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@_Toni_


"we positive black men are getting ready to step up and speak out on behalf of black women and change our community. 


Getting ready to? GETTING READY TO? I'm sorry but "positive" black men have had decades to reverse trends. DECADES. And now that we've moved into "too little, too late" territory, we're supposed to look out for these individuals?"


Toni.  Remember that old saying. 

"When you're ready you never have to get ready."


This guy is competing with the guy who is already "ready". As in ready to commit and put a ring on it.    As in ready to step up and take care of the children he makes. As in making sure his family is in a save and secure environment.


Black women want the same thing that every woman on the planet wants. It took a while but she is reaching out for it and going for it. So guy.  Keep getting "ready".  We're out.


1 hour, 17 minutes ago on Could What Ralph Richard Banks Said in His Book Be True Regarding How Swirling Might Help Black Women Marry Black Men?

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@SavageTango @Brenda55

Bombay Sapphire....and tonic over ice.

SirLion is Oban....neat.

Just in case we all meet up some day which is quite possible since we will be in your neck of the woods visiting family in July.

5 hours, 12 minutes ago on Ladies, Know Your Bourbon!

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@SavageTango @Brenda55

SirLoin is a Scotch drinker.

Oban is his poison of choice.


As far as I am concerned the stuff taste like burnt oak trees.  Of course they do burn the insides of the barrels to get that amber color and flavor so I am not far off in that assessment.

5 hours, 18 minutes ago on Ladies, Know Your Bourbon!

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Sigh if I have to listen to yet another "Don't give up on us speech."


Just stop it.  Please. This is just as demeaning as that " Why do Black Men hate us." meme.


Why focus on women who don't want you?


We're done. Seriously.  We're done.


Guy.  This is not about you.  This is about us.  It is about who we want.  It is about who wants us and have stepped up to demonstrate that.


I am going to post a cute blurb found on the site  :http://whiteboysdatingblackgirls.tumblr.com/


It is about David Bowie and Iman.


Iman attended some of David’s concerts in the late 1980’s, but they were not properly introduced until October 1990 at a dinner held by their mutual hairdresser, Teddy Antolin,  Bowie fell in love instantly.  He was later quoted in an interview saying “I was naming the children the night we met … it was absolutely immediate.” But not so for Iman. “I did not want to get involved with a rock star. No way. It is not a sane thing to do, but David changed my mind. He wooed me.”Not long after their first meeting, Iman had to travel to Paris.  She arrived to a hotel room filled with her favorite flower (gardenias) and a card from David.  When she returned to Los Angeles, David was there waiting for her at the airport. Iman was sold. In an interview with NyMag Iman recalled, “His actions spoke louder [than words]. […] the doors open to the plane, and I come out and I see all these people taking a picture of somebody. And he was standing there, flowers in hand, no security. That was when I knew. He didn’t care if anyone saw.”

Sure they are celebs but do you realize just how many times this is happening to us average black women?  What women would  pass up on a pursuit like that? For what? For a "Don't give up on us?"
Why should we? 
I know you see the BW/ non-Bm engagement photos and videos, you see the boyfriend  and husband tag, you see the wedding films and the first born being publicly celebrated. You see this on line and you are seeing this offline. They are increasing in number and you see that too. You see communities like this one growing and you wonder what does all this mean for me. That in my opinion is the wrong question to ask and the wrong focus. 


 This is not about you and the more progressive of us know that and have moved on.
This is about a demographic shift that is happening among all races in the U.S. and Europe.It is bigger than you and your concerns.  It is much bigger than a "Don't give up on us."  AA Black women are increasingly part of the 15 percent (and growing) of Americans who date, marry and form families interracialy.  Black women are doing this because we can. Because those options are out there and we need no one's permission to live as we want to.  Sites like this one are recording, reflecting and supporting the fact that Black women are much more easily finding like minded non-black men who want them and who want them for life. BB&W is recording, reflecting and supporting the fact that Black women are charting their own course and are finding the life and love among a variety of eligible men and circumstances.  These are truly exciting times for the black woman who want to live life on her own terms and not life as it has been dictated to her.
So the best thing for you is to take the advice we often give to black women who visit this space.  Stop focusing on the people who are no longer checking for you and focus on the ones who are.Your black queen is out there waiting for you and she is very vocal about that fact. So show her the respect she deserves by shifting your attention in her direction. Pursue her ardently and stop wasting your time with us because as far as the women here are concerned you are not the one.

5 hours, 40 minutes ago on Could What Ralph Richard Banks Said in His Book Be True Regarding How Swirling Might Help Black Women Marry Black Men?

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@EmpressNK

OK I am seeing the same thing.  I thought it was all in my head. I do not beleive I have celiac (although my mom has it.) But I see a distinct change if I eat wheat products.


I am going to start a trial today and see what happens. 


1 day, 5 hours ago on Grain-Free, Fall Recipes by the Author of “Wheat Belly!”

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@SirLoinDeBeef @SavageTango @Cami2210

He is not talking about me......evil side-eye at SirLoin for not making that clear. 

1 day, 13 hours ago on AAWG: SavageTango tells it. Why I Swirl.

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I’m disgusted at how this woman cried wolf, but charging her with a crime seems a bit excessive."


I dunno. My guess the cops are sick of her s**t too. 

1 day, 13 hours ago on Daniele Watts Faced with Lewd Conduct Charges

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@Selmix @trinigirl1

I would like to welcome you to the site and let you know so that you can let your friends know that there will definitely  be a space on BB&W new forum for black women who hale from and are living outside of the USA. 

1 day, 20 hours ago on Listen Ladies! If You’re Going to Complain About How “Black Men Hate You” While Scoffing at Expanding Your Options…Then You’re Just Begging.

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@trinigirl1 @Selmix

Lest we forget that black women are often strangers in a strange land......and we also have to deal with our fellow skin-folks.........get the kids off to school, the house picked up, the shopping done, dog to the vet and dinner on the table on time.

1 day, 20 hours ago on Listen Ladies! If You’re Going to Complain About How “Black Men Hate You” While Scoffing at Expanding Your Options…Then You’re Just Begging.

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Chris I know that you did not want to cover this. It's like this scene below in the Godfather:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UPw-3e_pzqU



The Huff Post article came across to me like the rest of the folks now tuning into a program that we watched years ago. They are just now catching it on reruns.  Think about it.  This site had been around how long?  Black women empowerment bloggers began posting their thoughts since when?


Gonna be honest on this one.  Elegance's one month (or longer) experiment idea is looking awfully good to me at this point.  You know what?  I really think it would be a sucess too. I realize that black women are all along the spectrum when it comes to working out the toxic experiences that they have had with far too many black men and to much of the BC.  That said most of us here have crossed those rough seas, landed on much more welcoming shores, crossed the beach and are heading inland.  We are being greeted by the men and women who have preceded us and are now participating in building the campsite. We are building a stronger community for the other voyagers who will arrive wanting a fuller life on her own terms. 


So while the incandescent bulbs are finally clicking on for many black women we will shine our Acandescent™ ones and keep it moving forward. 


http://finallybulbs.com/



1 day, 22 hours ago on Listen Ladies! If You’re Going to Complain About How “Black Men Hate You” While Scoffing at Expanding Your Options…Then You’re Just Begging.

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@Andrew Mulligan @Brenda55

Thank-you.  I will email you off line to discuss this further.  Thank-you for the offer. 

2 days, 22 hours ago on Open Thread: Brainstorm Session -The Forum

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Just posting an intresting article.

Some women really, really love Scotch.


http://www.forbes.com/sites/larryolmsted/2012/10/10/dewars-a-womans-scotch-whisky/

3 days, 4 hours ago on Ladies, Know Your Bourbon!

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@RhondaSpeights @Brenda55 @Neil Marsden


If you do head wraps you may want to look into Pashmina scarves.  I use the cheapo ones since I have hair and they keep me plenty warm.  You may want to spend a little more and get the real wool ones.  They are still light weight but will keep your head toasty.

3 days, 16 hours ago on AAWG: SavageTango tells it. Why I Swirl.

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@RhondaSpeights @Brenda55 @Neil Marsden

That's right.  I had them too.  A black pair and then white ones for Easter Sunday.

3 days, 16 hours ago on AAWG: SavageTango tells it. Why I Swirl.

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@RhondaSpeights @Brenda55 @Neil Marsden

You will not regret it.  I have been wearing them now that my hair has thinned and I sport a TWA.

3 days, 16 hours ago on AAWG: SavageTango tells it. Why I Swirl.

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@RhondaSpeights @Brenda55 @Neil Marsden

Yep.  Keeps the ashys away.  LOL


I remember mom greasing up our legs before putting on those white anklets socks when I was a kid. 

3 days, 16 hours ago on AAWG: SavageTango tells it. Why I Swirl.

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@RhondaSpeights @Brenda55 @Neil Marsden

Fur, be it real of faux, is your friend.

3 days, 16 hours ago on AAWG: SavageTango tells it. Why I Swirl.

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@RhondaSpeights @Brenda55 @Neil Marsden

A trick I learned years ago. Coat yourself with a thin layer of Vaseline before you get dressed to go out. I used to do that when waiting for those early morning buses.  Works great.

3 days, 16 hours ago on AAWG: SavageTango tells it. Why I Swirl.

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@RhondaSpeights @Neil Marsden @Brenda55

"Word on the street is that we are in for another brutal winter this year....Uggggg"


Oh hell no. Girl I hope that is not true. 

3 days, 16 hours ago on AAWG: SavageTango tells it. Why I Swirl.

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@Neil Marsden @Brenda55 @RhondaSpeights

Before I got my drivers licence I remember standing on many a street corner at the crack of dawn waiting for the bus in order to work the 7-3 shift.

Wind so cold it would cut through you. In Philly icy cold wind is called the hawk. We say the hawk is flying high today to warn folks before going out to brace themselves. 

3 days, 16 hours ago on AAWG: SavageTango tells it. Why I Swirl.

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@Neil Marsden @RhondaSpeights

Winter in Michigan is no joke.  Not for the faint of heart.  I am originally from Buffalo NY so I know what I'm talking about.

3 days, 17 hours ago on AAWG: SavageTango tells it. Why I Swirl.

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@Cami2210 @Brenda55


Fair enough. It is obviously that you have had a string of bad luck when it comes to meeting and dating white men. It is like the ones that you have met confirm the belief that white men are only interested in one thing and are not at all serious about forming a committed relationship with a black women. 


Fortunately many women on this site have had a very different experience which may be why some of us really did not sweat Savage's post and saw it as a hoot. 


Men and women come to this site with a wide variation of romantic experiences and no article is one size fits all. If we wanted to be daring I guess we could do a series of articles about casual sexual encounters between black women and white men.  I know that they do occur, are consensual and gratifying to both parties. 


BW/WM relationships run the gambit so I for one will not take something like that off the table now that the idea is out there. It may be of interest to some to explore this aspect of the BW/WM dynamic.   Who knows.



3 days, 17 hours ago on AAWG: SavageTango tells it. Why I Swirl.

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@onmywayup

You are making perfect sense. Great post.

3 days, 19 hours ago on Open Thread: Brainstorm Session -The Forum

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@Cami2210

"Is this going to be the first of many articles by white men who like to have casual, uncommitted sex with only black women after they marry a white woman? "


Quite honestly it never occurred to us to run a series of articles like the one you have suggested so I can safely say no, this is not.  What this is is one man's opinion expressed in the most entertaining way.


Oh BTW why the assumption that Savage, or any other divorced white guy is sexing every black women he takes out or wants to sex every black women he takes out?

Why did you jump there? 

3 days, 20 hours ago on AAWG: SavageTango tells it. Why I Swirl.

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@PoetOfDarkness


"how about a section featuring bw/wm erotica? (i know, i know lol)"


Don't feel bad.  We are already doing that. Check out some of the selections that we have posted over the past few weeks.


What is nice is that the authors themselves are writing content just  for us here at BB&W and several have posted on the site to engage this community directly.


They are doing their part so lets do ours and make them welcome by checking out what they have to offer, comment and possibly make a purchase.

3 days, 23 hours ago on Open Thread: Brainstorm Session -The Forum

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MODERATOR'S NOTE:

We are getting some newbies and long time readers coming out of lurk mode.


Welcome all.


We were just asked how to change your avatar so I am re-posting the response here.


Click on your screen name.  That will open a drop-down menu.

Click on edit profile.

Under account Info you will see an instruction to clear your current Avatar.

If you do not have one click on Choose File and down load one from your computer or from a URL.



3 days, 23 hours ago on Open Thread: Brainstorm Session -The Forum

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@Silverroxen

Click on your screen name.  That will open a drop-down menu.

Click on edit profile.

Under account Info you will see an instruction to clear your current Avatar.

If you do not have one click on Choose File and down load one from your computer or from a URL.

3 days, 23 hours ago on BB&W Rules and Terms

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@Andrew Mulligan

Well this may be jumping the gun but as we grow BB&W will be needing moderators and the participation of those who have had experience with the behind the sense of forums.

More on that later.

4 days ago on Open Thread: Brainstorm Session -The Forum

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@seemebeautiful


All will be reveled in time.  Not the most satisfying answer but all we have at this point. The platform is up and functional.  Now we need to "populate" it with sections and  subject matter hence this post.


Tell us what you want while we are in this building stage. 

4 days ago on Open Thread: Brainstorm Session -The Forum

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@ibetnoonehasthisusername

"But my brains & loyalty are not what get thing up in the bedroom. My curves, my smooth chocolate skin etc. get his engines revved. I have a friend (white) who only dates blondes. If my man prefers darks skin, that's not racist. He didn't do it to "see what it's like". He put a ring on it. A pretty nice one too."


Sounds like my man.


BTW welcome to the party.  Lurking is cool but joining in is much more fun.

4 days ago on AAWG: SavageTango tells it. Why I Swirl.

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@DanielBarnes

Don't worry about it.  He's taken and I doubt he was checking for you in the first place.

4 days, 5 hours ago on John and Jenese–You Will NOT Want to Skip This!

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@DeeNCee76


Excellent suggestion and no we will not forget that much of our community are from all over the world.

That means travel

Raising kids overseas

Being an Expat

Being an immigrant

Being in a relationship and marriage to a person form another country.

IRR in other lands...reaction to and acceptance of.


How am I doing so far?  Anything to add?


4 days, 5 hours ago on Open Thread: Brainstorm Session -The Forum

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@dani-BBW


Good to know this.  I will reach out offline re. your experience with online forums.

5 days, 3 hours ago on We Broke $5,000 in just THREE Days! Get Your “Troll Tears” Sippy Cup Today!

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@thecrazyartist


We plan to leave this open indefinitely in order to give everyone who desires a chance to contribute.


Thank you in advance for your generosity and support. It is people like you that make BB&W  what it is and it is together that we will continue to bring all of you the kind of community you want.  The response from all of you has been fantastic to witness. I have to admit that I am awestruck. You guys are the best.

5 days, 10 hours ago on We Broke $5,000 in just THREE Days! Get Your “Troll Tears” Sippy Cup Today!

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@Joyce345 @jazzyfae45 @Lady A

That did not work out too well now didn't it.

5 days, 16 hours ago on Beyond Black & White Fan Page is Under Attack Again. Time to Go to War.

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@Marielisa_

Hummmmmmm.  You all excited about the new forum huh?

Maybe its time for a new open thread so you can tell us what you want to see.

6 days, 6 hours ago on Challenge! Can You Be the BEST Version of You?

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@Statuesque

After reading this entire post and especially this right here:

"The greatest visionaries always create their own spaces and platforms.  Freedom isn't free, especially when you have to be subjected to the whims of breathtakingly stupid vermin who can swarm and destroy your online presence and content simply by complaining about nothing."


How could I not feature this.


6 days, 15 hours ago on Beyond Black & White Fan Page is Under Attack Again. Time to Go to War.

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@tonyrog

Pissing off the guys who love and support said woman is not smart either.

6 days, 21 hours ago on Video: Update on the BB&W Fund Raising Push!

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:::: FUND RAISING UPDATE::::


$4,338 as of 8:21 EST.


BB&W is here to stay and you are all making this happen.


Thank-You.




1 week ago on Video: Update on the BB&W Fund Raising Push!

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@caligirl94117 @Brenda55 @Christelyn

Actually the legal defense fund I am referring to is for the protection of BB&W.

1 week ago on Beyond Black & White Fan Page is Under Attack Again. Time to Go to War.

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@oceanspray Actually the site owner took it down herself.

1 week ago on Beyond Black & White Fan Page is Under Attack Again. Time to Go to War.

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@Laura_j

^^^^^^^^This is what it's all about. We cannot let fine young people like this down.

Thank-you for this comment.

1 week ago on Beyond Black & White Fan Page is Under Attack Again. Time to Go to War.

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@Christelyn

Yes.  I also like your idea for a legal defense fund. Nothing like putting some teeth into the mix.

1 week ago on Beyond Black & White Fan Page is Under Attack Again. Time to Go to War.

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For those of you who question why Chris is going this route please read this.


Top 10 Reasons Why Corporate Social Media is Not Your Friend, and Dark Social Media Is


"If someone hostile to your politics, your business or your person lodges a spurious complaint to Facebook, or Yahoo, Google or YouTube, say, that you're an anti-Semetic copyright-violating whistle blowing vegan child molester, what these providers generally do is simply cut your account off without notice. Their terms of service often relieve them of the bother of even sharing the exact nature of the complaint against you let alone investigating it, and explicitly state that “your” lists are really theirs. I know people who've lost thousands of business contacts and years of content in Yahoo and Google email accounts, lists and YouTube contents this way"

http://tinyurl.com/msuag5b

1 week ago on Beyond Black & White Fan Page is Under Attack Again. Time to Go to War.

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