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@666foldamort @capnsparrow I believe he just did

1 day, 15 hours ago on Justin Turner Won’t Be As Lucky In 2015

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I go away for 30 minutes....

1 day, 15 hours ago on Justin Turner Won’t Be As Lucky In 2015

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@Weston T @Subtle Euphemism I'm on salary, so I flagrantly go when I feel like it

1 day, 17 hours ago on Justin Turner Won’t Be As Lucky In 2015

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@Weston T @Subtle Euphemism I don't think @Weston T  is taking this question seriously

1 day, 17 hours ago on Justin Turner Won’t Be As Lucky In 2015

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@Weston T It always comes around to butts here

1 day, 17 hours ago on Justin Turner Won’t Be As Lucky In 2015

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Trying to decide whether I should go see that sniper movie after work or not? I usually don't go to movies to get bummed out. Thoughts?

1 day, 17 hours ago on Justin Turner Won’t Be As Lucky In 2015

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@Purple Drank @Subtle Euphemism I'M AT WORK, DRANK!!!

1 day, 17 hours ago on Justin Turner Won’t Be As Lucky In 2015

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Are we still talking about butts around here?

1 day, 17 hours ago on Justin Turner Won’t Be As Lucky In 2015

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@Moderately Excited Towel @DBrim "Super Rich" is that a place or an explanation for the entire town?

1 day, 17 hours ago on Justin Turner Won’t Be As Lucky In 2015

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@Iron Man Returns Wearing your own jersey is hilarious and awesome at the same time

1 day, 17 hours ago on Justin Turner Won’t Be As Lucky In 2015

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@deblue Sorry man

1 day, 18 hours ago on Justin Turner Won’t Be As Lucky In 2015

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One of my bosses just walked in the office, closed his office door, and let out a long string of obscenity. Hmm...should I wish him a happy friday?

1 day, 21 hours ago on Justin Turner Won’t Be As Lucky In 2015

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@peetato goat rule in effect, but DeMarcus Cousins is a bad dude. And not in a good way. 

1 day, 21 hours ago on Justin Turner Won’t Be As Lucky In 2015

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@peetato make sure you answer all emails and phone calls promptly so they know you aren't taking a nap. ,,that is about it, really

1 day, 22 hours ago on Justin Turner Won’t Be As Lucky In 2015

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@DBrim It boggles. French toast is meant to have a velvety, custardy consistency. Bagels are meant to be chewy and crusty with a sock-you-in-the-mouth attitude.  1+2=7?

1 day, 22 hours ago on Justin Turner Won’t Be As Lucky In 2015

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@DBrim That sounds awful

1 day, 22 hours ago on Justin Turner Won’t Be As Lucky In 2015

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@Dustin Nosler You should check at Spring training if he has said clover tattooed as a tramp stamp.


Which begs the question of all of us: "If getting a 4-leaf clover tramp stamp tattoo would guarantee a .400 BABIP, would you get it?"

1 day, 22 hours ago on Justin Turner Won’t Be As Lucky In 2015

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I wouldn't say that. Justin looks like he has a bit of the luck of the Irish about him.

1 day, 22 hours ago on Justin Turner Won’t Be As Lucky In 2015

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@Weston T @Subtle Euphemism Oh. So Pretty in Pink then.

2 days, 16 hours ago on 2015 Dodgers Top 100 prospects: 30-21

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@Weston T Were you in the movie, The Breakfast Club?

2 days, 16 hours ago on 2015 Dodgers Top 100 prospects: 30-21

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@Batted Bob @Subtle Euphemism @deblue You didn't go to my high school, did you?

2 days, 16 hours ago on 2015 Dodgers Top 100 prospects: 30-21

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@Batted Bob @Subtle Euphemism @deblue He used to ask out the most desirable girl from the stuck up clique in HS regularly. She would say yes, tell her friends during break, and they would convince her to break the date. We all thought it was great fun. Sometimes when athletes in the major sports would get a little full of themselves, he would put all his medals from CIF, Masters, and state on his lettermens jacket and wear it to school. He looked like a North Korean general on those days.


Man, I love that guy. He was trolling before it was even a thing.

2 days, 16 hours ago on 2015 Dodgers Top 100 prospects: 30-21

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@Batted Bob @Subtle Euphemism @deblue I had a friend like that, but in cross country. Ended up at UCLA. 

2 days, 16 hours ago on 2015 Dodgers Top 100 prospects: 30-21

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@deblue @Subtle Euphemism Or, tuition for some school like...Stanford

2 days, 16 hours ago on 2015 Dodgers Top 100 prospects: 30-21

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@deblue Plot twist: baseball schollies usually aren't even full schollies. He paid money to lose $2M.

2 days, 16 hours ago on 2015 Dodgers Top 100 prospects: 30-21

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@Chigbogu Fan #1 pee pal professional The The flowchart is a wondrous thing

2 days, 18 hours ago on 2015 Dodgers Top 100 prospects: 30-21

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@PagansOedipalComplex @Subtle Euphemism They are all great. Charlie Brown is apparently british and Morrissey's uncle or something

2 days, 18 hours ago on 2015 Dodgers Top 100 prospects: 30-21

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Charlie Brown and Morrissey:

2 days, 18 hours ago on 2015 Dodgers Top 100 prospects: 30-21

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@Purple Drank @Subtle Euphemism I did have access to a rotten banana that I hid at the bottom of a guy's locker at age 12. He didn't notice and got yelled at by a teacher during locker check.

2 days, 18 hours ago on 2015 Dodgers Top 100 prospects: 30-21

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@Purple Drank @Subtle Euphemism I did not have access to paramilitary hardward at age 12, Drank. I don't blame you for not knowing this, because you are not a person

2 days, 18 hours ago on 2015 Dodgers Top 100 prospects: 30-21

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Another math story. In junior high, my friend was messing with a stink bomb vial during algebra when it broke. I still remember the terrified look he gave me when it happened.


Anyway, he managed to wrap it up in a handful of notebook paper and throw it away at the back of the room without anyone noticing. Eventually, the back of the room started complaining, so our teacher took the trash can to the administration office and left it in there...where it promptly stunk up the entire administration office. 


My friend was not caught.


Rate me story.

2 days, 18 hours ago on 2015 Dodgers Top 100 prospects: 30-21

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Hey, does anyone know what McCourt is up to these days? Is his V-energy topped up?

2 days, 18 hours ago on 2015 Dodgers Top 100 prospects: 30-21

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@Tymathee @Subtle Euphemism He is legit as a fielder. Being ENTITLED because of your defense, though, slays me.

2 days, 18 hours ago on 2015 Dodgers Top 100 prospects: 30-21

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@Tymathee @Subtle Euphemism 'Don't talk to me! I'm the guy who bats 8th and makes all the routine plays!"

2 days, 18 hours ago on 2015 Dodgers Top 100 prospects: 30-21

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@Batted Bob @Tymathee He is also funky and cold.

2 days, 18 hours ago on 2015 Dodgers Top 100 prospects: 30-21

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If you are an "all glove, no hit" shortstop,isn't it like a requirement that you have a plucky, team-first attitude? How does a no hit middle infielder become sullen and ungracious? It boggles the mind.

2 days, 18 hours ago on 2015 Dodgers Top 100 prospects: 30-21

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@Dave! (Or Justin Turner, Maybe) @deblue This brings back lots of memories of my days working in Dodger parking.

2 days, 20 hours ago on Four Dodgers Make Keith Law’s Top 100 List

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@Dustin Nosler WILL THEY SHAVE HIS HEAD!! I NEED TO KNOW!

2 days, 21 hours ago on Four Dodgers Make Keith Law’s Top 100 List

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@capnsparrow We used that color for my daughters room, too. I learned that a little goes a long way 

2 days, 21 hours ago on Four Dodgers Make Keith Law’s Top 100 List

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@ABSmileBunch @isanz33 And, we have the drinking game for every time he hits a dribbler to the first baseman!

2 days, 22 hours ago on Four Dodgers Make Keith Law’s Top 100 List

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@Disgruntled Goat we ARE talking about HR here, you know.

3 days, 15 hours ago on 2014 Dodgers In Review: Professional Pitcher Paul Maholm

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