikes at Training Camp 2012: To Catch a Shirtless Quarterback | August
@PJD Stewie Griffin in the middle there looking for a sausage party. Now that's a funny pic! You know it's not his first. Maybe his first outside the family but not his first.
1 year, 12 months ago on Packers Shareholding Meeting Was Biggest and Worst Ever | July
@PJD Well, I guess it's inevitable that they'd have have to team up once in a while. But you can tell by the look on Superman and Batman's faces that they're not to happy about it.
1 year, 12 months ago on Get to Know New Vikings Kicker Care Blair Walsh | July
@CollegeWolf Look at CW getting all worked up! I love it! The website I gamble on has the Vikes at 106-1 to win the Super Bowl and 34-1 to with NFC north. $20 on both? I know we're going 6-10 but hey, I'm a moron.
C'mon Walsh. The Flash?! Seriously? Have you seen his costume? That's one superhero who's just dying to come out of the closet. Have you ever seen him team up with any other superheroes? No. And now you know why.
Reese's Puffs? Is that the one with the bunny rabbit on the front or the one where the bird on acid flips out 'cause when he sees the cereal he goes out of control? Walsh, really?
LATINO DANCE MUSIC?! Well, I can't argue with that one. It seems to calm the Puerto Rican bitches down once they come to, oops, I mean wake up, after a night in which they "voluntarily" came home with me.
Doesn't like rock music?!... *sigh* Welcome aboard Walsh.
@PJD @honkeylips @Qommie Any woman who loves hockey and football is a dream come true in my eyes. Just as long as they are on the good side of 150lbs. 175 if I've been drinking.
1 year, 12 months ago on Great Moments In Vikings Music History | July
@HitandMissKarla @CollegeWolf @honkeylips Oh my goodness. For heaven's sake. Well, here's to the ladies who read and enjoy the debauchery written daily on this wonderful blog. Hats off to you. I'd say pants off to you but we don't need CollegeWolf walking around with his 9 and 3 quarters stealing all the Puerto Rican women and embarrassing the male Packer fans.
2 years ago on Great Moments In Vikings Music History | July
Since I don't live in Minny I can honestly say I'm pretty sure I've never heard that remix before. You know what? I'm diggin' it baby. And if i'm diggin' it now I can only imagine how horny it would have made me back then. Big Willie style, where you at? The world needs you.
Oh, and on a side note, I just read Friday's article with the the nice cheerleader pics. Anyway, as I was reading the comments I came across something that knocked me right the hell out... Qommie's a woman?!
When you impregnate a bitch through her ass and she eventually has her child, when they grow up, this is what they drive. And as for the Vikingmobile, that's gotta be Spielman's ride.
2 years ago on Packers Fans Drive in Style | July
Now that's some info that will lead to trouble. Oh yeah.
2 years ago on Vikings Teach Rookies Horrors of Strip Clubs | July
"Bust one off in her lazy eye," that's beautiful. That's why her eye is lazy, to many sperm shots. Kinda like Cutler and his pouty face. If you did a swab of his mouth I'm sure you'd find the DNA of about 50 different men. Remember those days boys living at the strip club? Falling in love with strippers and Hooters girls? The trouble we got into at these places with no money I can only imagine what it would be like walking in there with a wad full of 50's. Dirty bitches, gotta love 'em. Respect 'em? Well, that's a different story.
I thought that's how it all went down. Thanks for printing the truth, as always Mr.PJD. What's really funny is that we are in Houston TWICE this season. Maybe when we're down there Lezlie sends a few hard drinking, hooker beating, backup linemen into this bar at about 2am to talk to this "off-duty cop/security guard" mother fucker. A GLASS OF WATER is all he wanted you stupid Texas bitch! Fuck the Texans.
2 years ago on The Devil Took Over Purple Jesus' Body, Got Him Arrested | July
A day late but Happy USA Day eh. Just got loaded yesterday and I'm not even American. I did bang one though. She was from Cincinnati. Fuckin' Bengals. Parise AND Suter?! You bastards. HEY SPIELMAN, YOU TAKING NOTES?! Fuck, September is gonna be painful.
2 years ago on Today, Be Patriotic and Share Purple Jesus Diaries | July
I know I'm a day late here on this comment but that damn PuertoRicanTeens.com takes up all my time. Mr. PJD your dance montage made me piss my pants and for some reason that turned me on. That medication I'm taking obviously isn't working. It looks like Doogie H is actually laying into Elmo. I watched that clip for about two minutes straight. Getting that stadium deal done was a great excuse to drink last night even for out of town Canadian like me. Shoot, let's just keep this train rolling 'till tomorrow morning! What's this? I'm sitting in front of the computer and I'm fully clothed?! Gotta go.
2 years, 2 months ago on The Minnesota Vikings Will Be Getting Their New Stadium | May
@CollegeWolf@honkeylips Vegas obviously hasn't seen our secondary. Wow. This is like an early Xmas present.
2 years, 7 months ago on Purple Jesus Diaries' Game 13 Review: Excuses for Hip-Sters | December
@PJD@CollegeWolf I don't know if that's really a good thing. If I had two wives that would just mean I now have two women in the house that won't go down on me.
@CollegeWolf I knew we'd keep it close, yikes, we almost won it. This weekend though... oh boy. If the spread is under 18 I'd be very surprised.
Ponder Ponder Ponder, c'mon son. Of course it doesn't help that he has a douche for an OC. Imagine if we had McDaniels in there from day one. We can still go get him. Does Leslie have the balls to make such a move? Is that a good idea? Am I still drunk? I'm really starting to admire Leslie even after all the buses I've envisioned running over him. He seems to be just a genuinely good person. Or maybe I'm just into black guys like a white chick with a big ass. I don't know. He's got to make make some changes soon though. "Perspective, fellas, perspective", bang on Mr. PJD. We still keep our high draft pick. Wow, we're 2-11. That's beyond sucking balls. "Remember, high draft pick", that's all I'll be thinking to myself next week when it's 35-3 after the first half.
@PJD@CollegeWolf That's an interesting point. And the whole masturbating thing is right up my alley. I should have thought of that. However, if you force a Packers fans' hand to do the deed for you would that be allowed? And if Viktor watched would that make it legal? You know the bitch you force down there is gonna be quite chubby 'cause she's a Packer fan, and you might actually be doing her a favor. Public masturbation, it's such a grey area. Too many rules. It might just be best to stay home. Until the rules become more clear.
2 years, 7 months ago on Purple Jesus Diaries' Game 12 Review: Getting Forgiven for our Sins | December
@CollegeWolf CW I love ya. Next year when I go back down to Minny for a game we're gonna light it up! We'll meet up a the PJD Nation tailgating spot. Does such a thing exist? A spot with hot blondes that serve us booze and tell us how great we are? That must exist. And if it doesn't, we'll make it happen. Wow, a spot full of PJD Nation people. Intense. Yikes, even I just shivered.
So, I'm already half horned up here when I sit down down to read this blog and then four sentences in I read "strippers that will do anything". Google that and see what comes up. Needless to say, here I am back, 10 minutes later and I have an extra dirty sock. And then I come across the "reverse trap game". That was brilliant. WE WILL WIN 3 OUT OF THE NEXT 4 GAMES. And I don't like it because, a) we drop in the draft, b) I hate Leslie and I wan't him to get hit by a bus. I've noticed Mr. PJD that you may have, ever so slightly, eased up on Frazier. I know we have dildos for a secondary and most of our offensive coaching decisions are made by a douche, but he is the head coach and I don't think he has the leadership skills at that position. With that said, I will try to ease up on him and do my best to not wish that he will be fired at the end of the year and raped by two asian midgets. Google that. If you get a hard-on after that visual you might need to see a psychiatrist. I just made an appointment. And lastly, Ponder to Percy. WOW. AP in the backfield. Blackmon next year?! Enough said.
A fantastic loss. We looked pretty good, kept our draft pick. Fantastic. Now I don't know what the rest of you guys think of Leslie and this coaching staff but I can't stomach even looking at those fucking wastes of space. That's all I got. Just cannot fucking stand it. Maybe I'm overreacting. Maybe the legal age limit for hot teens should be lowered. I don't know. Now I thought the Vikes in their purple pants looked a bunch of dildo collectors, flip it over to the Cards in their red pants. Pretty damn close.
2 years, 7 months ago on Game Thread: Broncos vs. Vikings | December
Wow PJD, you got some serious connections. It's good to see some opinions from people outside of the PJD nation. That was tight. Really nice. And Viktor, I had him all wrong. He's a bad mother-fucker. That's right. Get out the powder Viktor and line 'em up! Let's at least have one enjoyable moment this season.
2 years, 7 months ago on Celebrity Picks for the Vikings and Broncos Game | December
@Qommie@MikeFromWinnipeg@CollegeWolf I join the conversation about 10 hours too late only to see you boys talking about snaps & snatch. That's beautiful.
2 years, 7 months ago on Warcraft Wednesday: Getting Your Ass Broke | November
@MikeFromWinnipeg Beautiful icon MFW. Nice job!
2 years, 7 months ago on Purple Jesus Diaries' Game 11 Review: Losing for Draft Picks | November
Great analysis Mr. PJD, key players get some experience, look good doing it, yet we still lose the game. Perfecto senor. Damn, you write like a champ. Hung like a mule and blessed with fantastic writing skills. Your wife, does she know how lucky she is? Honestly, Sunday kinda sucks now. I got the Ticket so I'm flippin' back and forth between every game, can't win any money on a few combos to save my life, and I really don't give a fuck about my football team. Even the beers are going down rough. Fuck you Viktor the Viking. But Mondays bring a joy to my face when I can sit down and actually smile when I read about how badly the Vikings suck balls (pop, I just took your cock out of my mouth).
I watched maybe two quarters combined on Sunday just to see how Ponder was doing. Don't have to worry about Percy. Looks like those two are gonna tear mother-fuckers apart next year. Other than that I don't care. I found myself at times just starring at the game absolutely stunned out of my mind. I didn't even get drunk enough to push the boundary on my porn searching last night. Damn. Next football season is 10 months away. Viktor you dick.
What's the consensus on our excuse of a coaching staff down there? Up here we get two Twin Cities channels and of course the internet so I get an idea, but what are the true people saying? Is that fucker and his staff gone at the end of the year or what's going on? Wow, I go a Sunday without getting drunk and tugging a couple out I get pretty fired up. I guess I still have all of this afternoon though.
I'm thankful for a video camera, duct tape and hard liquor mixed with NyQuil. But who isn't? And if you aren't thankful for it, try it, you will be. Of course I'm Canadian so this day means dick all to me but I do have immediate family in Oregon. Dammit, I guess I should call them. Football all day on a holiday. Beautiful. It proves you sons-of-bitches down there can do something right. Enjoy your holiday PJD nation. Wonder if Ponder eats turkey with his shirt off? Hmmmm...
2 years, 8 months ago on Happy Thanksgiving From Purple Jesus and Purple Jesus Diaries | November
@Qommie It's the Frazier - 80's Bears thing that got you is that right Qommie? Well, that was a good team so I can't argue with that. Are you maybe just wanting to push him in front of a train just a little bit yet though?
2 years, 8 months ago on Purple Jesus Diaries' Game Ten Review: Losing the Right Way | November
@CollegeWolf That's an interesting point. We actually need Leslie around to lose. So he is helping the team. Hmmm. Now if we could get him to put McFatty back in I might take back some of the bad things I said about him.
@MikeFromWinnipeg@PJD@Qommie McFatty as a guard. That's good. Might as well have him do something while he's here.
Kudos to you Mr. PJD for writing an entertaining blog on a team that enjoys a set of balls slamming against their chin. And I don't think they even care. Ponder had his rookie game but was still fun to watch. Percy, damn he's good. But pretty much everybody else? Not saying there isn't more talent on the team it's just that it seems to me that half the guys have already checked out until next year. Even redneck Allen had that "I wish I was in the bush wasting a deer" look on his face. And AP? He'll never stop going hardcore but you gotta know he's pissed. Which now leads me to... Frazier.
What's funny is that I really liked him as a coordinator. I always thought we'd lose him when he would interview for a head coaching job. I'm seeing now what others teams saw in him. His inability to lead. He's taking decent players and making them worse, where a good head coach would make decent players better. The team's game plan week to week looks childish (great haiku by the way). And we are so out-coached it really is laughable. It's obvious that he has lost the team. Was Singletary a one year and done coach or was he there for two? I'd check myself right now but since I'm home alone I got about 15 tabs open to all types of porn. Everything from black to white to Asian and of course some PuertoRicanTeens.com. Whew, gonna have do some laundry tonight.
Mr. PJD, brilliant. Fantastic. So directly to the point that my dick has swollen up so much that after I'm writing this it's off to PuertoRicanTeens.com for me. I've got nothing to say, you've said what needs to said. Beautiful. Can I maybe just elaborate on one thing though? My brothers in the PJD nation could you please let me know if you agree with me? Thank you. Here goes... if that fucking (excuse me, first swear in about two months, I've been good, anyway) that fucking, idiot of a head coach and that worthless coaching staff are still here 30 minutes after we lose our last game I'll... probably just drink some more. Somebody get on the phone to the "Fire Childress" sign guy. Seeing about 60,000 "Fire Leslie" signs in the crowd would cause my cock to explode. I'm so horny right now, everybody gets a "like".
2 years, 8 months ago on Purple Jesus Diaries' Game Nine Review: Pack it Up, Season's Over | November
"It's something I could get behind". Funny.
2 years, 8 months ago on 2011 Mid-Season Grades for the Minnesota Vikings | November
I like tits. That's all I got today. Bang on report card Mr. PJD. I like the way you're all over the field when you rant. Maybe a dancing hotties video from you in the next couple of days? It's been awhile.
How many cocks do you think this guy put down before he wrote this? Two, three? You know with a name like "Buddy" this guy sucks cock like a champ. If I pulled out my fat purple cock in front of him the little bastard would pass out due to excitement. I'd wake the douche up though so he could watch me lay into his slut mom. Again.
2 years, 8 months ago on Purple Jesus Diaies' Bye Week Review: Vikings Don't Play, NFL Has Amazing Weekend | November
I'm surprised it's only two. Maybe the rest on this blog haven't come out of the closet yet, or cum in the closet, you know, whatever works. HUGE Vikings following in this part of the country. Also a lot Packers and Bears fans. Yuck. Bunch of cum dumpsters.
I too MFW am from... Winnipeg. My dick throbs just as hard for the Vikes as it does for the Jets. Wow I got issues. Anyway, a couple weeks ago I was gonna give you the gears for being cheap and not getting Sunday Ticket 'cause I read you were missing most of the Vikings games. The Ticket costs $45 a month. I could've given that money to some young hooker every month. Would've been more enjoyable.
@PJD Well, at least answer me this... if you run into your ex's hot younger sister at a party and you promise to drive her home and then when you're driving she all but passes out on your lap, you're not gonna take her home just yet are you? I sure hope not. Oh no, my mind's about to explode. Lindsay Soto just lost her clothes.
Your telling me in Red Dead Redemption I get to shoot Mexicans and cougars?! Cougars as in "been around the block 100 times" older bitches?! YES! Off to the rental store for me. La la lala la la (Smurfs theme). I might be as they say "under the influence" right now. AND WTF MR. PJD! You don't follow hockey?! Did the Vikes move south already? How long was I passed out for? I would figure a man with a huge package such as yourself would love a sport where they stitch up your face right on the bench and then send you out for your next shift. Oh dammit, Lindsay Soto's wearing a black shirt today. Going to have use my imagination.
JUST... as I was maybe starting to accept our quiet, show no emotion head coach, I read that Jim Schwartz listens to Metallica on the way to games?! Oh Mr. Frazier, I'm trying, I really am. When I see other coaches running down the field like they're involved in the play, or getting in the face of a player or an official when something idiotic is done, I think to myself, "Wow, I actually miss Dennis Green". I'll try to stay patient. In the meantime though I think I'll go put on my kids Clone Wars costume, steal some candy, grab a couple shots of Crown Royal and go watch Amelia on wcco. Amelia on one channel, Lindsay Soto of NFL network on another channel, wow, my afternoon is set. I might have some issues but it's too late for me now. Neeeeener-neeeener-neeeener. That was beautiful.
2 years, 8 months ago on Tweets O' the Game: The Nickname Edition | October
Wow, lots of comments today. I think I'm getting a semi-bone. Or it could be the fact that I just finished watching Amelia on wcco. Kluwe. Beautiful.
2 years, 9 months ago on Warcraft Wednesday: Warcraft's Warface | October
Usually on Monday's when I comment to you Mr. PJD I'm as hungover as hell and I'm deleting all the "legal" Puerto Rican porn I looked at the night before. Well, my kid had hockey after the game so I had to stay sober. Sober on a Sunday?! Cock balls dammit. Anyway, Ponder looked good, AP hauled ass and I still think Frazier is the dead guy from "Weekend at Bernie's". PLEASE SOMEBODY, ANYBODY, GET SOME CONFERMATION TO THE WORLD THAT HE IS ALIVE!! Cook and Winfield in there like you said PJD and it could have been celebratory Monday drinks to make up for no drinking yesterday. Whatever. Pretty sure I missed deleting some porn from last week and I got about 34 seconds to spare... gotta go.
2 years, 9 months ago on Purple Jesus Diaries' Game Seven Review: A Kick to the Nuts | October
CW, take heart my friend. My girlfriend (stunned woman) who is a Packers fan (gag) decided for us (yeah I know it's pathetic) that we would not "force" a team on our son who is now 8. Whatever. I enjoy sex. If this was the 1950's though it would be back-hand city. Anyway, for some reason my son decided a couple years back that his team would be the Steelers. I guess I can live with that. But I don't think it was the Steelers colours or their winning ways that won him over. No. I believe that it was the fact that Big Ben dragged some bitch into a bathroom stall and force fed her his cock. My son, gonna grow up to be just like his old man. It's beautiful. Got tears in my eyes.
2 years, 9 months ago on Purple Jesus Diaries' Game Four Review: Spectacularly Bad | October
I think for the rest of the season you should just dedicate this blog to scotch and other forms of alcohol. I personally prefer whiskey as my drink of choice but I do take into account your scotch knowledge. It's very helpful. Of course you've got to keep adding videos of hot women. Those two broads from the other day, wow. I couldn't help myself. I had to fire one off right there. I hit the top right corner of the screen. I was like Stevie Y comimg over the blueline and firing one top right. What's the protocol on telling your buddies about this? I mean that kind of distance, you can't keep that to yourself. Oh, and I noticed many of your readers enjoy pictures of shirtless men. How can you blame them? A young, robust man tossing around a football. Or a stout but lanky kicker who looks like he should be in an afershave commercial. Imagine a night with one of those two just sittting on couch watching Top Gun talking about stuff. This needs to stay in the blog. Wow, just knowing that I can find these three topics in one place puts a smile on my face. Thankyou Mr. PJD. Oh, and one quick question please, is Frazier some kind "show no emotion and never try to spark my football team" cyborg? Or is he a stunned, mute human being? The cameras don't even show him anymore. He literally is the equivalent to watching paint dry. Frazier, McNabb, our secondary, prostitution being illegal, these things have got to go!
What scares me the most now is that some moron in the Vikes organization will say, "Come on guys it's not so bad. Hey I know, let's change it up this Sunday and wear the purple pants!" (Cock gargle gargle) Remember in Slap Shot when Paul Newman was banging an opposing players wife who turned out to be a dyke? Then all the boys started to wonder since she was a dyke does that make her husband a fag? That kind of applies here. If the Vikes run out on the field looking like they enjoy cock does that mean us as fans have to enjoy cock too? Somebody please clarify this for me. I need to know if I'm sticking with beer on Sunday or if it's a gin and coolers day. I sure as hell hope it doesn't come to a purple pants scenario. Old unis the rest of the way. If we're gonna suck balls, let's doing it looking good.
Bears and Packers fans enjoy cock. I'm sure they'd know what to drink with a dildo in their hand. I'll go check out their blogs.
2 years, 10 months ago on Purple Jesus Diaries' Game Three Review: Can a Season Be Over in Week Three? | September
Gonna try to do this without swearing or talking dirty about Korean women, ummmmmm... Lindsay Soto is on NFL Network right now, she kinda has a funny mouth, I wonder if that helps or hinders her cock sucking abilities? Anyway, I like the way you're starting to single out our garbage coaching staff PJD. They are new but, it seems as soon as the other team changes their game plan our coaches seem to just stand around like a group of stunned whores. And Big Leslie? I have come around to admiring his steely glaze but if something doesn't change on the sidelines this weekend... damn, the guy doesn't even talk the whole game! Lindsay Soto is getting sexier by the minute, going to go look for some hot pictures of her.
2 years, 10 months ago on Purple Jesus Diaries' Game Two Review: A Spectacular Loss | September
Bang on PJD, aside from 2 or 3 players this team sucked balls, and the coaching... FUCK ME!! What a fucking display of garbage that was! At least Chilly would have kept 28 in the game to run the clock down. Back to back wildcat plays Musgrave?! Wake the fuck up! And Leslie, he is awake on the sidelines right? Somebody poke that mother-fucker to see if he's alive next Sunday! Now I'm all worked up!! Where are all Puerto Rican bitches at?
2 years, 10 months ago on Purple Jesus Diaries' Game One Review: 39 Yards of Awesomeness | September
"I hope Steve McNair plays well..." damn. I haven't had a guilty laugh like that since last weekend when I found out how old she really was.
2 years, 11 months ago on Conversation @ http://purplejesusdiaries.com/2011-articles/august/purple-jesus-diaries-masturbatory-preseason-game-one-preview-all-tease-no-rooster.html