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@Uncultured Baby Are you kidding me?  He couldn't be more ready to be a Dodger.

5 days, 20 hours ago on Pirates 6, Dodgers 1: Brutal Road Trip Is Brutal

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@Johnnyswing I went to college there.  It's one of those cities where all of the smart young people leave to go somewhere better.

1 week, 1 day ago on Dodgers @ Cardinals July 20, 2014: Joc Pederson And The 25 Man Roster

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@Bill Grabarkewitz He makes Charles Barkley look smart.

1 week, 1 day ago on Dodgers @ Cardinals July 20, 2014: Joc Pederson And The 25 Man Roster

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This is now officially a rivalry.

1 week, 1 day ago on Dodgers @ Cardinals July 20, 2014: Joc Pederson And The 25 Man Roster

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Poor Hanley can't catch a break.

1 week, 1 day ago on Dodgers @ Cardinals July 20, 2014: Joc Pederson And The 25 Man Roster

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Dre upping his trade value.

1 week, 1 day ago on Dodgers @ Cardinals July 20, 2014: Joc Pederson And The 25 Man Roster

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@MalkinCookies You mean a lot of strikeouts with RISP and maybe a few errors thrown in for good measure?

1 week, 1 day ago on Dodgers @ Cardinals July 20, 2014: Joc Pederson And The 25 Man Roster

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@PagansOedipalComplex I'd settle for some guys who could hit and stay healthy.

1 week, 2 days ago on Cardinals 4, Dodgers 2: Greinke Struggles, Puig Hurt, Another Frustrating Loss

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@Jman449 No, just that they aren't that good.

1 week, 2 days ago on Cardinals 4, Dodgers 2: Greinke Struggles, Puig Hurt, Another Frustrating Loss

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JFC.  Great start to the 2nd "half".

1 week, 3 days ago on Dodgers @ Cardinals July 19, 2014: The Magic Of The Outfield Rotation

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I am really starting to hate the Cardinals.  Last year, they plunked Hanley.  This year, Matheny starts Wainwright instead of Kershaw and Wainwright allows 3 runs, including a grooved double to Jeter that turned into a run.  If the Dodgers make the WS, that will be 2 years in a row that Matheny has done something to screw with the Dodgers (I believe he ordered the Code Red on Hanley and you will never convince me otherwise).

1 week, 6 days ago on Dodgers at the All-Star Game: Puig Struggles, Pitchers Shine, Gordon Struts

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I'm in law enforcement and some coworkers went to a narcotics seminar where they discussed the continued popularity of the Purple Drank.

2 weeks, 1 day ago on 2014 Midseason Los Angeles Dodgers’ Top 25 prospects

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@Lobo @mickeyhatcher We, sir, will have to agree to disagree on this one.  What I saw was the ball scooting under his glove.

2 weeks, 3 days ago on Padres @ Dodgers July 11, 2014: As The Outfield Turns

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Butera should have caught that.  He didn't keep his glove down.  Bad scoring.

2 weeks, 3 days ago on Padres @ Dodgers July 11, 2014: As The Outfield Turns

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@Omer (beercoozie) I have a signed picture from the San Diego Chicken with that exact quote.  It is proudly displayed in my living room.

2 weeks, 4 days ago on Padres @ Dodgers July 10, 2014: The Odds of a Clayton Kershaw No-Hitter

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@steelmohawk Cable TV: The Wire. Network TV: NYPD Blue.

2 weeks, 4 days ago on Arranging the Dodger Outfield Mathematically

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If it meant repaying all of the paying customers out of their own pockets, do you think the Dodgers would just forfeit the game?


2 weeks, 6 days ago on Dodgers @ Tigers July 8, 2014: Hyun-jin Ryu And A Former Mismatch

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The Dodgers know that healthy players get hurt in Coors Field.  But what happens when you start an injured player in Coors Field?  He gets healthy!  Hanley is going to be magically cured by the Coors Field jinx.

3 weeks, 4 days ago on Hanley Ramirez Is Back, For Some Reason

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Kershaw should not be allowed to step foot in Coors Field, let alone pitch there.  It is the center of all things terrible for the Dodgers.  Give him a little extra rest and wait until the next series.

3 weeks, 5 days ago on Cleveland 5, Dodgers 4: How Frustrating

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Greinke will probably give him shit about his hitting.

1 month, 1 week ago on Dodgers 8, Rockies 0: Clayton Kershaw Just Pitched The Best Game You Will Ever See

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I get the mlb baseball package so I can see Clayton pitch every 5th game.  This is why.  I am so grateful to be able to root for somebody like him in Dodger blue.

1 month, 1 week ago on Dodgers 8, Rockies 0: Clayton Kershaw Just Pitched The Best Game You Will Ever See

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Why isn't somebody keeping Clayton company on the bench?

1 month, 1 week ago on Rockies @ Dodgers June 18, 2014: Hanley Talks His Way Into The Lineup

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That was such a Hanley error.

1 month, 1 week ago on Rockies @ Dodgers June 18, 2014: Hanley Talks His Way Into The Lineup

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Dodgers' offensive constipation relieved.  Laxative party worked.  

1 month, 4 weeks ago on Pirates @ Dodgers May 31, 2014: Ryu Tries To Start Split

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I blame all of this on Australia.  And bad defense.  And a worse bullpen.  And injuries.  

1 month, 4 weeks ago on Pirates 2, Dodgers 1: That Was Awful

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Can somebody help me out with lipreading Beckett?  The best I can do is, "There is nothing outside the bat hole."  Not sure if this is some weird Alyssa Milano reference or what.

2 months, 1 week ago on Dodgers 9, Mets 4: RIP Dodger Infield

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@PagansOedipalComplex @mickeyhatcher  I see your point, but I am so tired of wasting good outings by our starting pitchers, I guess I don't agree.  Obviously, a big part of this debate turns on whether Pederson can produce at the MLB level.  I'd really like to see what he can do before we give him up.

2 months, 1 week ago on Dodger Outfield Is A Problem Only If You Hate Great Production

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@a potato @mickeyhatcher  @great at maff  Ethier and Crawford are done, and if not for awful contracts, they would be traded.  Van Slyke seems like he can produce.

2 months, 1 week ago on Dodger Outfield Is A Problem Only If You Hate Great Production

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@great at maff @mickeyhatcher  You have to be balanced to win.  The Dodgers always have very good starting pitching and cannot score enough runs.  The top of our rotation, if healthy, is good enough for the playoffs.  The Dodgers should not be trading a possible long-term contributor at the plate for more starting pitching.  But we can agree to disagree on this.

2 months, 1 week ago on Dodger Outfield Is A Problem Only If You Hate Great Production

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@great at maff @mickeyhatcher  Not really fair.  He is only starting because of injuries.  I wouldn't judge our rotation by our 6th starter.


2 months, 1 week ago on Dodger Outfield Is A Problem Only If You Hate Great Production

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JUST SAY NO TO DAVID PRICE.  I am definitely one of the people who gets upset at the thought of Pederson getting traded for any pitcher, even David Price.  Starting pitching is our strength.  Why would we trade a possible contributor down the road to improve something that is already a strength?  I have followed the Dodgers for 27 years, and you know what they ALWAYS struggle with?  Scoring enough runs.  I will be very disheartened if Pederson gets traded for a starting pitcher. 

2 months, 1 week ago on Dodger Outfield Is A Problem Only If You Hate Great Production

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I like being able to hear what they are saying on the field.

2 months, 3 weeks ago on Dodgers @ Marlins May 3, 2014: Maholm’s Reprieve

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As Andre moves to 5th on the OF depth chart . . . 

2 months, 3 weeks ago on Dodgers @ Marlins May 3, 2014: Maholm’s Reprieve

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I'd feel comfortable with 5 runs.  No less.

2 months, 3 weeks ago on Dodgers @ Marlins May 3, 2014: Maholm’s Reprieve

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@TellMyWifeISaidHello @P_F_P  I was at that game!  Unbelievable.

2 months, 3 weeks ago on Dodgers @ Marlins May 3, 2014: Maholm’s Reprieve

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@ABSmileBunch @mickeyhatcher  I don't know, but it sounds really cool.

2 months, 3 weeks ago on Dodgers @ Marlins May 3, 2014: Maholm’s Reprieve

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@ABSmileBunch  In order to feel fear, you have to still have hope.

2 months, 3 weeks ago on Dodgers @ Marlins May 3, 2014: Maholm’s Reprieve

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Great.  Now we get to tax the bullpen even more.  Under no circumstance should Jansen be allowed to pitch.  

2 months, 3 weeks ago on Dodgers @ Marlins May 3, 2014: Maholm’s Reprieve

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Webster's "Dumpster Fire" -- When a pile of smelly refuse burns uncontrollably, putting off a terrible smell and putting everybody around at risk.  Also see, Los Angeles Dodgers bullpen.

2 months, 3 weeks ago on Dodgers @ Marlins May 3, 2014: Maholm’s Reprieve

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Honeycutt: You suck lately.

Withrow: I know.

Honeycutt: OK.  Try not to fuck it up.  (Slap on the ass)

2 months, 3 weeks ago on Dodgers @ Marlins May 3, 2014: Maholm’s Reprieve

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@a tomato  No.  Next question.


2 months, 3 weeks ago on Dodgers @ Marlins May 3, 2014: Maholm’s Reprieve

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What makes you more sick to your stomach right now?  Withrow coming into the game or Hanley grabbing his hand in pain?

3 months ago on April 26, 2014 Rockies @ Dodgers: In Appreciation Of Juan Uribe

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@I Digesti  Because he was a bad defensive catcher.


3 months ago on April 26, 2014 Rockies @ Dodgers: In Appreciation Of Juan Uribe

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Why is everybody calling for double penetration?


3 months ago on April 26, 2014 Rockies @ Dodgers: In Appreciation Of Juan Uribe

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Throwing a wild pitch during an intentional walk that allows a run will do that.


3 months ago on April 26, 2014 Rockies @ Dodgers: In Appreciation Of Juan Uribe

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