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On an unrelated note... All the signs are there: the abnormal amount of posts for this time of year; the playful, dare I say, positive lilt of the content; the "I don't want to jinx it" tacit approval of the new coaching hires.... do we need to stage an intervention ... because it seems like hope might be rearing it's slightly out of focus head. What will happen if the coaching staff starts seeing what we did during their player evaluations and begins making decisive, intelligent, feelings be damned changes to the roster.. what then? Will we all fall down the rabbit hole? What if they become a dominant franchise ... I know I'm scared too - it's OKAY
8 months, 2 weeks ago on So, Fred Evans Sister is an Olympic Bobsledder
Finally , a coach who isn't Mr. Nice Guy ( not counting Burnsie of course)!
9 months, 1 week ago on How Exactly Is This Mike Zimmer Interview Going With the Vikings?
what a beautiful disaster - someone should tell our defense that games are 60 minutes long - not 55. A real d - coordinator would be all over that and, due to the pathetic state of the NFC north, we would actually be competing for the division title
10 months, 2 weeks ago on PJD's Game 13 Recap: What the Hell Was That?
Succinctiy put as usual - youv'e summed up my thoughts precisely yet again.... and the beat goes on
10 months, 3 weeks ago on PJD's Game 12 Recap: A Microcosm of Ineptitude
Just remember, FAN is short for FANATIC.... so logical forethought and reasoning such as yours just doesn't compute for the vast majority...sigh.
11 months, 2 weeks ago on Vikings Tanking Analysis: Is One Game Really Worth It?
You're tongue is a paintbrush on the internet canvas today. Thank you for the gift of levity while we deal with the horror of what will surely become the fated season that trumps the grand Les Steckel era. It truly is a beautiful disaster that is impossible to look away from - just keep the camera rolling, this is a goldmine.
1 year ago on So How Good Was Josh Freeman?!
We may have to change uniforms, team colors, fight song, mascot, logo and team name to put this season behind us - oh and spray the lid and bowl down with cooking oil and flush everything - followed by a lonnng hot shower and head to toe anti-bacterial gel and a month in the Bahamas on a strict Rum-only diet ... you know, a complete RE-BOOT
1 year ago on PJD's Game 5 Recap: The Walking Dead, NFL Version
Bye week where have you been all my life! I just want off this merry-go-round before I hurl all the purple kool-aid the Vikings media is trying to force-feed me. Put a positive spin on what? "We're saving Ponder from himself - a rib might pierce his great big self-sacrificing heart" (give me a break - probably got his nipple twisted too hard by Samantha in a pillow fight take-down)
1 year ago on Purple Jesus Diaries Masturbatory Game 4 Preview: On Her Majesty's Sucky Service
If only there were 17 regular season games - then we could break a record this year!
1 year, 1 month ago on PJD's Game Three Recap: Keeping That Winless Streak Alive!
Lowered expectations - I live by that mantra, as do most Minnesotans I know. Not sure if that is a result of the Vikings or a culture that made the Vikings what they are - anyway, it's the safe and sane way to survive the mental, physical and emotional toll of 40+ years as a fan. I'll be watching the game with a good friend who happens to be a Bears fan ( there is NO such thing as any kind of friend that roots for the Pukers) and have already told him I'm expecting defeat to the tune of 44 -17 or so. While I'm certain he'll make an effort to be gracious and consoling throughout - NOT, at least I've preemptively taken some of the fun out of the game for him ( a favorite tactic of long time fans like myself). That being said, I will still relish any little victories in the match-ups and hope for some discernible improvement in overall team play - oh, and a FEW drinks as well, ENJOY!
1 year, 1 month ago on Purple Jesus Diaries Masturbatory Game Two Preview: Not a Chance
I think Suh and Fairley should both be required to switch teams as well so Detroit can get a dose of their own medicine, but that's just me being vindictive and greedy
1 year, 1 month ago on Ndamukong Suh Receives Even Newer Fine for Illegal Hit
I think Ponder should put Google eyes on the front of his helmet so the DB's can't tell which receiver he's staring down at that particular moment
1 year, 1 month ago on Review the Minnesota Vikings with Google Auto Complete
Observations: Greenway doesn't seem to know what to do with Bush. Pondlander can't roll left (but wasn't on the field long enough to break a sweat, so at least he didn't mess his hair up) and instead of leading his receivers with the ball, would rather just follow them with it after staring them down the whole way. Sanford and son's tackling looked like hot garbage. If Detroit hadn't repeatedly tried to gift wrap the game and give it back to the Vikes the score should have been closer to 48 - 24. Next week should be a blast; like Detroit without all the stupid mistakes... score will be roughly 44 -13.
1 year, 1 month ago on PJD's Game One Recap: Jury Still Out on Ponder?
@CollegeWolf Too disgusted to comment right now ...... what did Adrian do to deserve this supporting cast?
1 year, 1 month ago on PJD's Game Thread: Vikings vs. Lions Season Kick-Puncher-Off!
Unleash the noobs! Pretty sure we're getting a big dose of all three first rounders this week - should be interesting. It would be great if we had a quarterback - but, alas, we do not ( I'd still like to smack the "little general" upside the head for so quickly dismissing Drew Brees). The scotch sounds great. I'm enjoying a glass of The Balvenie 14yr. Caribbean Cask (subtle hints of rum dance across the palate with a spicy, vanilla finish) as I type this - A little pricey, but I've been a good boy so... Anyway, here's hoping our guards can handle that pair of D tackles the motor city kitties are sporting and give A.D. some glorious running lanes so he can truck the secondary. Of course, if the ball should happen to grow wings and take to flight whilst finding Jennings or Rudolph I wouldn't complain.
1 year, 1 month ago on Purple Jesus Diaries Masturbatory Game One Preview: Countdown to Cassel
Still think he should have switched first names with Cassel and took her last name. Then we could be introducing Matt Steele, quarterback of the Minnesota Vikings - at least more intimidating till they saw him play.
1 year, 1 month ago on Samantha Ponder Still Coolest Wife in NFC North
Perhaps a grass- roots effort by the intelligent Vikings fans begging him to overlook the transgressions of the front office would compel him to reconsider and let go of the resentment resulting from being treated like yesterday's newspaper...
1 year, 1 month ago on Frazier Says Winfield Welcomed Back Anytime, Seriously, Please
Interesting scotch choice - have had Glenmorangie 12yr in sherry cask and loved it. Tried the port cask aged as well - a little too sweet for me; still haven't had a rum cask yet ... perhaps next review? I agree for the most part on the awkward goodbyes with the exception that I get the feeling that Joe Webb has achieved some kind of "teachers pet" status and think they'll find an excuse to cut someone better in favor of his "upside". You neglected to mention the "To be taken out and shot immediately" category which should definitely include Josh Robinson and all the game film of our esteemed offensive line (got a feeling they just didn't care.. preseason)....Oh and let's not forget JOE LOONEY! Your'e assessment of the upcoming season just feels spot on - plenty of opportunities to commiserate again this year methinks. If somehow we could beat Green Bay twice and get AD 2000yds it would be worth it! ( I can dream, right?) Any thoughts on who to re- sign from d-line for next season?
1 year, 1 month ago on Purple Jesus Diaries Masturbatory Preseason Game Four Preview: Goodnight, Sweet Preseason Princes
Ponder IS #4 - in a list of top backup QB's. I'd be fine with him in that role ( without the pressure of being the starter he might actually sine in spot duty such as the victory formation at the end of games) and Matt Cassel makes a great #3. I just want to see someone who exudes confidence and leadership as a starter. Someone who isn't content to take a back seat to Adrian and ride his coattails. No delicate ego, without the self-doubt, willing to bark a little / bite if necessary.... you know.... A STARTER.
1 year, 1 month ago on Reputable News Source Ranks Ponder 4th Best NFL QB
Jerome Felton suspended first three games for substance abuse (can we get out of that contract)? Christian Ballard where are you? Still no news on severity of Kevin Williams obvious knee injury (our depth at 3-tech suddenly very thin) . Matt Kalil must be letting his avatar play games for him. Robinson! (pleeease come back Antoine). Two nice-guy back up QB's and no starter.... I can't wait till we start cutting people so we can get a little clarity and maybe some outside help.
1 year, 1 month ago on PJD's Preseason Game 3 Recap: Thinking Up All the Excuses
Looks like 9 in the box all year again. Turnover ratio must increase significantly over last year and we need 'lights out" play from special teams to have any kind of chance to make an impact. Winning formula: AD 150 yds/game, 1 defensive touchdown and/or 1 special teams touchdown per game, and suffocating defensive play ("is that all", you say .....LONG season otherwise)
Ponder and Cassel continue to duel it out to see who can win the backup QB job - no clear winner yet
1 year, 2 months ago on PJD's Game Thread: Vikings vs. 49ers Prime Time Tease
@PJD @DavidRandallHowleII Multiple personality disorder - it happens...
@DavidRandallHowleII Hard to keep a good man down - he might squeak into the final 53
@DavidRandallHowleII Watch it again that is some DIRTY work right there! After play is over - no where near the action, drops and spears his knee
@CollegeWolf Offense: "we suck again" Defense: all good except 21
Love little big leg's kickoffs - that one through the uprights
@PJD @halweg9000 As long as AD is still a beast
@PJD What team are they watching???? Maybe there's another Ponder in a parallel universe that's not half bad?
@PJD @halweg9000 or get rid of Toy and Asiata and hit the waiver wire for a nickel db
Will have to use some kind of invisibility cloak to get that Line kid to the practice squad where he probably belongs for this year
love our d but 21 can't get it done.... next ( god I miss Winfield
Josh Robinson is the weakest link
Interest piqued - on the scotch, of course. Sounds delightful! Dalmore is my go to when I want something I'm sure I'll like, but I will give this a try. Best deal I ever scored was a 10yr single-malt. Trader Joes had a single case of Glen Ord asked about a price - $10/btl. - bought all they had after I tried one.... memories. Best part; my wife is happy with gin and tonic so I never have to share. Vikings: have watched Buffalo game twice now (" too much time on my hands...") and I'm really hoping that offensive line performance was an aberration - I really enjoy a good guffaw when comparing them to division rival o-lines. As to the passing game, maybe we should embrace what we are: eliminate the QB, WR, an O.C. positions entirely, cover the field with ten deranged,giant, road grading beasts and snap the ball directly to A.D. and let him decide where he wants to go... who's going to invest in the defensive personnel to stop it? I know , crazy talk right! But seriously, I agree with your assessment this week and remain cautiously optimistic that our defense might actually improve this year.
1 year, 2 months ago on Purple Jesus Diaries Masturbatory Preseason Game 3 Preview: Almost Real Football!
@PJD @halweg9000 Like I said we're all a little delusional and left grasping at straws.
1 year, 2 months ago on PJD's Preseason Game 2 Recap: The Exotic City of Buffalo
Amen. Christian "Checkdown" Ponder strikes again! Basically he's just given everyone who hasn't already seen it for themselves, the recipe to beat Christian Ponder - Pressure - of course, it must be EXOTIC.... I'm pretty sure that won't be much of a challenge for any defensive coordinator in the league. The big ingredient Ponder's missing is self-confidence. His body language at press conferences screams "my wife say I'm pretty good, but I'm not too sure..." ( the downward gaze before answering tough questions - "Your'e memory isn't down there - that's you're self-esteem"). Just imagine for a second what Fran Tarkenton could have done with Ponders physical tools.... I know - mind blown right? If only we could "brainwash" our players like the team sporting the colors of a bad sinus infection, then we'd really have something! Worst case scenario, they decide mighty Joe Webb can function as a #3 backup and we lose the only QB on the roster (MBT) who doesn't hesitate to chuck the ball down field. The phrases: "he who hesitates is lost", "nothing ventured, nothing gained" come to mind. Essentially we have two capable backups and one, albeit raw, potential future starter. I really hope I'm wrong; you have to be somewhat self- delusional to last as a Viking's fan after all,but reality rears it's ugly head again. Arrrrggh!
Scotch - ahhhhh.... oh and football, I predict 75% of Ponder's attempts will still be of the check down variety. He likes to read his receivers in reverse order and must have a kink in his neck that won't allow him to lift his head high enough to see past 15yds. "That's right, play it safe Ponder - remember your last throw..."
1 year, 2 months ago on Purple Jesus Diaries Masturbatory Preseason Game 2 Preview: For Ponder's Next Trick ...
@CollegeWolf I say feature the crap out of him and see if we can score a 4th rounder after 3rd pre-season game.
1 year, 2 months ago on PJD's Preseason Game 1 Recap: Under the Friday Night Lights
Really miss the single-malt reviews... had to replace my keyboard from all the drooling - but the haiku could prove to be quite entertaining as well. Keep up the good work!
But wait, didn't Wobbie already use up his big box of linebacker accolades embracing all the late round bargains... whatever will do to spin this into pure gold? Still he doesn't have any invisible girlfriends - so there's that
1 year, 4 months ago on Desmond Bishop to Join Illustrious Group of Former Packers to Sign with Vikings
1 year, 4 months ago on Jerome Simpson May Be Serviceable